I’m not sure what is more criminal—the theft of the giant headphones or that someone thinks it is ok to pay $12,000 for them. —Lori

This article appears in Jun 7-13, 2012.

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11 Comments

  1. it was nice of zilla to return them once he tried them on and realized they were non-functional.

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  3. I opened this expecting you to be insulting me. I was let down because either you weren’t intending it to be an insult or you were and it just fell flat. Had it actually been an insult, my response would have been:

    I had to borrow them to block out the annoying noise your mother makes when I fuck her.

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  4. fact one, they knew they would be ripped off. come on now, anything unique like that is a magnut to the nuts that run loose in this fucking city.
    fact two is that anyone paying that much, should have their noggin looked at, because of fact number one.
    fact three, their is a thief laughing out their ass right now at you fucking dumb shitheads, that would pay that much, and put them there, not chained up.

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  5. I was going for witty, not insulting….
    but now that you mention it, I didn’t realize your colour, douchePickle green, was trademarked…

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  6. Awww u mad bro? Its okay man. Next time I see your mother I’ll tell her to give you an extra hug to ease all that butthurt.

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  9. ivan, have you ever noticed how much chumly looks like jr. gorg, from fraggle rock. fuck, i love that series, the doozers are the best of them all, then of course is sprocket.

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  11. OK, now I want to see either a ransom note, ‘Missing’ flyers posted on lamp posts or photos of them spotted around the area (I bet they’d fit Theodore, f’rinstance…)

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