What happened? We dated for three weeks and had a fantastic time. Our times together consisted of a pile of laughs and opening up about what we wanted in life. We had sex twice during that period. You were exactly what I was looking for all these years—I’m 36—in a potential long-term girlfriend, beautiful inside and out. I suggested we open the next door and go exclusive. You were hesitant and said we should take that slower. I was perfectly fine with that and backed off, not wanting to come on too strong. A week after that discussion, you end it with me and told me I wasn’t what you were looking for but didn’t really give me a reason why, just told me we weren’t a match. I don’t understand, from our talks it seemed like I would be what you were looking for—I’m reasonably intelligent, I have a good job and good social skills, I’m sensitive, well travelled and goal-oriented, and I treated you with nothing but respect. Isn’t that what a well-rounded girl looks for, after all? You even told me twice that’s what you want in a guy! I then thought you were just scared to commit, but this week I discover you’re back on the dating site, clearly stating you still wanted long-term. What did I do wrong? Or were you just lying to me? I’m baffled. -Dodged a Bullet?
This article appears in May 15-21, 2014.
yes, it’s complicated because it involves humans.
why ask what went wrong? what difference does it make. if someone doesn’t want you, they don’t want you. no arguing, reasoning, pleading, bargaining will change that.
the heart wants what it wants and if it doesn’t want nothing will change that. walk away. shrug it off. you don’t want to be with someone who doesn’t enthusiastically want you.
No wonder she broke it off, after three weeks you want exclusive (marriage?). That would scare many off or make you look like you were needy and desperate. At least that’s my take.
This forum isn’t for this twaddle, please call 1-800-DR-PHIL
My cat does this shit to me all the time.
Plastic wrap clings less than you.
Agreed Bro Tim, and the post by OP pretty much confirms it. (desperation)
Yes – OB – you dodged a bullet. Maybe she wanted someone taller? Uglier? Someone she could control? Who knows, but then – who cares? If she’s not into you, she’s not into you. Move on. I imagine the sex part alone (twice in THREE weeks? really, that’s all?) would have been a relationship killer anyway…
Just because you look good on paper, doesn’t mean the reality is the same.
I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with you, OB, but you just weren’t her cup of tea.
Move on. And perhaps show less desperation, next time (you sound kinda clingy).
Aight man, go out and get yourself a hooker. Tell her this tale as you cryfuck her and you’ll feel tons better. Next one don’t get all wishy washy and act like a giant pussy, you’ll do fine then. Tim’s right you prolly just scared the shit outa her.
This is gonna be a changin’ day in your life cuz Dr. NoFool gonna tell you exactly where you went wrong. You got dumped after sex so basically everything was all cool until you took ya pants off. You may be of average size but maybe her last boyfriend was hung like Donkey Kong but then you brought out your pointy little bee stinger… compared to Durk Diggler, she knew dat mushroom tip would never do the trick. Scenario 2 – you are a selfish, lazy or ignorant lover. 95% of men need to educate they selves on the female anatomy. One time I was with a dude who sucked my left labia lip so hard he permanently disfigured my poonani. One lip hangs down longer than the other now. He was sucking it so hard it felt like he was biting me, I said “Owww” …. “Owww BITCH” but maybe he couldn’t hear me with da thick thigh earmuffs on …I had to smack him several times upside the head before he would stop! It was a huge turn off and I never let him near me again. Unfortunately his mark lives on. The third scenerio is you turned into a needy clingy pushy leach after you tapped it. Insecurity is a huge turnoff and so are dudes who make a nuissance of theyselves. Stop calling/texting 5-10 times a day. Even 3 time a day is too much. Even once every day is too much. Stop smothering a bitch. And after you’re dumped have the common sense to bow out with dignity and take no for an answer, not harrass her with whining and cry baby shit. Move on mafucka and work on ya game! Dere’s plenty more fish tacos in da sea!
I hate to agree (somewhat) with Dr Skeeze-Fool, but it makes sense that she dumped you because the sex was bad. She fucked you two times then split — the second time was probably to see if the first time was bad because it was the first time. When it was shitty the second time, she figured it would always suck and to some, bad sex is a deal breaker.
I laughed so hard at no_fool’s comment i cried.
get a cat.
http://cdn.acidcow.com/pics/20121231/catur…
I learned that labia=fish tacos. No fish tacos for me! Thanks No_fool!
poonami…LOLOL!
No_Fool for post of the year.
Never thought I would hit the ‘like’ button on a no fool comment but apparently hell has frozen over and pigs can fly now.
You dated the girl for only three weeks and already you wanted to be her serious boyfriend?? I agree with the others, you are clingy and desperate as fuck. If you are all of those kick-ass things you say you are, but she still didn’t want you, this is likely the reason. Fuck, you probably (originally) closed down your account after the first meeting or two!
Or maybe you’re just ugly? Yeah, yeah, she fucked you, but maybe it was just pity sex and she just forced herself through it. And if she’s the well-rounded chick you said she was, she only fucked you twice because she realized forcing herself to have sex with someone she found unattractive is not appealing. Was it drunken sex?
Or the sex was awful, like others have also said. Do you think those two soft skin flaps on the woman’s pussy is the clit, by any chance? Or are you one of those losers who refuse to go down on a girl, but still expect a blowjob?
I honestly think this is the first sexual encounter OP has had and is equating sex with love, no wonder the wounds are so deep that he can’t let go. Sounds like my nephew, he cries croc tears to his mom so his sleazy g/f can come over to satisfy his blue ball syndrome.
op sounds like a dull stick indeed. he itemizes things like an accountant (sorry J) when he is dealing with emotions. he has/does such and such and so and so, ergo he must be loveable by HER.
that’s not how it works. there has to be the attraction, the yearning towards that undefinable essence of the ‘other’. it’s why women spend the first part of their lives saying they are only attracted to tall dark & handsomely mysterious, but suddenly falls head over with a burly red headed chef who makes her laugh til she pees herself.
Three weeks and you were pressuring her for a fucking commitment? I would have run like a armadillo with its ass on fire.
Three weeks? I’ve known library books longer, and some of them were MLP, the diagrams are very life like.
oh basil that made me laugh really hard lol
Bahahahahaha “fish tacos.”
Speaking of “fish tacos”…I was waiting for the bus on Main St in Dartmouth, the other day when I noticed a guy in a truck, with a sign that read “Fresh clams for sale” parked in the parking lot of the peeler bar. Lol
You should have asked him out, CROCK
You don’t come here for relationship advice OP. That said, Bro Tim is probably the closest to the real answer. She was on the fence and “opening the next door” knocked her off, on the wrong side.
As for the sex, my experience is that one bout of bad sex sends them running.