To the guy who comes into my office and farts on a regular basis… Fuck off! Look, you’re what, 60, or 61 years old? If you can’t hold it in, go to the bathroom and release your foul stench. Why don’t you just retire already? At least I’ll be able to take your office then… you clearly stink up mine; not yours. Leaving me with a stench free existence.
—No Scents Is Good Sense
This article appears in Mar 12-18, 2009.
Go the war surplus store, get a WWII issue gas mask and put it on after you sit at your desk. He’ll either take the hint or he’ll ‘duck and cover’ in terror.
Time waits for no one, not even you. There will come a day when you will look in the mirror and discover that YOU are the same person as the one you are bitching about. You might be the bitcher itself. Play the golden rule Sir/Madam, because youth is certainly wasted on the young. You shallow whining Asshat. Grow up already, or go back to the milk Tittie.
or wear a necklace of those piney tree air fresheners….
makes it more like a bear fart in the serene foresty outdoors.
Just bring a can of air-spray to work. Next time this old coot does it, spray it right in his/her direction, they should get the point.
BM: Yes, farting is a natural bodily function, but walking into someone elses office and letting rip is just rude plain and simple. There is no arguing that fact. If you have the option to let one go other than in someone’s face/office/general area it’s extremely rude to do otherwise.
If your coworker can avoid shitting himself when he farts then his asshole is working fine. I’ll second this bitch.
Go fart in his office.
If you could cork his hole, he may implode.
a agree with ta ta. maybe he’s taking laxatives as a recreational drug.
I’d go in his office, shortly after eating a large donair, and make sure I go in right before he sees a client. Lay a big D-Bomb right in the doorway so the first thing the clients smell is the wet, greasy donair fart. Fuck with his commission, and that’ll usually learn him.
Add a pound of hummus to the donair for an eye-watering sonic boom.
don’t forget a good heaping of laxatives to speed up the process.
I think we’ve created a weapon of mass destruction.
I used to share an office with a guy who would eat donair every day for lunch then let it rip randomly throughout the afternoon. You couldn’t hear them, but you sure could smell them.
Luckily we worked in the type of environment where we all thought it was hilarious, except that one time the stench lingered and I had to go find another office to work in. That kinda sucked.
Don’t you mean “weapon of ASS destruction”, TTFN?
*glggle*
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!
good one kitty, there goes the other kidney…
what the fuck is donair, btw.
It could be your breath !