Be the first to know about breaking news, articles, and updates.
The Coast | News, events, restaurants, concerts and Burger Week for Halifax, Nova Scotia
Home of the Best of Halifax Reader's Choice Awards, the award-winning independent newspaper covers the Halifax news, politics, events, concerts, movies, restaurants, and nightlife scene.
Sick of living in Cape Breton… all these people worry about is whatever other people are doing, tea, oxy cotin, and complaining about the mainland. Instead of bitching get off your lazy fat ass and work harder… p.s. I hate tea. —Mainlander
This article appears in Mar 1-7, 2012.
39 Comments
What’s that old saying? “Capers are just Newfies that got lost on their way to Ta-ron-na.”
Say what you want about them, you got to admire a people who can name a roadside food stand ‘Lick a Chick’ and have it come off sounding “quaint” to the mainlander toor-ists.
And the place names kill me: Mabou. Upper Mabou. Upper Southwest Mabou. Upper Southwest-but-North-of-the-old-MacNeil-homestead-,Archie-MacNeil-not-Donald-MacNeil-You-Know,-Ralph’s-Brudder,-West-of-the-Old Presbyterian-Church-That-Burned-Down-in-’43 and-East-of-the-Women’s-Institute-Bean-Supper-and-Bingo-Hall-2-beers-down-the-old-number-4-highway-Mabou.
The Highlands are A-MA-ZING! Gorgeous.
One word – move.
Leaf tea alone!
wabo’s pizza / Mr. Chicken ftw!
relocate them to the city and blast that rock clean off…
People live on Cape Breton Island? Wow……. I heard of people residing on the Island…. but, actually living? Who’d a thunk it! ~ learn something new on this board every day!
lol…2 words….Smooth Hermans
well it’s been closed for a while there avast…
so no real need to relocate it.
plus it was hideous…
good riddance.
No no no no no Avast0 … you mean The Capri.
You know a place is going to be … interesting … if you have to climb a flight of stairs to get in while drunks take the short roll down …
I wasn’t talking about reviving or relocating the dive, zZz. Just threw the name out there to stir up foggy memories…(or nightmares, whichever applies). It was definately a hole, no doubt about that.
lol Donk, that’s the ‘express exit’. I’m from the OTHER island myself, (PEI), so I’ve seen a few places like this. Situate the offending drunk near the top of the stairs, hit the handle labelled ‘flush’ and watch him spin around as he disappears. Voila! Problem solved.
Wait a second Avast, you’re from PEI and you’re making fun of us Capers? Your island is as much fun as a sandbox in the wintertime!… No Offense, of course.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA, Vastie!
and LOL @ the capri!
At least there’s sign of intelligent life (well breathing life) in Sydney…. you try spending YOUR summers in buttfucknowhere, Cape Breton (isle madame) where all you got is a chicken hut and a starvin’ marvin’s.
No wonder I’m fat.
Love the scenery but would rather gnaw on a live porcupine’s arse cheek than reside there. Try the excruciating drive from Louisbourg along the Atlantic coast to Richmond County – the Comotose Route – full of German billboards, a 100,000 Pothole Challenge and no fucking gas stations.
Isle Madame, Kitty? That’s where my old lady was born. No wonder she was fucking nuts.
I’m assuming the ‘chicken hut’ was the local dive bar…
and starvin marvin’s was a vegan joint?
BAHAHAHA, TTFN — we’re probably related.
the chicken hut was an actual hut that made chicken. And starvin’ marvin’s sold chips, sunflower seeds and rented VHS.
How do you starve a Cape Bretoner?
Hide his paycheque in his workboots.
If there’s a Martell or Boudreau in your family, we’d probably be related – I went to Grand Anse for two weeks in 1969 and for a 15 year old city kid, listening to the locals with their ‘dis, dem, dese and doze’ – fuck, that accent drove me bananas.
OH HOLY FUCK.
I don’t have either through blood, but I certainly do by marriage. I’m sure if you go back enough, though, we’re probably linked somehow.
You’ve probably met my ma in your youngin’ days, at that.
*shakes head* well I’ll be fucked.
Include some Sampsons into the mix, Kitty – they’re freaking everywhere in Richmond County.
an actual hut that made chicken!
wow… kinda like dolly the sheep?
or did they just let the chickens bump uglies and raise them from an egg?
Big things have been done in that buttfuck little place, Zed. big things.
No offense taken, Captain. And, I suppose you could take what I wrote as ‘making fun’ of CB. But really, it was more of a friendly nod of familiar recognition. I mean, how else do you think I could so accurately relate…I could have just as easily been describing someplace in PEI. lol. (Except for the Lick a Chick of course) It’s what makes you Capers (and us Redfoots) unique.
But I will say if you can’t have fun on ‘THE’ Island…you’re doin’ it wrong, Buddy.
I’d like to amend that a bit….
if you can actually REMEMBER not having fun on the island, you’re doing it wrong…
See, if I was actually making fun of CB, I could have said something like:
“Did you hear Cape Breton just got a new zoo?
They built a fence around Glace Bay.”
See what I did there? No offense of course. lol
I like your version better, zZz
so that’s where the metro drivers come from, shit, whoda known.
Bahaha, Glace Bay… what a sweet, innocent little town! Great place to raise the cubs.. uh, I mean kids.
And you’re right, PEI is a blast in the summer time. I’ve had some pretty decent cottage vacations out there. Plus it’s got a big ass bridge, you can’t go wrong with that.
“Did you hear Cape Breton just got a new zoo?
They built a fence around Glace Bay.”
No no no Avast you keep getting it wrong sillllly. They built a fence around New Waterford.
Heh
I hear fiddles playing “Duelling Banjos” from “Deliverence”.
ttfn, there are and were, martins, sampsons, martells, and macdonalds, in my family tree.damn it sis, we’s be related maybe. poor you.
haha, that’s what i thought too, timothy, but aren’t we all related?
Donkin has a lovely graveyard. I spent afternoon 3 of my honeymoon there, watching my wife cry. FML.
PG are you saying you want to have relations? LOL.
John TMI. Did you go there for yur divorces too?
Cheeky Monkey *threatens backhand*
Suffice to say. the old cliche that Donkin is a newlywed couple’s 2nd biggest disappointment was proven true.
Ew you went to Donkin for your honeymoon … …
Blehhhhh Y U DO THAT?
Hey, Lifey, you, me and Kitty can be the Unholy Trinity of Richmond County.
Actually, the best clams and chips I’ve ever had was at a little restaurant in Louisdale which I used to call ‘Hooterville’ when I was younger.
We went to CB for the honeymoon, Donksturbia. The Margaree, the Trail and Louisbourg all Rawked, big times. The Donkin visit was so SOBova could visit her Grandmother’s grave. After 10 minutes I was ready for a shot of Bushmills and a couple of verses of “The Company Store”
>: (
P.S. There’s a picture of me standing in front of the fort at L-Bourg., totally rawking the Tom Clancy look. I’ll bring it to the next summit. *nudge, nudge*
Hey mmm Heartz, are you by chance from the Acadian fishing village where those fine eating establishments call home? Btw Mr Chicken is the best fried chicken anywhere
Did ya hear about the Caper who hijacked a submarine?
He held the crew hostage, demanded $50,000 in small, unmarked bills……and a parachute!