So I realize I’m at an age where many of my friends and peers are having children. I love kids, and can’t wait to have them someday. However, what really pisses me off is these bright, intelligent women who have completely lost their sense of self just because they’ve had kids, as evidenced by their Facebook status. “Jane is so excited for Kyle’s soccer game tonight”. “Andrea can’t wait for her little monkey’s birthday party this weekend”. “Julie is sad that Lily has the sniffles”. I don’t care that little Brandon is almost ready to take his training wheels off. I want to know about you – remember you? The person who used to have a brain?
This article appears in Oct 2-8, 2008.
See, the thing is, once you have kids, they pretty much take over your life. Life as you know it will never be the same…now, don’t get me wrong, the facebook status thing is totally annoying. Wether people are talking about their kids or letting everyone know that they’re cleaning their house or whatever. Who fucking cares? I only have a few friends that actually write witty/funny things in their status.They should just eliminate that feature all together.Back to the kids thing….you don’t lose your brain when you have kids, but you do lose your sense of self. Sure, you can plan a weekend away or a night out with the girls, but even when you’re not with your kids, you’ll be thinking about them and how everything you do could affect them. You’ll see!
Hey, I’m the person who posted this.I totally get that when you have kids your entire world changes. But I’m not sure I agree that you need to lose your sense of self. I have lots of friends who have kids who are still very capable of having an adult life as well. But like I said, I don’t have them, so I can’t say for sure. I’m just going on what I know based on my group of girlfriends. And I’m not talking about the people who occasion post about their kids on Facebook. I’m talking about the ones who ONLY post abut their kids. Whose profile pictures aren’t of them, they’re of their kids. The ones who have forgotten how to be women with independent thought, as well as mothers.
Speaking of that stupid facebook feature where you type in your current status, I find it totally annoying, as if we’re all dying to know that Mrs Fudge ‘can’t wait till Friday!’ or that Gloria is breaking in her wedding shoes by wearing them while vacuming the house! Are you Angelina Jolie? No? Then who gives a flying fuck!!! ‘A can’t wait to have a big crapper, but his mother won’t let him off the phone so he’s sitting here typing on LTWWB!’
i don’t mind seeing what people are doing i just hate when someone tells their life story in their status or says something like “nobody message me, my life is over” when really they just want someone to message them and ask them why their life is over
and as for no profile pictures of anything but their kids …I know for myself that having the baby I so proudly display on my facebook took a real toll on my body and I would rather people see what keeps me from losing the weight I’ve gained then get the “oh my god, what happened to her” reaction I would definetly receive at this current point in time
That’s fair Ipes. I guess I just want to hear about and see my friends, not just their kids.
How, exactly, is your baby “preventing” you from losing weight? Is she force feeding you poutine and milkshakes?
FOFYT
I think it’s a valid question.
Maybe ‘losing your sense of self’ was the wrong choice of words. What I mean is you don’t put yourself first anymore…your kids come first. So, yes you can still have a separate ‘adult life’ but it takes a lot of work and even still, you could be 100 miles away from the diapers and dirty fingers, but they are still #1 on your mind….some people just don’t know how to keep it to themselves and instead share it with everyone via the internet, the grocery store line-up, etc. etc. It is annoying, Sal, I totally agree!You know what else is annoying? When people who have no fucking clue (Frannie) keep commenting on crap they have no idea about. When you have your perfect baby in your perfect world, Frannie, you’ll see how a baby can prevent you from a lot more than just losing weight. Like, you will HAVE to drive everywhere because by then you may not even be allowed to own a stroller! And, losing baby weight isn’t only about not eating poutine and milkshakes….fuck you’re a dumb bitch!
I don’t know Lori, maybe you could take your stroller and go for a nice long walk. Get some fresh air and EXERCISE! That should help fight the weight problem. There’s a place in Bayer’s Lake that my friend goes to that has exercise classes for new moms and their babies. None of my friends with kids had a hard time losing the baby weight.
Then again, they didn’t use beging pregnant as an excuse to eat chips and ice cream every day, so they didn’t have 60 pounds to lose.
Woah. That’s nasty. All I meant was that I think it’s sad to see women who were once super independent, bright, and articulate, who are now only capable of having conversations about poopy diapers and breast pumps. There’s no need to get catty.
No, I’m sure no one in your world has any weight problems, because in your perfect world, Franfran, you probably think it’s okay to put yourself first, it’s more important for people like you to spend hours at the gym than it is to spend early bonding time with your baby.You know, there are benefits to living out here in the real world, Fran. Like, when I gained weight with my pregnancies, my partner loved me just the same, and I lost all my weight naturally, in a healthy amount of time. To answer your “valid question” (which is bullshit because in your next post you say ALL your friends had no problems…like it’s easy) Here are some of the reasons you may not have time to exercise and eat healthy when you have your first baby;1) They’ll be demanding your attention constantly.2) They eat every hour.3) They need to be changed 12 times a day.4) They wake you up at all hours, for all of the above reasons and you have to figure out which it is!5) you will be tired as hell…..like nothing you’ve ever experienced before!So, please forgive me, for thinking of you the way I do when you make rediculous comments like “Is your baby force feeding you poutine?”
I’m not saying they lost the weight in 10 days, but none of them were still carrying the baby weight a year later. And for the record, they’re all good parents who are committed to healthy living, so they make the time for exercise.
i exercise every day…you have obviously never had a toddler running around …..and fyi i don’t eat poutine or milkshakes…i do like my chips and pop though…..frannie my dear some day someone will take you out of your “holier-than-thou” attitude (hopefully sooner rather than later) and you will realize life isn;t just black and white …if the world was the way you seem to think it is what a perfect world it would be…..i’m crossing my fingers and hoping that your perfect self steps outside of the box for a minute and you end up pregnant or something else life changing happens to you so that you will have a reality check because we definetly less one-sided people like you around……i could be joining a gym and working my life away but instead i would rather continue to shower that time and money on my son and post thousands of pics of him on facebook
sorry sal….i understand completely the whole baby taking over life thing……..i have a kid and i don’t give my facebook list a play by play of every poopy diaper or spit up …in fact i don’t think i have ever used my status option except maybe for happy birthdays and rips……..babies do take up a lot. and i mean a lot of time and energy but they don’t have to take over your whole life….when a person has to talk about every little thing their kid does they ruin it when some big milestone happens no one will care enough to share in it becuase they are sick of hearing about your new baby
as long as they keep the ickier details to themselves, I’m cool with what people want to tell me about their spawn. because sometiems, I do in fact want to know- as in, I’m excited to hear that my cousin’s new baby said his first word, for example. However, I really don’t need to know that little toddler whosit is constipated/has diarreah/is vomiting things/ whatever. basically if it’s sticky or invovles body functions, it shouldn’t be on facebook- this includes oh-so-hung-over messages.now over to franfran (who btw I’m so very very pleased FranFran took off :)): You. are a total. and utter. TWIT. also, I highly doubt you ahve any friends at all. since you seem to have a perfect world example of how all your friends are so stepfordly perfect in every single way, I suspect your friends are your cats. or possibly your dolls. or the voices in your head.or squirrels.they’re squirrels, aren’t they FranFran?
funny how you people call yourselves so mature but are fixated on frannie, how hard is it to ignore her?Apparently its as hard as ignoring the shit people right about the kids in the facebook status.you people complain about shit that you can just ignore. Its annoying, but then you dont have to have these people on your facebook, they are still your friends whether they are on the list or not arent they?
If we annoy you so much, how hard is it to ignore us? Grow up Homie.
i never said you annoy me. I was referring to the annoying thing in the OP. I ignore most of you wannabees that think your shit doesnt stink.
….”wannabees that think your shit doesnt stink” = Frannie
either way, lori, do you really need to whip the fuck outta the dead horse each time you see her post? we get it, you dont want her style of parenting and her mentality. I really dont care, but man, your good points get lost in that shit sometimes.
Is the Homie asking people not to flog dead horses? This is delicious. I guess we are all a bunch of hypocrites with stinky bums.
I posted my thoughts here first, and on most other threads, where Frannie then comes along and starts calling me white trash of trailer park bitch or single mom on welfare or something else that I’m not, so when I cut her the fuck up please, mind your business Homie. I don’t care if you don’t like it….and neither do the multiple others who bring her into unrelated threads for no other reason than to flame the bitch!
I posted my thoughts here first, and on most other threads, where Frannie then comes along and starts calling me white trash of trailer park bitch or single mom on welfare or something else that I’m not, so when I cut her the fuck up please, mind your business Homie. I don’t care if you don’t like it….and neither do the multiple others who bring her into unrelated threads for no other reason than to flame the bitch!
miles my point is, the people here that complain about others sounding repetitive and shit, like they suggest about me, is the same thing they do when bashing the same people here each time they post..lori, regardless of what Frannie says, ignore the shit if you need to. Is it not easier to look like the bigger person and save the “i cut her up” moments? Its not like you are getting a medal for this and it isnt like she is going to go away….
It’s fun to flame trolls. It’s fun to mock the stupid, prod the pompous, and the bait narrow minded. Lighten up, H-bomb. If you don’t want to join in, that’s fine. But leave us to our mean-spirited fun.
while i get that it is funny, fact is that many of you people do not realize that you are arguing over subjective things and then you have the crowd jump in and go “yeah, she’s right” when in a subjective debate, there is no right or wrong. So really, do you insult the morons or look like cunts with huge egos and a bully like mentality? also, it takes from good conversation that could be had as some of your group of hecklers are articulate and can hold an actual conversation.
oh, btw narrrow minded is also how you appear to be (you as in the anyone that thinks they are always right about an OPINION)
I think we all (well most) realize how subjective this place is. We constantly bitch about things we don’t really care about knowing full well we are either wrong or that there will be no resolution. That’s kind of the way I distinguish bitching from debate. It’s not as pointless as it may seem. Give ‘er a go sometime.When it comes to something worth talking about, and Facebook probably isn’t it, I think you can see people get a little more serious and start behaving a little more like adults.Well, mostly.
if you all noticed it….. then why do so many of you put “you are wrong (insert frannie, kay, me or any that arent part of the ass suck circle of e-superheros).If someone was truly wrong, than the topic wasnt subjective.
I notice that you don’t follow your own advice and just ignore the things you don’t like about this place…..Most of us don’t suck eachothers ass, we just agree that people like Fran deserve to be flamed because they can’t see past their own ego or views. For example, many of us agreed with frannie when she said people should wait until they’re ready to have kids, it was all of the ridiculous ways she defined it afterwards that made everyone flame her. If you can’t see that then you are either blind, can’t read, or just as fucked as she is!
Amen Miranda (oh wait, did I just suck her ass? I can’t tell…)Listen Home-ster, for the love of god, you are NOT the person to scold us all for hijacking or going off topic. as hey, you have a tendancy to pull threads back to your talking points (cough cough games cough cough), or better yet, to tell us all how narrow minded we are, how we exclude people, how opinions are subjective (thanks captain obvious) and how we’re all so very very mean, us in this little clique (um, is there a clique? I wasn’t informed…..and I don’t think you can be in a clique unless you’re informed of that fact…possibly in quirky memo form. with clipart),onwards: yes, opinions are subjective. but this board would be no fun at all if we all stuck to the no-one-can-be-wrong way of thinking. in fact, you’d be remarkably silent if you couldn’t start a post now and again with a ‘you’re wrong you crazy bitch (seen it)’, or hold so steadfastly to your points, refusing to bend, that while you only rarely actually say point blank that you’re right, everyone else is wrong, we can all infer that from your ceasless deadhorse abuse with poor grammer.yes I said it. poor grammer.the point of this of course is LIGHTEN THE HELL UP. this is a bitch board. there are no rules beyond the mob- it’s a sink or swim sort of place. EVERYONE get’s flamed now and again- I’ve had it for rants and spacing myself, and I dare you to pick one of this little ‘clique’ your brain has manufactured who hasn’t been. if you don’t like it, get out of our juvinile little sandbox.I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again- LTWWB is a childish sandbox in a playground of mean. you can either jump in or you can be the cat shit hidden under the sand.
*Holds up a sign which reads…. “GO HEDGY GO!”
Well this is fun. To be fair, I have certainly noticed there is some ass sucking. Most of it I would think could be reasonably called “having friends”, foreign as that may seem to some. (Though I get that e-friends DOES seem foreign to some, including me, but I accept it.)But some of the ass sucking is so glaring that it can only be deduced that certain poster(s), having just read “how to Win Friends and Influence” people, appear to have studied the comments section carefully for a time before coming in and totally inhaling huge loads of methane straight from the bungholes of those they noted were most popular. Always agreeing, never disagreeing, always siding with, always attacking the same perceived trolls, never quite seeming to think critically and forming their own opinions. I always thought this sort of obsequiousness should be readily transparent to the recipients of the e-rimjobs but they either don’t notice or have an unspoken agreement to soak it up without comment.I’ve never gotten on board with the Homie bashing. I understand where it comes from – damn you can be fucking stubborn! – but it seems personal, and I don’t see the point of getting personal with strangers.I’ve gone at it with kay – but while she and I will never win a BFF award, I still back her up when I agree with her. It’s on a case by case basis.Frannie – well, Frannie is just a shrill, repetitive, brittle and shallow parrot, and really has never offered anything of substance so I can absolutely get on board with telling her to STFU.
You are absolutely right Jammie. I agree 100%. Have I told you lately how smart I think you are?
You complete me Miles. I think you are probably the only person on here who is smarter than Miranda and Floyd. I sure wish I could be your e-friend.
Chester = Miles Spike = JammieChester: You and me is pals ain’t we, Spike? Ya wanna go bury bones? Do ya, Spike? Huh, huh? Do ya?Spike: N’ah. (Smacks Chester)Chester: N’ah, ya wouldn’t wanna do THAT. Ya wanna go beat up a cat? Do ya, Spike? Do ya?
Jeez Jammie, after reading that youse guys might have reverse roles…
You make me laugh Floyd….Have I told you lately how funny you are? And smart too…I’m talking Jammie/Miranda smart, not just regular smart.
I had never heard of Chester and Spike before. Good find.But there will be no burying of bones. Miles is sweet and all but I’m just not into him that way…
I am honoured to be included in this trifecta of intelligence. You guys are my idols. Don’t tell David. He thinks he’s the smart one.
You are all too kind, but thanks… there are a lot of great minds on here,, that is what keeps me coming back… That and the trolls…But for those not fortunate enough to be brought up on Warner Bros in the sixties… these are the funniest cartoon dogs of all time: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Spikechester1.jpg
Man I so loved and still love those cartoons. Remember that cat, can’t think of the name of the bugger, but he always acted like a bum of a cat and his speech was slurred like he was always drunk. That cat slayed the shit out of me, still does.
I think you mean Sylvester the Cat…. That Mel Blanc was a genius of voices… and the full orchestra… Wow.. They sure don’t make them like that now…
Nope don’t think it was Sylvester, the one I’m talking about was a different color, always being found in the garbage can, Jesus I wish I could remember the name. Talked with an almost hiccupie kind of lilt in his voice.
Do you mean Hana Barbara’s Top Cat?http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GdQMImu8YYg&feature=related