- “Just working on my fitness”
I think we all knew this was coming—-Jersey Shore‘s Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino will soon be making an “appearance” in Halifax. A mere $25 will get you into Pacifico’s “White Party” on May 6—-and $85 dollars will get you into the “VIP” Capitol Room, where the man himself—-no doubt tanned, buzzed and resplendent—-will be IN. THE. SAME. ROOM with “your own private DJ.” Sounds like a sexy situation! (Check out the Ticketpro link here.)
Now, listen—-I watched the shit out of Jersey Shore this past winter. And I loved it. I loved it the same way I love A & W Teen Burgers: Both are quick. Both are tasty. Both are kind of sticky. Both are very satisfying diversions. True, it may leave you feeling dirty and disgusting afterwards, but the feeling passes through your system shortly and ten minutes later, you find yourself thinking “I need another delicious oily burger/episode” and your hands start shaking.
But will I be shelling out $25/$85 to be in the same bar as the man who once mused, “Shave last minute, haircut the day-of, maybe some tanning and the gym. These are rules to live by”? No. And it’s not because I think it’s stupid or a rip-off (although it is important to note that for $25, I could purchase approximately fifteen Teen Burgers.)
No. The reason is very simple. No Snooki, no dice.
Evidence in video form below:
This article appears in Feb 25 – Mar 3, 2010.
I call my gut “The Crisis”
This is the funniest article I’ve read in a long time.
ahhhh jeez.
for 85 dollars he better be giving out free drinks, (and Teen Burgers), and do a dance, sing a song or both or whatever. shooot. and im talking like a routine. with back up dancers, strobe lights and a live LION! (and a birthday cake. we’re gonna act like its my brithday, and a suprise even tho we know its not.) and then i want my $85 (in american funds, to complete the Jersey Shore Experience.) back as a thank you for showing up and supporting 😀 (it is my fake birthday after all.)
I think there should be a Canadian version of this shit show… Instead of greasy Italian stereotypes, think angry Russian stereotypes. In Winnipeg. We can call it Portage & Main Shore.
This is like right out of “Entourage”, but our little hick town version.
LOL @ Snooki. She makes the Dome look like Buckingham Palace.
PS…
nice tits.