Whilst riding my bike on a busy main road, a few asshole teenagers suddenly drive up next to me, two feet from my wheels, lean out the window and SCREEAM some inexplicable phrase to me nearly a foot from my ear, then proceed to beep their horn as LOUD AS POSSIBLE!! THAT WAS SOOO COOL!!! YOU ARE SOOO COOOOOL!!! I ALMOST FELL OFF MY BIKE HEAD ON INTO TRAFFIC!! I’ve watched a few of you idiots do that to other bikers and not only is it insane, its motherfucking dangerous. Go sit on a steel tampon, you idiotic, sphincter licking vaginas.
—Dino (or almost wasn’t)
This article appears in Jul 9-15, 2009.
This is why you take a brick/rock with you and throw it in the car as they drive by. It helps if you’re near an intersection (lights > signs) b/c you can catch up to them and biff the object right at them. Or you can lean on the back of the car on the trunk and take your keys to it for a few moments.
Key-in, “Dino wuz hurr!”
Bah. They only care if their friends think they’re cool. It’ll be even cooler when they’re in juvie because they made someone lose control of their bike and get their head squashed.
You could get a retractabe baton also. Just tape it really hard against the car windows and let the stupid kid explain that to the parents.
“Yeah, some bitch smashed the window b/c we almost made her crash by yelling at her. Not my fault.” Wow, that was something Kay would say…..
Humanity at its finest. Morons.
I feel your pain. Back when I lived on PEI the animosity towards bikers was unheard of. Even though I own a car, I’d bike for the exercise and fresh air, but unless I confined myself to the biking trails 50% percent of the time it was guaranteed someone would scream from a car to inform me I was a ‘stupid faggot’, and on many occasions I had bottles hurled at me… Not that people there aren’t friendly – I suppose there were just a few dickheads driving around with nothing better to do.
Only use a rock if you can make a fast getaway.
No fucking joke, TTFN.
There really is only time enough to regain your composure and get the plate number, if you’re lucky; you couldn’t even reach for your pistol and get off a shot in time, in these situations. Fucking idiots! Of course it may never happen again, but get that plate number if you can. That is a dangerous act with a vehicle, it is prosecutable. Fucking idiots!
I honestly just smile and wave nowadays. I can’t be bothered. That and write down their plate # to forward to the HRM Police. I figure they’ll get pulled over for something so the cops may as well have something else to lean them in the direction from mere warning to ‘here’s a ticket cocksuckers’.
What a sin!!
I see people rude to bikes all the time!!!! ie-> throwing sticks opening doors beside them a friend of mine someone did somethign sim to her and she fell into traffic and broke ehr arm
Dino – your life is just one big sore that never goes away eh?
Nice job coming on a bitch board and complaining about someone bitching.
Always carry a piss-filled water bottle on your bike while biking in Halifax. Never get that smell out of the upholstery in the car…have them explain to mommy and daddy why it stanks of rotten piss…