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I’m sorry if you got the wrong idea- but I don’t have a thing for you. I just want to be friends. Which shouldn’t be a problem because you do, supposedly, have a girlfriend. So, chill out. —Just remember what I said
This article appears in Jan 23-29, 2014.
34 Comments
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Ah yes. I’ve seen this before.
1. You hit on a guy.
2. Guy politely tells you “sorry toots. I’m not interested and am seeing someone”
3. You wrote this bitch.
Someone does indeed need to chill out.
Lately I haven’t seen any girl that I would even want to utter the word ” girlfriend ” sorry, not in my vocabulary.
Klyde you lady-killer you! OP, how did this guy ‘get the wrong idea’? The wrong idea being that you ‘have a thing’ for him? Sure you didn’t give him any reason to draw that conclusion?
Well just give into a little bit of Ass to Mouth and be done with it. It won’t hurt… honest. At least let him just stick the head in… see how it goes from there. And stop being prudish.
RSVP
Ho!s+ThatLeg (01/22, 9.00PM)
LMAO, funny you should mention that Hoist. I was once considered a heart breaker for ladies. Reason being is that I could never wrap my head around ever needing them, I could love, care, want, etc but never felt the need for them. I guess it stems from being abandoned by my mom in early life to never need them to complete me. Much as you described to TTFN in another post. See, we have something in common.
Lol, rejected!!!
Sigh… heterosexual relationship schemas…
RSVP
Saint Meaty (01/23, 10.10AM)
Is there such a thing as homosexual or lesbian relationship schemas?…just asking.
Well yeah, there are many examples outside the traditional monogamous/fidelitous heterosexual model. We (not all) tend to separate sex and love which allows many possibilities.
Gay men have long had fuck-buddies; a norm in our culture. You see this now happening in the heterosexual context as well, but to a lesser degree. As an example, the popularity of “friends-with-benefits” – ad the use of the term has become a standard in the straight lexicon.
Now those lesbians… they’re just freaks…
And the men who lust after men will be thrown to the bottom of the fire in the pits of hell and they will burn in perpetual torment and they will anguish and cry for a drop of water on their tongue to cool their unquenchable thirst, and there will be screaming and gnashing of teeth. (And a little ass to mouth action going on to liven things up a bit).
“Ass to Mouth” … technically no genitalia are involved so is it fair game for ‘friends’?
I think, Zed, SOHI99 is referring to the act where a penis enters an anus and then is pulled out and placed in the anus owners’ mouth for oral stimulation.
Did I get that right, SOHI?
meaty! what is freaky about bringing a u-haul to the second date?
basically, guys are more guy-ish when gay and women are more of a pain in the ass when gay because there are two of them pulling shit.
and i vote for meaty to fulfill all of sohi99’s repressed fantasies and give him a good poke in the arse then fill his pie hole, sans douching.
Me mom had a rough go that’s for sure, but it wasn’t her fault – there were underlying medical conditions. It may have been difficult to be around her sometimes but she NEVER abandoned me – you’re on your own with that one. As for being a heart throb…I’ll take your word for it. LOL
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Ho!s+ThatLeg (01/23, 6.05PM)
Hoist, you’ll have to forgive me for misunderstanding or not reading your previous comment about your mom correctly. All I know is I can tell you stories about my mom that would make Medusa a saint, my mom had issues with being responsible raising kids before her selfish needs. I have been in 2 foster homes where money was the motivation and I felt like a second class citizen with their own kids. Again my sincerest apology.
Yes Monster… that is the correct method. Zed… the penis is inserted into the anus of your partner of choice and then removed and inserted into the mouth of your partner. This routine is then repeated over and over until ejaculate spews forth from the penis of the inserter into the anus or the mouth of the partner receiving the hard penis. One may also ejaculate on any other body part during the travel time between the anus and the mouth.) It is a great way to finish a sexual escapade and if there are others in attendance… one may even get a standing ovation depending on distance ones ejaculate shoots.
Nice one Good Dog Molly. I love it when people shoot me down and cut me up. It means they are paying attention!
🙂 You ever take it in the hoop Good Dog Molly or are you a strictly mouth kinda prudish person?
I believe molly’s more into the tuna taco, SOHI99.
I forgive you Klyde. This time. Sounds like your mom was not a very good parent but I don’t think that ‘not needing’ another person to feel complete is a bad thing. On the contrary, if you needed another person to feel complete you would probably come off as a bit of a psycho. Just remember there’s a fine line between not needing a girlfriend and cutting women up into small bits and making furniture and clothing out of them. Actually the line is pretty thick between those two things but I trust you get what I am trying to say.
That’s ok Monster. I hear marine life insertion can be quite erotic regardless of your tastes. Especially if you are into Mexican dishes.
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Ho!s+ThatLeg (01/24, 10.41PM)
I understand where you are coming from Hoist. The issue I have is one of trust, I love women, enjoy women but at this moment I have to keep them at arm’s length. I seem to attract the control freaks or the fatal attraction types. Must be that great mane of mine that brings them, lol. I can’t say the ones I know could or would be classed as g/f’s, they fully understand that I’m a non-committal type and to enjoy what they can, I don’t use them for sex or abuse them. If that is the perception of cutting women up into small bits and making furniture and clothing of them, so be it. Being married 3 times, I have had everything chipped away and I’m tired of fighting with lawyers at the end to get scraps. Before anything gets serious now, i.e., moving in or getting married, we play with lawyers first. Pre-Nup from now on.
As I have stated before, they only get one chance to play their games or lie to me before I shut down emotionally, much like a diesel engine without oil or coolant, it shuts down to prevent further damage. I guess that stems from my mom too.
They say that there is someone out there who will fully compliment and add value to a relationship, to date, my eyes are still open.
Someday, we will sit and have coffee(your choice of venue) and we can both understand where each is coming from in respect of mom’s.
My dad lived with me for 9 years and he had paranoid schizophrenia, I may at times didn’t understand but did my best to accept it and not be judgemental of mental illnesses.
Holy dear god…
I could have lived my entire life without knowing that.
https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/1996792576/h8…
stay tuned zed, sohi is always whining about his wife leaving him and he can’t figure out why.
good lord above.
My Heavens! Such vitriol!
Now, GDM… unless a straight man throws himself at my feet (not literally; they have another, most interesting way of expressing their interest in you), I’m not interested. No offense to anyone… straight guys are hot too, just straight.
lol, vitriol? when i am encouraging him to release his inner needs? don’t i get an attagal for that? or at least a cruller? how about a toaster oven?
‘we’ give out toaster ovens, nyah nyah.
LOLOL! I googled “attagal”, wondering, “What the fuck is an attagal?” Fancy bracelet? French poofy-thing? LOLOL!
Aren’t toaster ovens just too 1990’s? Give out attagals instead!
attagal – fancy french poofty lesbian fist fucking device.
new age lesboes prefer grain threshers or butter churners.
wtf/ i have no idea what new agers would want. i’ll take a pizza hut pepperoni lovers with extra cheese.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lAjykZxKIqs
^^^LOLOL!^^^
And I had NO idea that straight men fucked bowls of mac & cheese!
portnoy fucked his family’s dinner. liver.
crap, that was a good book. the bra slung over the bathroom door knob yelling ‘fuck me big boy’ just killed me.
The reason I think op is a woman scorned is because if you truly felt the way you claim to, you would have been able to laugh it off over a cup of coffee. Like “holyshit.. that was awkward. SO glad we’ve established that you had the wrong idea”
but no.. you’re injured. Because this is pretty much what injured people do.
This one is for SOHI99
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ36S3d1CaU
You can lie, but your boner can’t.