To the pink sweatered woman with 3 kids under the age of 5 at the Park Lane Theatre Thurs night for the early Harry Potter showing: Go fuck yourself. How DARE you bring small children to this movie, who then act up and RUIN the viewing experience for everyone else. When the usher came in to tell you to parent or leave, you got pissed off and indignant. Bitch, half the theatre was shushing you and your stupid fucking kids. I am not rabidly child-free by any stretch of the imagination, but I find it insulting that you chose to inflict your children’s misbehavior on a theatre full of people for 2.5 hours. Next time, spend the money you spent on the kid’s tickets on a fucking sitter, or stay the fuck home.
—one of the shushers
This article appears in Jul 16-22, 2009.
New best title ever. I want that to be a real movie.
Brace yourselves folks, rant coming….
There a few places you can go an fully expect that if there are parents with kids present that the parents will keep the kids quiet or leave right away if they are start acting up. A restaurant, a museum, a movie directed towards adults, pretty much any place outdoors or indoors. …I just don’t think the early showing of a childrens movies counts as one of these places.
if you are at a children’s movie early on a Thursday ( after reading the book a million times i am sure ) and encounter children that tend to get restless after sitting still after a while like most kids do then try reading adult books and going to adult movies loser!
As an adult when the “what are you reading” question comes up ( cliche banter as it is ) I would be embarrassed as a fuctioning adult to admit a childrens book was sitting on my coffee table with a turned down page corner. Thats the problem these days is adults are so wrapped up in fantasy worlds with wizards and spells and twitter postings that they can’t keep their shit together in real life. I bet the OP has a large collection of stuffed animals on their bed and a Joey Lawrence poster on their wall. Some aspect of childhood are healthy to retain into adulthood, like taking simple pleasures in little the things, a childlike curiosity about the world around you… all good things! But keeping a child taste in movies and books,not one of them! Stop cutting things out of tiger beat magazine and be a god damn grown up and stop seeing movies with plot lines a 10 year old can follow.
Imagine this scene..
friend: Hey what are you reading these days?
Me : Oh the best book ever. Its an allegory on personal preferences in life and not being afraid to “climb the mountain’ and try new experiences in life.
friend: On my god that sounds great, whats it called?
Me: Green Eggs and Ham, hey lets go have ice cream cake for breakfast and not go to our jobs anymore.
friend:*shakes head in disappointment*
Sorry, never had my coffee this morning so its ok 😉
Lovinglife- I shall keep it short..you are absolutely WRONG in this case. I do not care if it is an early showing of Bugs Bunny..for the price I pay to get into ANY movie, I expect to be able to enjoy it without having to parent someone else’s brats. If she had HALF a brain she would have taken them and left.
Admittedly I haven’t seen it, but my friends and co-workers who have say this latest Harry Potter offering is anything but a children’s movie.
It my opinion Bobby33, not the law of the land. I am not wrong. YOU just disagree with me ( which is perfectly ok by the way).
If you went to a kids movie and had to sit through a screaming kid fest I am not saying it wouldn’t be annoying and rude of the parents to just sit there like nothing is wrong, I am saying it wouldn’t be a total surprise given the fact you are at a childrens movie. With most things in life there is nuance here.
Now if you are sitting through the first ten minutes of Saving Private Ryan and some kid is even PRESENT let alone making a peep then its time to send in the flashlight patrol.
the bulk of my rant was about adults jumping on the Harry Potter bandwagon anyway. The screaming brat thing just made me think of it.
PS – I sense a 30+ post debate on the horizon!
HELLO FRIDAY!!!
I think life would be better if more adults indulged in a bit of fantasy fiction and remembered what it was like to be kids again instead of putting on their air of superiority by flaunting Oprah’s book-of-the-month on the bus.
Regarding kids in a theatre, if it is a children’s film then I am understanding of kids laughing loudly or shouting “Daddy! Did you see that! That was so funny.” But if kids are roaming aisles and or yelling that little sis is touching my popcorn then it is time to get up and leave as quietly as possible and beat them in the parking garage. KIDDING!!
I have left many a meal half eaten in a restaurant because my daughter, who is now 4, was pitching a fit and I know it was pissing me off so I wasn’t going to force total strangers to sit through it.
Well, I think you’re both right. If I paid 12 bucks to get into a theatre there better not be some dumbass kid ruining it for everyone else. Another thing, adults can be too wrapped up in children’s stories… but I don’t think this is the case with Harry Potter. I’ve only read the first book, but I saw a few of the movies. Generally, they’re creative and to be frank I have seen more “adult” movies that did less to make me think. At least its not Twighlight or some bullshit like that.
Another thing, the Harry Potter franchise has been going on for like, 10 years? People who grew up reading it want to see the rest of the story. This doesn’t necessarily make them children book reading adults. When Toy Story 3 comes out I’m definitely seeing that in theatres.
I don’t care if it’s a childrens’ movie or not (which, incidentally, Harry Potter is not), when I pay $12 to see ANY movie, I expect to be allowed to enjoy it. And anyone that ruins it for me is going to get bitched out. Whether that be a screaming kid who can’t sit still for 2 hours or whether it’s the teenager kicking the back of my seat.
Regardless, the parent in this situation should have had more sense than to take 3 kids under the age of 5 to this movie. It’s not a kids movie, it’s over 2 hours long – of course they’re going to be rowdy. For the same money (probably less) the mother could have hired a babysitter for the evening and went to the movie alone.
bastard fish – adult movies that did less to make you think?
Gasp! are you telling “Weekend at Burnies 2″ or ” 2 fast 2 Furious” didn’t get the wheels turning? I mean you have to REALLLY pay attention in order to follow those highly cerebral plot lines, otherwise forget it you’re lost!
some people just don’t appreciate the arts 😉
You guys have high expectations. When there are 2-300 people cramped into a theatre on opening weekend, and it’s something as popular as HP, you KNOW there are going to be some kids there… lighten up a bit!
Plus, I’m sure more often than not when you go to the movies no one is being disruptive, so just cut your losses and move on with life.
Of course in a packed theatre there’s going to be a few idiots, coffee. But in this case, the OP describes a situation where everyone in the theatre is shushing them and the usher even asked them to leave! In my whole life I’ve never witnessed an usher remove someone from a theatre, so I have to believe that these people were EXTRA annoying.
Why don’t you just rent a movie and stay home where it’s quiet and brat-free? I don’t understand people who go to a movie (with sound so loud my eardrums vibrate) with 300 other people packed into the same room, eating cheese whiz nachos, grease drenched over-priced popcorn *chaw,chaw,chaw* and other disgusting shite, clutching their 3L monster cup of cola *ice tinkling, straw squeaking*, then actually expect complete silence?
I stopped going to theatres a long time ago for that very reason. Aside from the fact that it’s a colossal rip-off, yeah, there ARE going to be other people. Some of those people make sounds, rattle chip bags, giggle with their girlfriends, whine, fart, belch, step in front of you on the way to the washrooms. If these things annoy you, rent a movie and enjoy it in the comfort of your very own hyperbaric chamber of silence. How’s that for a movie title: “Harry Potter and Twatwaddle in The Hyberbaric Chamber of Silence”
You’re funny today wifey, but I think it’s the bitch with the 3 small children who should have taken your advice and stayed home in this case.
Lighten up!!! This person has a legit bitch. The kids were all under 5 according to her/hiim and I feel that is way too young for Harry Potter, but I am not the kids parents. The OP could have just been ranting and there are two sides to every story, except in this case where the usher actually had to speak to the annoying bitch.
If this happens again, might I suggest you ask for your money back….or tell the bitch to suck on your sweaty nutsack! Or start swearing like fuck, nothing upsets parents of small children more than a POTTY mouth(no pun intended)
Wifey- I have to disagree with you. Sometimes we actually enjoy going out to a movie. It is as much about getting out of the house as it is the movie experience (although watching a DVD on your lil plasma tv cannot compare to the big screen tv experience of a theater). I do not “expect complete silence” at a movie. In fact, I have learned to tune out the minor annoyances that you point out. But when some mindless excuse for a parent (in this case a sperm receptacle) allows her lovely kids to run up and down the aisles screaming then it crosses the line.
Yeah, I agree that it’s a total pain when people don’t bother to control their children. What else do you want me to say? It happens, we know it happens, but unfortunately, if someone decides they’re going to be a dick it usually interferes with our enjoyment of life in general. What is it about dumbass twatwaddles who want to share their dumbass twatwaddlery with the rest of us (presumably NON-dumbass twatwaddles)?
It annoys me like spunk dried into my eyebrows, so I just avoid the things that aren’t worth the fucking hassle.
I’m not saying there shouldn’t be children – they are a children/YA book series. I’m saying that as a parent, you have some unreasonable expectations of behavior if you being 1 small child (nevermind 3!) to a 2.5 hour long movie and expect the two year old to be so riveted, they shut up.
You could have taken Michael Jackson along, he’s supposedly good at keeping kids quiet, oh sorry he now lives in Hellwarts…..
I agree with childofcrow – Kids attending is not the issue. I was at the same screening – it was an evening show, and one of those kids was a full on baby. The other children were running around, sure – chatting a bit – but I was sort of braced for that. I was not braced for a crying, screaming, BABY. Your baby cannot enjoy the film. Your baby cannot be expected to sit in contented silence for 2 and a half hours. Babies don’t work that way, unless they are sleeping.
My personal favourite moment was when someone shushed this woman, and she decided to get up and move closer to the screen (?) and she, loudly, in the presence of all her children, said to the shusher “Why don’t you go fuck yourself.” Clearly, this woman is not concerned about what her children are seeing or learning.
Bring your kids to a kids’ movie, sure. But bring them to a matinee if possible, when the kid expectation is there, and for god’s sake, leave the baby at home. If you can’t get a baby sitter, well, I guess you won’t be going. Them’s the breaks when you have kids.
Just one point to shed light on that I noticed no one else picked up on…
“Thurs night for the early Harry Potter showing”
From what I understand from various friends that went…this took place at 11 or 12 at night, so while this is mostly an adultchild cross over movie…I am certain that any parent would realize that kiddies turn into gremlins after 10pm especially if you feed them sugar and confine them.
was this a mid night showing?
Movie came out on Wednesday DER. So the early show on Thursday was probably around 7pm.
Well being a semi-intelligent adult, I would know that if I want to go to a children’s movie, then common sense dicates that *gasp* children will be present. So to avoid this, I would do the intelligent thing and go to the late show.
@BroTim: or just avoid the silly movie in the first place…
I didn’t understand it when adults I knew said they were going…I didn’t say anything about it…but I was not sure why they would bother, especially rushing to see the “advance showing” or whatever.
Of course I went to Transformers (1-2) and those could easily be labeled “childish” and “not age appropriate”…but I just told those doctors and psychiatrists to stfu and broke out of the looney bin anyway. 😉
Was anyone else shocked at the language they used in Transformers 2? There was some pretty heavy swearing etc…
Harry Potter would give most 5 yearvolds nightmares! Unless they grew up watching scary, monster ridden shows their whole life. I know my kids won’t be watching stuff like that until they understand that monsters are ficticious and that wizard school is just as fake.
Kids will believe anything they are told until they learn the difference between fact and fiction.
And as far as letting them reek havoc in a theatre, well, she should be ashamed that she even thought they’d sit still that long.
I know mine wouldn’t.. hence, I don’t take my child there.
I went to the midnight show on Tuesday.
Some woman brought a couple 5 year olds.
…
That’s when you just yell, “SHUT THE FUCK UP! WE DIDN’T ALL PAY $10 TO LISTEN TO YOU NOW!”
I went to the midnight showing on Tuesday.
There were a couple kids there.
And a lot of people dressed up.
oops. i didnt even notice my first one posted
People going to this movie NEED TO GET A LIFE. And the mom with the kids….get a freaking box of condoms and some elastic bands to tie your legs shut@
I think that if the “entire theatre” was really shushing them then yeah, people had a right to expect that she leave or somehow make them shut up. No reason why everyone there should bend over backwards to accommodate one family.
These kids will doubtless grow up to be adult chair kickers, cell phone answerers, and loud talkers of the future.
I think the fact remains you shouldn’t be surprised to find children at a weekday matinee of a childrens’ movie in the summer. Perhaps the mother in question didn’t act responsibly. She could have taken the opportunity to teach her children, but she had just as much right to be there watching the movie as anyone else. If you want to avoid kids at the movies, go to a late night showing. Simple as that. Leave the daytime showings to parents and/or babysitters.
bean: OP says it was a nighttime showing, not a matinee.
Hmmm, I’m squarely on the fence on this. I agree that having 3 toddlers make noise and not even try to quiet them is pretty antisocial behavior. On the other hand, I agree it IS a children’s movie. On the other hand, I don’t think it’s for children THAT young.
But I strongly I agree with lovinglife on the topic of books. I recently had a friend (a 28 year old man) tell me enthusiastically that he was LOVIN’ the Twilight books, and EVERYBODY is reading them – how could I not have heard of them?
I was so embarrassed for him I couldn’t answer. I just squared my jaw and changed the subject by asking him to tell me again how talented he thinks Britney Spears is.
He didn’t get the joke.
Children at a harry potter movie?????? Oh no, what’s the world comming to?
There were lots of children at that showing – and none of them acted up aside from this twat’s kids.
Well, I just read all the comments and I’m still laughing….I’ve been to movies where I thought I might kill a couple of teenagers…so I do understand the frustration, but life is filled with ignorant parents and spoiled rotten kids, soooo sorry for your luck!
Thankfully I can take my children anywhere and they’re usually more behaved than most adults…my son’s 1st movie – Jurassic Park 3. Age – 18 months. I bet no one even knew he was there until he asked when the dinosaurs were comming back to eat more people! And he’s been in love with film ever since….always quiet and well behaved. Just wanted to point out that kids are capable of being quiet and engaged in movie theatres, and also capable of understanding fact from fiction.
@DER? I haven’t seen Transformers 2 yet, but the first one had me explaining what masturbation was….lol! Gotta learn sometime I guess.
Hey Taco…2 has some of the big swears in it, at least in terms of the kiddies. I was pretty shocked at some of them…and I swear a fair amount but they used some that even a habitual potty mouth, such as my self, would hesitate to use in public let alone around the kiddies.
Might want to postpone their viewing of this one for a few years…
Harry Potter and the annoying bitch…thanks op for completely making my week. In the context of the movie though, my hatred flares with that little skankish whore Ginny. Freaking hate that bitch.
I’ll admit I haven’t read all the comments here but I have something to add… the Harry Potter series is so well written any adult can appreciate and enjoy the writing. More adults should read. Harry Potter is a great start young or old. It’s a fantastic story, the characters are well developed and it’s a hit for a thousand other reasons that have nothing to do with making little kids squeal.
As for taking rotten kids to the theater, I’m with the OP on this. It hardly matters it’s a film geared toward a young audience if nobody in the theater can enjoy it. Remove your children when they behave inappropriately and then try again. If they still fuss after that TAKE YOUR ROTTEN SPAWN HOME
Is that what you did when your kids acted like little shits, Kay? Do you still do the same?
I think the Harry Potter series was conceived so that the children who were of the age to begin reading the first Harry Potter volume would age at about the same rate as Potter and his friends, so that by this point in the series, the books and/or films are not quite appropriate for an underage audience and are meant to appeal to teens who have grown with them and adults who have always been fans.
That being said, I do not feel it is appropriate to bring very young children to a late hour movie. Matinees are better suited to young children’s schedules, which would have been a better choice for this mom who chose to put her own veiwing needs above her children’s with unpleasant results for everyone, including those who’s viewing experience was ruined by the disruption of inappropriately aged cranky, over-tired children. Theatres should implement an age limit for late shows so that very young children are able to see the movies at a more appropriate time for them, and everyone else. I would certainly be annoyed after paying to see a movie only to have it ruined by another patron.
I am not exactly pro-children in any setting where adults are taking care of adult responsibilities, as some may know by my previous post(s), but Harry Potter? Really? No noisy kids allowed at a movie that’s based on a children’s novel? Let me make this clear: ADULTS WHO GO TO HARRY POTTER MOVIES WITHOUT THEIR CHILDREN ARE FUCKING LOSERS WHO SHOULD BE INCOVEINEINCED AND RIDICULED ACCORDINGLY. I haven’t read any of the comments on this thread because I am sick of the flaming back and forth, but Iam sure some people out there have and will echo my sentiment.
Shut up, will you.
Nai blanc- you are a fucking idiot. Can you READ THAT?
As for the lady who was there with her government supported brats..I am confused. I thought the welfare checks did not come in until the end of the month?
Your self-righteous anger is pretty cute bobby33. I doubt that in the real world you are that bold. Fucking fanboy.
nai blanc – you’re a douche.