I have been looking back on my life as a whole and always thought of myself as someone who was victimized by my peers, especially growing up, and was bullied on. I am now realizing my slate may not be so clean, and that I have bullied and judged myself. To you who I judged by a look or said something cruel in earshot of my unsuspecting victim; to my school peers I hurt by joining the group of taunts; or the person with a disability I stared at; for the vague and insulting status that could have been and might have been about you; to those who felt insecurity by me and people who felt at all intimidated or insulted by my presence: I am sincerely and truly sorry. I hope you can take consolation for how you were treated in knowing I try every day to be a better person and to put more love now into the world then I did hate in the past. I am sorry you fell victim to my ignorance and cruelty. You are beautiful, and I am full of regret for filling you with any feeling that you may not be. —Keep Shining Bright
This article appears in Jul 4-10, 2013.
Very few people have a clean slate, OP. If there is to be an accounting at the end of the day, I hope my wrongs will be attributed to stupidity, not malice. Who you were is not nearly so important as who you are now and it sounds very much like you are on a good path. Stay strong.
12 step programme for Haters Anonymous?
Anyone who’s ever been to the microcosm that is ‘school’ can certainly relate.
It can be just as rewarding and beneficial as cruel and unusual.
I shudder when I think about some of the things that I’ve done and had done to me….
but as Ivan alluded, they all kinda balance out.
Damn hormones… they make people do crazy things.
I think maybe this is better put in the love the way we love section.
Op we’re all jerks. The only difference between you and most people is that you not only were openly a jerk, you openly apologized for it.
That makes you better than the rest of the jerks out there who fuck people around from the shadows like rats shitting in a corner of your basement that see themselves as saints because nobody has caught them yet.
Sorry, but HOW is this a “bitch”? To whom are you bitching OB? About what are you bitching? Why the fuck aren’t you bitching OB – ‘CASUE IT’S A BITCH BOARD not a boo-hoo-i’m-sorry-for-being-human-and-now-that-I-have-a-yoga-course-under-my-belt-that-I-see-Life-in-a-diferent-way-and-am-wasting-the-time-of the-bitch-board-reviewers board. Right?
First off, stop punching yourself in the face repeatedly. The past is just that, the past, gone, finished, adios, left the building. Concentrate on what you can do in the here and now instead of having this unnecessary pity party of one.
Excellent retrospective OP. You can’t undo the past but you can learn from it and it seems you’re doing just that.
Love The Way We Reflect