Okay, people… which one of your inbred parents ever told you that, as a pedestrian, your flaccid little bodies could produce an instant force field the second you step off the sidewalk and in front of an oncoming car? Which one told you that pressing the button on the crosswalk lights activates the deflector shield that will make cars bounce off you or stop on a dime? All it would take is one, just ONE, dumbfuck pedestrian to become a fine red mist on the center line before the remainder *might* realize what my mother told me as a kid: cross the road as if your life depends on it. I could make a literal killing in this city selling insurance to drivers that would cover them in the event some mental midget tried to walk in front of their two-tonne vehicle, forcing the idiot pedi to pay for the damage they did to the car/truck/etc as a result of their thoughtless decision to NOT stop and wait for traffic to see them before they proceeded across the street.
And for the equally idiotic drivers in this hellhole I call home: you fucktards must own stock in Cracker Jacks, because I’m sure that’s where you’ve been getting your drivers’ licences lately, what with the lack of turn signals (it goes like this: SIGNAL, BRAKE, TURN… not BRAKE, TURN, SIGNAL, and sure as FUCK not TURN/NO SIGNAL), or assuming that exiting a driveway gives you the right of way over oncoming traffic. The next dumbass that thinks that pushing their car halfway out of a driveway will make me stop and let them out, just ’cause they wanna go, can think again – you’ll get a warning blast from my horn, a full view of my middle finger, a handful of choice words, and, if you’re lucky, I won’t run over your hood. If you DO manage to catch a break in traffic and are pulling out of a driveway/side street and into the road, for the love of fuck, if the car coming up on your bumper is moving faster than you are, then get the fuck out of the way – you’re impeding the flow of traffic and risking an accident!
Rule of thumb that’s always worked for me (as a driver OR as a pedi): if it’s bigger and/or moving faster than I am, then regardless of whether I have the right-of-way, I’m going to get the fuck out of it’s path! Also, I’ve noticed a lot of folks who must be extremely timid in their overall lives, because asking them to drive the posted speed limit of 50/70 km/hr is like asking them to drive at mach 8… c’mon, grandma, drive it like you fucking own it would ya, or get the fuck out of the way of the people who actually have somewhere to go. —Aggressive (But Refreshingly Sane) Hali Driver
This article appears in Mar 22-28, 2012.
refreshingly accident free as well. i hope
With that attitude, you’re probably causing a lot more problems on the road than you think you’re solving with your ‘superior’ driving techniques.
This kinda reminds me of what my father used to say, ‘The graveyard is full of people that had the right-of-way’…
Oh ya OP your exactly what we need on the streets, FFS, do you also carry a ’45. Calm down.
Scotians do drive slow as fuck, and seem to think they can just cross the street whenever they feel like it. They’d get killed in a real city.
“Rule of thumb that’s always worked for me (as a driver OR as a pedi): if it’s bigger and/or moving faster than I am, then regardless of whether I have the right-of-way, I’m going to get the fuck out of it’s path!”
So if a trucking speed demon comes barreling around a corner and up behind you on a one lane street, you’re going to hop the curb and mow down anyone smaller than your car….
well that’s interesting insight. Good luck with that.
Jesus, smoke a bowl psycho
i would guess o.p., the same one, that gave them their huge sense of entitlement, over us ordinary humans.
I think you’ve covered the road rage spectrum. Time to chill and drive like a responsible human being.
Fucking rage jockey.. In this city you’ll never travel fast enough to do more than break my leg.
And then i’ll OWN your car.
You’re asking people to ignore their own rights so you can skirt the law. Right.. Goodluckwiththat.
When the light is red, stop. When the little walk man appears, stop. Yield at yellow lights and stopsigns. Mmkay monkey?
You really need to get laid op.. It’s gross what happens to men when they’re not getting any.