I understand the appeal of umbrellas, don’t get me wrong, but don’t forget that you’re wielding a semi-dangerous weapon. I got two scratches on my face so far from people who forget that their personal rain-shields have pointy edges which are perfect for poking the eyes out of taller people. If you’re not willing to share the street, leave your goddamn umbrellas at home! Most of your hair looks like shit to begin with—just pull up your hood! —Get a Grip
This article appears in Sep 6-12, 2012.
windstorms are a bitch o.p.,when the winds grabs the thing and pulls it out of someone’s hands. it is just like a thrown spear. i have actually been hit in the back, front and sides on different occasions. while it isn’t life threatening, it can hurt like a bastard. and if it gets you in the eye, then there is more trauma.
Phhht! – This guy:
http://truebrit.files.wordpress.com/2009/1…
knew how to use a brolly as a lethal weapon.
Don’t stand too close to a person about to open their umbrella, other than that really not too much advice from here.
Umbrella..ella.. ella.. ella..I can’t stand that GD song.
i think OP is talking about deadly umbrellas wielded by others walking on the sidewalk. the UW (umbrella wielder) is unable to see where their umbrella’s poky parts are, errr poking. being tucked nicely inside the imbrella’s umbrella of protection. the UV (umbrella’s victim), if taller than the UW, gets facially assaulted by the wildly swinging umbrella. the UV, if shorter than the UW, get the top of her head scalped.
the solution is to carry your own umbrella, thus acquiring one’s own umbrella of protection.
umbrellas are dandy weapons on crowded public transit.
i think they’re fairly useless, i see lots of dead umbrellas on my windy corner http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_L1eGCX7YXSU/TEoW…
A crow riding a vulture. Painey, I still say crows are bird world’s adrenaline junkies.
I love that pic, PG. Not without precedent in the world of human aviation, either:
http://www.thejigasaurus.com/jigasaurus/d/…
imagine that in mid-air…
http://gizmodo.com/5942102/watch-two-plane…
Just think of all the cleaning costs… what with everyone defalcating in their seats.
Umbrellas are useful… so long as you have a decent, sturdy golf umbrella in your hands.
Anything smaller has a shelf-life of about a week and a half. Even less if you have to walk barrington or lower water…
Try moving out of the way of the pointy umbrella edges…
Zed – that has been known to happen; sometimes with very surprising results:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1940_Brockles…
As much as I avoid history… that shit is fascinating.
I’m with the lower plane… I’d be bailing out faster than you could open the door.
There’d be a Zed shaped imprint through the cabin wall.
I’d also feel bad for those below as the fallout from my departure would be much fresher than ‘blue ice’.
Oh yeah. All the more impressive considering that the pilot who landed the 2 was still in training. 14 days confinement for “talking to the press” – it’s a wonder we won the bloody war>; )
I was walking in the rain with my trusty umbrella the other day when two of the FATTEST chicks on the planet were walking SIDE-BY-SIDE toward me on the sidewalk ….. no plan to moo-ve out of the way ….. I held my ground and the pointy thing scraped the noggin of the FAT BROAD on the right ……. what did she expect? Even if they were walking SINGLE FILE there would barely be room for me on the sidewalk ……. if you are large enough to need a “wide load” sign then please use some common sense and not walk two-two by four-four.
Imagine surviving that mid-air collision, single handedly landing both planes at the same time, saving both yourself and the town you were flying over, getting praise and recognition for the near impossible task….only to die 4 years later in a bus-bicycle collision. That’s fucked!
Bullies?
Holy fuck society is filled with pussies. Nuke ’em all.