To all the people jogging on South Park Street at like 5:00am in the morning…get a damn gym membership and do your running there! I am so sick of people running up behind me in the dark. This is really not cool. Walking to work in the morning should not be stressful but you people running up behind me are stressing me the hell out. Who in their right mind thinks it is OK to run up behind someone at 5:00am in the morning. Come on have some respect.
—Runs but is cool about it
This article appears in May 7-13, 2009.
Fuck that…. Someone should write about gyms and the mindless douchebags that pay money to go to them. Why pay to run on a machine, when you can go for a run? Ohhh the joggers scare you?? South park? Really? Wow… Rough area! Paranoid much??
You don’t own the streets, friend. If you’re so paranoid about practically invisible people trying to kidnap you at 5am, buy a goddamn bike.
Sounds like the OP is in need of some anti-anxiety meds!
A wee bit paranoid are we? Most criminals are lazy asses and at 5am most, I would surmise, are sleeping.
Get a god damn taxi if you don’t like it
Nothing beats a nice early morning run… sounds like you have deeper issues than just worrying about people running behind you… government conspiracy ?
5am runners should have to wear bells around their necks so walkers will be alerted to their presence sooner. Problem solved.
run to work then, easy solution. shit hawk, most people who pay money to go to gyms, go not just for the tred mill, but for the weight training equipment and flexibility/ balance equipment offered as well. People smart enough to want to stay in shape are deffinatley not mindless.
…really?
Maybe these people don’t have time to run later in the day. Deal with it. Turn down the iPod so you can hear them approaching.
Some people choose not to spend money on a gym membership and run outside instead, and they have home workout equipment.
“The runners are out to get me!”
*hands OP some clonazepam*
Shit. This is the most RIDICULOUS bitch I’ve ever read.
I second that. I’m one of those people that run early. It’s so nice and cool, and quiet.
I don’t mind a single runner but when three of them are heading towards you like a fucking herd of Niked buffalo, I’m as honked off as a Deadhead at a Britney lipsyncfest.
I thought it was just me! Who the fuck are these people: you’ve had a great night at the Palace, a sweet brawl at Pizza corner and you’re just crawling your way home and these losers who can’t even afford a gym membership upset your equilibrium. Tacky
pizza corner brawl? hahaha, you’re about 2 years behind the times.
and i bet the people can afford gym memberships; but why pay money to run on a treadmill when you have better terrain and oxygen outside? maybe that $80 a month is better spent on some new outfits, dining out or charitable donations.
maybe the chumps who are complaining can get a job later in the day or put the bottle down to keep their equilibreum.
5am in the morning….. uh ok.
Then maybe they should be running at 5am in the afternoon. would that make you happy?
Ummmm ok, maybe these people who are running and purposely trying to “scare” you don’t want to pay the crazy amount of money for a gym membership. Running on the cross walk is fair game to anyone who wants to run at any time they please. Stop being so paranoid.
There’s a 5 o’clock in the morning now?
no, there’s a 5am in the afternoon… when you’re zZz, but only on Monday’s, I’m sure. What do you expect from a handle that’s snoozing?
No No…it’s true…I am guilty of getting up at that ungodly hour so I can scare people. I cannot help it…it’s a sickness, but it is soooo gratifying seeing some pathetic loser piss their pants in fear from “The Running Unknown Danger” I cannot stop. I am attending “Cruelty to A$$hats Annonymous” but the meetings are wicked hard.
Just be glad the runners don’t have cake mix.
^^^lolllll doggy^^^
I bet your a good shit in the long run.
Put headphones on and you won’t hear them coming at you, scaredy pants!
I think all runners should wear scream masks for now on, then that would make sense as to why they are so scary.
oh how clever… and very constructive, kaytard.
nevermind gets it.. and I have to point it out to someone who reiterates redundancy repeatedly.