This article appears in Nov 27 – Dec 3, 2008.
Dear ex-boyfriend
Dear ex-boyfriend:No. No, for the hundredth time, I do not want to be your friend. You chose to end it. You made that decision.You’re a nice guy and all, but you took my family away from me. You took the one stable woman your son has ever known out
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block his number/msn contact/text number, etc…I mean unless you do that you’re just ASKING to be contacted. If you really didn’t want him around you’d’ve done that by now…maybe you still have some “getting over him” to do? And if you do it’s best just to cut him off all together. I generally can’t stay friends with my exes regardless of the reason for the break up and it’s hard, but cutting them off completely (including msn/phone number blocks) you won’t be able to get over him.
I agree Pretty kitty, I cut off all contact with my last ex after he ended things with me, and although it was hard at first, I can happily look back and say I wouldn’t have done anything differently. It gives you the last word without having to say a word, and you never have to worry about that gross feeling of having felt like you made an ass of yourself with those teary, drunken, grovelling or else ”I’m going to tell him off for breaking my heart” phonecalls.
You think too much of yourself OP. I would FAR rather live with a “less attractive, less intelligent, less educated, personality of a dishrag” but who is kind and gentle and humble (even though I know nothing about this other woman). Sounds to me like you are demanding, high maintenance and not just a little bit vengeful, and your lack of maturity shows when you fall short of showing any kind of friendship to someone you once professed to have loved. Even civility would be acceptable, but it appears you can’t manage that. Forget his motives, show your maturity, let go of your resentment and keep open communication; who knows, maybe you will find you have a friend for a time of need.
OP, if you don’t want to be a “friend” to your ex then WHY carry on some semblance of a relationship with the child and other family members? If his life is no longer your business then stay the fuck away, as you claim to want. Despite your bitch, you’ve inserted yourself into this guy’s family. Personally, if ANYBODY wants a relationship with my child they first need to show the parent proper respect. WHY would I encourage my children to hang with my enemies and carry on some semblance of a relationship with the child and other family members? Do yourself a favor and fuck off! Completely. The kid will get over it in short order considering there’s a new mommy on the immediate horizon and the parents… get your own.
Maybe he just got sick of “picking up the pieces.”