Dear Mr Elf Man,
You take my money every time I go to pay for parking at work. I say hello and you say nothing. I say thank you have a nice night. You say nothing, you don’t even smile. You just put on a sour face and hand me my ticket. If you hate your job so much you can’t smile at your customers find a new job!
—Meh!
This article appears in Aug 20-26, 2009.
Maybe he doesn’t hate his job. Maybe he just hates you.
Calling someone Elf Man would definitely get you a stink-eye and no response to exaggerated pleasantries.
Hahahah, I’m so glad that this post was tagged with “Grumpy Elves”. This has totally made my day.
An Elf man in a box. That sound so familiar…
MILK, yeah, you need milk to make him snap, crackle and pop.
No, you guys, seriously. I know who they are talking about. He looks like the leprechaun from those bad horror films. An amish leprechaun at that. I’d hate my whole life if I were him.
An Amish leprechaun? Where?
It would be so cool to lay bets on who can make him smile.
A “You’re welcome” would be good too
Go to the parkade at the regions largest health care centre and you shall see. Oh you shall see. I bet he’s un-laughable….
Gulp, I think I know him. Does his name on his tag start with A?
That Elf asked me to dance at a staff Christmas party (different job), many years ago, then he professed his undying love for me. Shocked the hell out me. Same M.O., never smiled, rarely spoke, just did his job, day after day.
I know who he is too. Wears suspenders and usually has his bible in hand. Poor fella, needs to find himself a good Amish lady.
Maybe we could set him up, put a profile on Plenty of Fish for him. Any ideas on what it would say?
“Socially awkward , bible toting, keebler elf seeks anything with a vagina. Please no heathens or fat chicks.”
from his demeanour and lack of happiness sounds like this guy already has a wife 😉
Maybe he wishes he was baking cookies in a tree stump.
Plenty of Fish ad:
Christian bi-racial Elf/Leprechaun male seeks female counterpart. Nymphs and fairies need not apply.
Never saw his bible–maybe he found religion later in life. But, he was married.
Maybe it isn’t the same elf. After all, my elf loosen up after a few drinks :). I mean, he still didn’t smile, but he spoke–boy, did he let loose! = )
N2theA:
Hum ‘Jesus Loves You’ or some such thing as you pay and see if you get a response then. Either that or slip him a pint 🙂
HKM, You just made my day. I’ll let you know how that one flies! Any bets on what he’d say?
I am probably too late to warn you now (it just occurred to me):
Proceed With Caution
Flying religious tracts and lengthy sermons up ahead.