I just got engaged. Excited, I showed people my beautiful ring. Everyone else was so happy for me. But when I showed it to you, you say in a snotty tone “Oh, look! Now you’re a whole person!” and walked away. Um, how rude?! That is not something you say to someone who is just happy. I’m sorry you’re so bitter and sad that you have to belittle someone who is about to be married. Funny how so many single people say this shit. —Future wife
This article appears in Nov 27 – Dec 3, 2014.
Oh, I’m pretty sure there was more to the comment than someone’s alleged jealously over your engagement… how long did you drone on about marriage? I’m certain them whole person comment came from a previous statement you made too, now being wiped in your face. Remember, the divorce rate is about 50%, so we’ll see you in court in a few years…
Feminism – ruining good times for everybody for the last 100 years.
http://d1o2xrel38nv1n.cloudfront.net/files…
Not just single people say that shit…..
Ummm, you are still a single person until the wedding and then you will be one-half of a married couple. Up to and including this moment in time you are legally single. No documents I ever saw have an option for “dating”, “engaged” nor “fuck buddy” to identify your relationship status. The “common law” requires you to live together for at least 12 months which would make the excitement of being “engaged” a moot point.
Make sure your paperwork is in order and both of you need to have a comprehensive credit check done so as to be open about all financial obligations. The moment you say “I Do” is taking on 50% of everything (or losing 50% of everything, depending on how one looks at it).
G’luck with that.
AN ONTOLOGICAL POINT
“But when I showed it to you, you said in a snotty tone ‘Oh, look! Now you’re a WHOLE person.” Future wife.
I believe you misintepreted her comment. Is she a philosopher? I would have said that she was making an ontological point. Many claim that the sexes are only partially complete before their union when they become “as one.” You might want to discuss her ontological views with her further. Start with the questions: “What is reality? What does it mean to be really human?” Write back soon with your conclusions.
Avatar #95: A One Dollar Note from the International Bank of Canada (1858). “A supreme achievement,” The Coast)
A pleasure as always.
Cheerio!
well, my mother would roll in her grave if I spoke out like op’s rude person, but I would have given a polite smile but been thinking the same thing. ring flashing is disgusting. what are you presenting op? the trappings of stuff, diamonds, wedding glitz? or a loving relationship that is about to become affirmed in the eyes of the world, the law and your family?
and signing ‘future wife’? what does that say about what you think you are now? just waiting til you become ‘a wife’, eh? I think your friend nailed it.
Ah, marriage. The ring is simply a payoff for all the future duties that you will render for said spouse. Work full time? Rest assured that you’ll still be doing most of the housework and child-rearing. Good luck with that.
Someone once told me that when a young man marries, he wants a whore in bed, a mother in his middle-age and a nurse in his old age.
I’ve been married twice and I can assure you there will never be a third time.
Enjoy the sparkle of your ring, OP, I don’t envy you one damn bit.
They were probably thinking, “So you’re getting married, who really gives a royal fuck”. Said in a snarky way so they would not be invited to a boring wedding and have to give your sorry ass a present.
Love is blind so make certain to get the audio-book because love ain’t deaf.
Congratulations on your engagement, OB. I sincerely hope everything works out well for you.
I have been very happliy married for a long time. I can’t say the same for the small number of sad, miserable bastards that made negative comments to me when I first got engaged.
Your engagement is reminding certain people of their own very deep and painful personal dissatisfaction. Otherwise, why would they even bother to make negative comments to you. So, please try to ignore that type of person.
Cheers and all the best,
Zippy
Congrats OB, but just because you’re happy as well as excited by this. Doesn’t mean everyone else will be…. & by the look of the above comments . There’s a lot of bitter people ,who have been in failed relationships & are jaded to the whole damn world …..LMAO
When the world tosses you lemons , make lemonade.
If instead it covers you in shit, compost it & start a garden ~:D
flame away folks (can’t wait to hear what the kitty, who brags about the size of her vibrator in her avatar name, has to say)
http://www.quickmeme.com/img/63/63718d84a1…
Hey, who’s bitter? I’m a realist who’s lived long enough to know there’s no ‘happily ever after’. Marriage isn’t sunshine and rainbows, it takes a lot of work to make it last. I’ve been married for 32 years and I love my partner to pieces.
My partner was seriously injured about ten years ago. The spinal injury left him with little control on the left hand side of his body, similar to a stroke. There is no cure for his condition, he is only going to get progressively worse until he’s in a wheelchair. I’ve been his caregiver ever since. Watching someone you love decline is heartbreaking. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
So our retirement plans went out the window because he has to struggle so much to make the simplest walking movements. It also doesn’t help this Halifax is one of the most unfriendliest cities when it comes to accessibility.
It didn’t make me bitter – it made me incredibly sad that we can never share the simple experiences that most people take for granted.
I have a half dozen friends in a similar situation. And like them, remarriage after the demise of our spouses is OFF the table.
you know what? if someone is prancing around waving her ring at people, it’s really not about love or marriage. it’s nyah nyah nyah. op comes across as snotty little twit who is focussed, not on her so-called beloved, but on *her* ring, and *her* upcoming status as a ‘wife’. and she got pissed when someone didn’t get envious. when someone called her out on her emPHAsis on the wrong syllAble of marriage. remember, op did not say she announced her engagement to be married. instead she jumped around the office thrusting her hand at people. ewww. ick. showing off a hunk of metal and carbonized dino poop. or whatever it was. and I say that is shallow as a dime. because….wait for it….I believe in that love stuff. and it has nothing to do with rings. love is wonderful. weddings are just a big party that lately have taken on potlatch trappings.
It’s unfortunate when relationships don’t turn out as expected, or when unanticipated challenges develop but we all get our “kick at the can” and I don’t see why anybody should discourage the OB from taking hers.
I really do wish you all the best in your marriage, OB, but I think you have this person’s intentions wrong. I doubt they’re ‘bitter’ towards the fact that you’re getting married (most people don’t give enough of a shit about you and your life – we’re a narcissistic species, OB), you honestly sound obnoxious as fuck – I’m sure you’re just really excited, but going around flashing your ring was probably really fucking annoying and while I think this person should’ve kept their opinion to themselves (because what they said was rude – to say it, not to think it), I can guarantee you many of the people you were flashing your ring at were thinking the same thing – married or single. I know girls like you – I grew UP with girls like you: marriage is the pinnacle of your existence. And I’m not saying that’s a bad thing – for you. If your goals in life are to get married (and have kids, a house, etc…) and that truly makes you happy ALL THE POWER TO YOU. Many of my ‘country’ friends I spent my teenage years with are married and have kids and that’s all they ever wanted out of life and are happier than pigs in shit, and I’m genuinely happy for them! I’m happy for my friends because they are dear to my heart and I want nothing but happiness for them in their lives. That’s not necessarily MY idea of what I want out of life, but I fully support lifestyle choices of my friends that make them happy, even if that same thing wouldn’t necessarily make me happy. And vice versa on their part. That’s what makes a great friendship!
I hope you’re thinking beyond the wedding, OB. As exciting as your wedding planning and the actual wedding will be, the wedding is one day – hopefully the MARRIAGE (which is what this is all about – it’s not about the wedding or the pretty shiny ring, it’s about a marriage) lasts a lifetime and you understand that going in. Marriage isn’t a ring and a wedding – it’s a relationship that can be shitty as fuck, sometimes, and wonderful as fuck, other times. I’ve seen too many people in my age group get married and get depressed after the wedding is over because “what now?” and go ape shit when it’s not all bliss and happiness. Talk to someone who’s been married more than 10 or even 20 years, and you’ll get the real scoop.
And hay, More-on – weren’t you the one who was always complaining about your ex and how you’d never get involved in relationships beyond banging prostitutes before you met that ginger minge of yours?
My honey gave me a gorgeous 1 karat antique diamond ring for our engagement in the late 1980s. I only commented on it if someone asked me about it. I sure as fuck wasn’t going to wave it in people’s faces. Means fuck all to them.
OB: “Funny how so many single people say this shit.”
Y U say single like it’s a bad thing? Some people are single by choice – like me. I be dumping these dingleberries left n right cuz I don’t want a relationship- and certainly not marriage! Hang on to dat diamond chip so you can pawn dat shit on kijiji.
I actually kind of agree with mo’fool. Not every single person is miserable! I’ve been single for a while, and while I’m nowhere NEAR anti-relationship, I’m content with my life. I look at it like this: if I meet someone I click with, great! If I don’t? *shrug* I’m alright on my own. I have a few female friends who absolutely can’t be alone. One actually bitches about that fact to me and has said she envies the fact that I can be single and happy, whereas she never could. That can be debilitating – always jealous in relationships because OMG they can’t have their significant other break up with them and always worrying about what they’d do if their partner left them. I say if my partner doesn’t want to be with me, I don’t want them to stay. I’d rather be with someone because they WANT to be with me, than trap someone into a relationship knowing they don’t really want to be with me. That’s just humiliating! And I really don’t see the point of being with someone just to be with someone. I’d rather be single than be with someone because I didn’t want to be alone. Relationships are much more fulfilling when you’re with the person by choice and not by circumstance.
That’s right, Kitster. And who demonizes singles? Little twits who flash their engagement rings and have expensive weddings. Look at me! Look at me! Somebody loves me! Then they’re divorced five years later with 2.3 squalling brats. Mister finds himself a little Pillsbury Dough Girl to make him happy while bitter Missus hunts for a new baby daddy.
Recently, I heard of one desperate young lady (looking for a new baby daddy) who had marked ‘her territory’ by posting a selfie of herself on Fartbook and making remarks FOR her clueless hubby-to-be, like: ‘Oh, you’re such a hottie, you’re my angel…’ and other totally nauseating made-up shit. Now that’s insecurity with a capital ‘I’. If I was that dude she’s with, I’D RUN FOR MY FUCKING LIFE!!!
Women who subscribe to this Bridezilla mindset make the rest of us females cringe with embarrassment. Why don’t you just put out a fucking bear trap instead? It’d be much more subtle.
Yeah I currently have a friend whose balls are quite safe and secure in their significant others’ purse. It’s gross. I used to feel sorry for men who let women do this to them, but in the end I figure if they’re going to let some twatwaffle control them to the point where they let their significant others completely control their every move, they deserve what they get. And when there’s a kid in the picture – well it’s pretty much a lost cause. This same situation happened to me a few years back. Friend was having problems with their partner, so they had all the time in the world for me. Once things got back on track in their relationship… well, let’s just say it’s clear no time is to be had for me, anymore.
In the end, I’ve realized that men who date insecure women want the adoration, are completely spineless (and probably insecure, themselves) and will completely abandon their friends because insecure women don’t WANT their ‘man’ (and they always refer to their partner as ‘my MAN!’) hanging out in situations and with people they can’t control and I just write these ‘friends’ off when they start bailing. And when things don’t work out or the road is rocky in their relationship and they come crawling back, I tell them to go screw themselves. I have no time for these assholes who think I’m an expendable friend. I have plenty of friends who are coupled who don’t ditch me when they enter relationships, so you can’t tell me that this is acceptable behaviour (I’ve never ditched friends when I was with someone, and it’d be a HUGE red flag if a partner tried to control and manipulate who I spent my time with).
You’re absolutely right, Kitty.
In all the years I’ve had a partner, I have never neglected my friendships, especially with my single friends. I treasure all my friendships, male and female.
especially now eh TTFN, having a handicapped partner must make it much easier to go out with yer friends. Just prop him up on a couple of pillows & a “see you in the morning’ dear” lol
But seriously, I believe most people who have reached 20+ years of life have had acquaintances who have either dropped “friends” after having met a significant other, or seen them cock/pussy whipped .
Kinda sad , but happens all the time. Never quite understood why people let that happen, whether they no longer feel they have enough time , or just have moved on . Those who feel their partner is somehow cheating on them just because they are going out with friends, without them ,very sad. Glad I don’t live like that.
Wow, points for sensitivity there, Bore. You’ve hit an all-time low. A Grampie Gary low – does ridiculing the disabled make you feel better about yourself or what?
Douche. Giant.
he’s a more-on. and confirms it with every word. disgusting.
From what I read OB you were flashing your ring around and blatting on about your news. Did you actually ask people if they wanted to see your ring or did you just shove it in their face fishing for compliments? Just as you have a right to your happiness other people have a right to their feelings. The world does not revolve around you and your news. They don’t have to gush over your ring if they truly dont’ feel like it. Some people can’t stand twits who fish for compliments.
I remember when I got engaged someone I didn’t even speak to made a comment about how ‘some people just can’t be alone’. I didn’t even acknowledge that twat. Her issues are/were her own and had nothing to do with me.
BTW I’ve been married for 20 years so not one of the ‘bitter singles’ you reference. Here’s a tip from me to you: Marriage is not about the size of the diamond or the wedding budget. It’s about commitment and hard work. Grow up grow up GROW UP!