Savage Love

Q I am a pretty handsome gay (I have been told) and I am dating a gorgeous man. I am 34, and he is 31. I am bottom only, and he is top only—so it’s a good match. He seems sincerely interested in me and we are talking about being together. But here is the […]

Q In a frank exchange early in our courtship, I told my girlfriend that I have no kinks. As a faithful reader of Savage Love, I’m obviously not opposed to kinks—but I’ve never had any inclinations in that direction and am probably a typical hetero vanilla. As a result, I’m damn near clueless in that […]

Q My only child is 16 years old. He was curious about sex from a very young age and very open with me, so his interest in sexual matters gave me ample opportunity to talk with him about safety and consent. He went through a cross-dressing phase when he was small—mostly wanting to wear nail […]

Q I’m a 25-year-old woman currently in a poly relationship with a married man roughly 20 years my senior. This has by far been the best relationship I’ve ever had. However, something has me a bit on edge. We went on a trip with friends to a brewery with a great restaurant. It was an […]

Q I’m a 22-year-old straight male dating a 23-year-old woman. This is by far the most sexual relationship I’ve been in, which is great, except I recently “caught” my girlfriend masturbating with her roommate’s panties. (She knew I was coming over and wanted me to catch her.) She has a habit of sneaking her roommate’s […]

I had a blast hosting Savage Lovecast Live at San Francisco’s Palace of Fine Arts. Audience members submitted questions before the show. Here are some of the questions I didn’t get to. Q I’ve been on the dating apps awhile. What’s up with serial first daters? A Back when people primarily met at parties, bars, […]

Q I am a 35-year-old straight guy. I met a nice lady through the normal methods, and we hit it off and have grown closer. I think we are both considering “taking it to the next level.” We are on the same intellectual wavelength, enjoy the same social experiences and have a lot of fun […]

Q My teenage daughter just came out to us as gay. We told her we love her and support her. As a heterosexual, cisgender mother, how do I make sure she gets good advice about sex? I don’t want her learning from other kids or porn. Do you know of any good, sex-positive advice books […]

Q I’m a lady considering taking on a foot fetishist as a slave. He would do chores around my house, including cleaning and laundry, and give foot rubs and pedicures in exchange for getting to worship and jack off to my model-perfect feet when I’ve decided he’s earned it. Am I morally obligated to tell […]

Q My brother just broke up with his girlfriend for the second time in eight months. They had been together for over two years, and she became pretty discontent when she finished college and my brother entered law school, because all his time and attention weren’t revolving around her. In January, she staged this bizarre, […]

Q A few years ago, my dad was busted by the cops for using an online forum to solicit escorts. The arrest and infidelity destroyed his marriage to my mom. My brother and I were in our mid-teens at the time and were angry enough with him that we asked him to not seek custody. […]

Q I’ve been wondering: Since there are lesbians out there who occasionally crave cock, does the reverse also happen? Are there gay men who occasionally crave pussy? —This Possible? A There are gay men who watch football—hell, I have it on good authority that some gay men play football, TP. So anything is possible. (Also, […]