El Toro ™ by Hallmark, I love your goofy plastic nose ring, your curly brown hair atop a red furry body.
I love the giggles I get when I push the concealed button in your teensy little brown foot and you say “My name is El Toro. El Toro of LOOOOOOOOOVE” in that horribly bad Spanish accent.
You are truly the best cheesy Valentine gift I have ever received. —And I Love the Person Who Bought it for Me (Almost) As Much
This article appears in Feb 25 – Mar 3, 2010.