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I’m tired of being reminded of how miserable my life is because I have no one to share it with….thanks to eHarmony with your suppertime ads that remind me even moreso….guess I can’t find happiness without love….guess my life is worthless….or so your ads. tell me…..pricks
This article appears in Jul 24-30, 2008.
13 Comments
Just sign up already then and be happy. 😛
And your new love will be PRESCREENED! Based on algorithms and stuff! Can U Not Try?
Does anyone remember that late night infomercial from the 90s, it was one of those call-in chat numbers or something, but the guy was really obnoxious… he said 100x during the broadcast ” It’s private, confidential, 1 on 1 and DISCREET!” It was so bad. He was always saying things like “if you’re alone now, you’ll be alone forever”.
Oh come on, Qwerty, you’re not dissing David “Prince of Love” Bronstein, are you? :PDon’t pay it any mind, OP. People in relationships are *just* as miserable, so you’re not missing anything! 😉
I always got a kick out of the frequent “Pick up the Phoooooone” commercials that aired frequently while South Park was on, Friday nights through the 90s.
I wish it was still the 90s. That Y2K virus ruined everything.
True – relationships can be pretty miserable too. At least if you’re single you don’t have to share the remote.
There’s an old saying that goes something like: Having is not nearly as good as wanting…
Those “cat got your tongue” commercials were gold! That redhead was amazing, and the woman who dressed up like a Hostess cupcake was yummy! :DOkay, I officially watch too much TV.
Speaking of cupcakes, anybody ever watch old Miami Ink or more recently LA ink? I love me some Pixie! with her cupcake tattoos. Yum.My fucking god those women are immature though.
I have to say, I’m very much a fan of Kat Von D. I’m way too much of a dork (and a wimp; no tattoos here) for a chick like that, but hell, I can dream.
She is smokin’…but so so immature. Dunno if I could deal…
Qwerty, I remember that one. I think the “actor” was drunk/stoned while doing it, and he never bothered to shave. Then there’d be “testimonials” by everyone from skanky skanks to mature NFL football enthusiasts. Pick up the phone was awesome too. The 90s need to come back immediately.Oh, and OP, try Plenty of Fish. It’s free, and it actually worked for me.