Gentlemen: If you are wondering why you are date-less on Saturday nights here’s why- If you can’t take a lady out and offer to pay for her meal (and yes I can afford to pay for mine and yours too) and chances are the next time I will (IF there is ever a next time) general consensus among the ladies is……if you can’t pay for supper on a first date then what are you going to be like in 5 yrs?
There is no excuse for cheapness! ALSO On the top of the list is bad clothes and bad shoes! Even if you have a stellar personality and a million dollars in the bank and a hot sports car if you can’t treat your girl with some class and respect WHY would she ever date you again?
And lets not forget checking messages on your Blackberry not cool! Perfectly tucking curtains in so your last weeks visitor can’t see in your windows? Just plain BAD!
Do I want to go 50% SURE, after I order the most expensive Lobster dish on the menu and excuse myself to the ladies room and call a cab! —You get what you pay for!
This article appears in Nov 18-24, 2010.
_Ladies_: If you are wondering why you are date-less on Saturday nights here’s why- If you can’t take a _gentleman_ out and offer to pay for _his_ meal (and yes I can afford to pay for mine and yours too) and chances are the next time I will (IF there is ever a next time) general consensus among the _gentlemen is_……if you can’t pay for supper on a first date then what are you going to be like in 5 yrs?
There is no excuse for cheapness! ALSO On the top of the list is bad clothes and bad shoes! Even if you have a stellar personality and a million dollars in the bank and a hot sports car if you can’t treat your _boy_ with some class and respect WHY would _he_ ever date you again?
And lets not forget checking messages on your Blackberry not cool! Perfectly tucking curtains in so your last weeks visitor can’t see in your windows? Just plain BAD! Do I want to go 50% SURE, after I order the most expensive Lobster dish on the menu and excuse myself to the _men’s_ room and call a cab! —You get what you pay for!
Equality’s a bitch, eh OP?
God I’m glad I don’t follow your advice. My boyfriend has cheap shoes (loves his sneaks) and we always went 50/50 when we were dating.
I agree with the Blackberry thing but have no idea what you’re talking about with the curtains.
You order lobster for spite? How does that taste?
Now, 15 years later he makes way more $$$ than me and pays for most stuff and more importantly we’re happy and we don;t have running tally of who paid for what.
You’re not looking for a “gentleman” you’re looking for a bank machine.
Where do you insert the card?
This bitch is all over the place. And by that I mean it’s barely coherent.
Egads woman! What kind of low life scumbags are you dating?
Back in the early late upper paleolithic, it was standard operating procedure to pull out all the stops as you hustled your ass around the bases on the way to home plate.
An expensive meal at a posh restaurant was de rigueur on the first date.
Good grooming, nice clothes and stylish shoes? Of course! What man would put any less effort into impressing his new found squeeze?
I’ve been ‘off the market’ for lo these twenty-seven long, long years but after all the horror stories I hear I think I should maybe open a ‘school of dating for men’.
wow… you are practically a prostitute. Love the sense of entitlement too.
Its 2010….. While I wouldn’t ask you to pay my share and i might “offer” to pay for everything, I believe a first date is a dutch experience. You are meeting and deciding if you want to get together again. If you don’t then guess what…. its a waste of $$… sorry hunny your companionship for a few hours on the possibility of another date isn’t worth it. Eating out is expensive and paying for dinner just to learn your date is a money grubbing self absorbed person gets old fast.
Once you are in a dating relationship its nice to treat each other etc… I pay, You pay.
Good luck on finding someone desperate enough to lavish you with everything your heart desires. I hope they can say “pre-nump”
OP you’re not dating a man like Commandant says….and it’s your own fault for choosing him.
Devil_girl….love your comment. Me and my BF always went date for date with paying….and it was never about can he afford me…it’s about who he is….Now it’s our money….so it doesn’t matter who covers the bill.
Op, your bitch is completely unintelligible. Yikes. Maybe dude decided you weren’t worth the money.
Geesh, entitlement! My bf and I usually take turns, way easier than counting out the pennies. Not like it matters though either way in the end.
I noticed she signs off “you get what you pay for”. I hope they get some sweet poon tang after the bullshit they had to put up with at dinner…then they can sneak into the bathroom and call a cab.
I don’t believe in the man having to pay for the woman on every date– it should alternate. But IMO, the one who initiates the date should at least offer to pay for both meals. I don’t know about the rest of you, but if a guy asked ME out to dinner and asked ME to pay for my part, I’d be totally turned off and there wouldn’t likely be a second date. But if I ask HIM out, I’d pay for both of us for sure.
KillBrindiAlready… I’ve mentioned that all women prostitute themselves one way or another….man does that ever get the female bitchers here hoping mad ~:)
stir…stir…stir .
The is a certain segment of the female population that are just looking for an ATM machine with a dick. They never see the potential of anyone, just what they are lacking. Thankfully, I didn’t feel that way about Hub-Unit when he walked into my life 28 years ago. He was unemployed, his clothes had seen better days and he lived on pizza and Keiths. But I knew he had potential and he proved me right. You can’t always judge a book by its jean jacket.
Treat the date like a financial investment opportunity…only put money in if you know you’ll get a return on investment. Otherwise, do dutch.
I agree with going dutch in most cases, but if a dude is really into a gal and would like to maybe pursue something or just wow her – or even just being a gent – then him picking up the tab isnt a terrible thing. Most of my dates have been dutch but if I make a point to ask a gal out for the evening and take her on the town then I will happily foot the bill.
I asked her out afterall; we didn’t just come to each other and agree to have dinner. Maybe there is a difference between a ‘date’ and two people just ‘doing something together’.
More – There is a biological imperative for women to naturally be attracted to men who can support them and their offspring…. so it can be inferred that women “give it up” when they have gained an advantage….ie food/shelter/protection.
however the wonderful thing about humans is they have developed the ability to evolve beyond those biological urges and function in an enlightened sort of way.
In the same way that today men who “metaphorically” bash women over the head and drag them back to their caves/dark alleys and have their way with them are rightly vilified, Women who expect men to lavish them with objects simply to be worthy of their time, should be scorned and dismissed as shallow and self centered and not worthy of having a real relationship.
that being said….. if a woman chooses to sell herself for objects and the man is aware of the score and voluntarily enters into such an arrangement…. I have no problem with that.
Just be honest about who you are and what you want…. there will always be men out there looking to complete the business transaction.
‘KillBrindiAlready!’ – oh, honey, that moniker just made me sputter a can of Pepsi through my toenails. Fucking A.
question! when she bends over is there a place to swipe the credit card? just woundering cause thats the type of girl you sound like.
KillBrindiAlready….lol.
I think the guy was testing the douche and she failed miserably, thereby saving himself of weeks or years of grief.
OP, you’re the type of woman 99% of men hate. Enjoy being alone for the rest of your life. I guess you might have a couple failed marriages in between now and death since you value money more than passion/personality.
The only reason men are “supposed” to pay for dates is because men were the big strong bread winners who had jobs while the girls stayed home and cooked and cleaned and looked pretty earning zero dollas. You could argue that if you really support the idea of gender equality, you should be prepared to ditch the old norms that only became traditional because of inequality in the first place.
Women have jobs now, horraaaay! So pay for your half! I always assume we are going half and half, unless a guy insists that he’s paying after I take out my wallet. And I don’t get angry if a guy wants to pay for everything! It’s not sexist to offer to pay for a girls meal, it’s just being extra nice. I’ve actually offered to pay for my dates’ meals before but so far no one has taken me up on it, one guy even got offended… oops
Wow OB, you sound so…professional.
snoop – you beat me to it, again, I should get home earlier 😉
Something tells me the OB also thinks of herself as a feminist.
if that is the case baby, then iyou would owe me your fucking life. dinner at about 100 bucks and whatever else. yeah, i see you drooling now.
What is the OB doing out of the kitchen, and speaking up? You should know your place too!
You ask, you pay. Simple rule. If a guy asks me out, he should pay. If i ask, i get MY wallet out.
The being treated with class and respect…sorry, Hali dudes- you don’t. You either want a gf and ANY girl will do, so you cling to her like wet pants, or you just want ass, and will try to say whatever.
Worst date ever- drinks at a popular downtown bar. The bill came, i noticed the glance he gave to me. He was the one who had insisted on going to this bar. He then asked me to pay for my drinks. I had no problem with this, cause it was at this moment that i decided i was never seeing his ass again. $20 worth of drinks, how cheap can a guy get? It wasn’t a $100 dinner. I would have insisted on paying some in THAT case.
An hour later, he told me that most of his dates were only out to “see what i will buy them.” Why, thank you for lumping ME into that category! I never asked him to pay for anything (he did a great job of doing the asking himself)
Do I need to do this again?
“$20 worth of drinks, how cheap can a guy get?”
“$20 worth of drinks, how cheap can a _gal_ get?” <-- "gal" here = you, Rawr ^^^ Both of these sentences make the same amount of sense. Also, you balked at $20, and we’re supposed to believe you would have been happy to pay 50? Sure……
Funny thing is, it’s incredibly obvious your date was NOT lumping you in with the other women he mentioned. He was basically giving you praise for not being part of that group. Oh, but too late—you had already finished judging him and weren’t expecting any compliments. He will have to keep looking for his modern woman, and you will have to keep looking for your caveman.
Regardless, if you don’t want to put on your big girl pants, and instead expect someone to pay for you, will you please at least clear it up BEFORE you go out doing anything that involves a bill?
Damn, Suckers, for $100 you better get your meal and then an open-leg buffet lol
Hey, Rawr, wanna go for a few pitchers? Holland-style of course but one round is on NGF! 😀
I don’t mind paying if the girl’s hot and likely to put out. If the girl’s not that attractive and/or unlikely to put out, then she can pay for her own fucking meal!
This is most mens’ rule of thumb, by the way, whether explicitly stated or not.
Dogma. way to show off your literacy skills. I said when the person does the inviting. He did the inviting. And, believe it or not, there IS a difference between $20 and $100! It’s called “math”, it’s taught in schools EVERYWAY. Goddamn that newfangled education!
rawr, honey, if it was you i was going out with, 100 bucks would still be a bargain. watch out for the suckster tho, i hear he can be pretty sezual.
Math tells me $50 > $20.
Can you understand how it’s hard to believe that someone who doesn’t want to pay $20 would be willing to pay $50?
Literacy tells me we are using the word “date” here, and not “escort”.
In the latter, the expectation that one person is paying for everything is there. In the former…no, and someone wanting to play by escort rules should at least clear that up ahead of time. Is that unreasonable?
TL;DR
“I’m a spoiled bitch”
OP’s a shallow bitch, but I do think a guy should have some class.
Don’t get me wrong though, fuck you OP.
lol qpmz…
If it’s just sex you’re looking for it’s probably easier and cheaper to just go downtown and pick up a drunk chick.
I hope I never date you 😛
TTFN. We have something in common. When I first met my wife-to-be, I was unemployed (laid-off) moved back with my parents to save money and worked odd jobs.
She new I had potential and she didn’t doubt me one bit that I could rise from the ashes.