OK Agropur, you huge bummer, you’re laying off hundreds of Atlantic Canadians who work in the dairy industry, and you’ve just acquired Scotsburn Dairy so I’m sort of scared shitless that you might decide to axe the wonderfully bizarre, borderline offensive person who populates the Scotsburn Dairy twitter account (@ScotsburnDairy, please smash follow with the quickness).
But surely there are other places to cut costs, because the belly laughs that this totally bonkers twitter feed affords us are priceless.
Have a scroll through my top 11 Scotsburn tweets and promptly give this person a raise.
Hey HOUSEWIVES!
Ladies, rejoice when your #manmakesdinner and serves up #ScotburnIceCream to thank you for all you do, and to celebrate #housewifesday! pic.twitter.com/K9SgIpqVzO
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) November 3, 2016
Housewives be fat.
Celebr8 #NationalSandwichDay & #NationalHousewifeDay with this low fat treat from #Scotsburn https://t.co/ri9ugk0kJK pic.twitter.com/3Bh8aHdstI
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) November 3, 2015
Aunts and uncles just don’t get the appreciation they deserve.
Use this #cofeemilkshake recipe to treat your #Aunt & #Uncle as a thanks for all they do 4 U https://t.co/AIHqiHHJQB pic.twitter.com/I6rdY6flGG
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) July 26, 2016
Bubba.
It’s #LeaveTheOfficeEarlyDay, so get your #Bubba and treat him to Scotsburn’s version of #RockyRoad; #HeavenlyHash. pic.twitter.com/BwVuyKoJl7
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) June 2, 2016
UM.
Its easier to talk about difficult things over a bowl of #ScotsburnIceCream. #BellLetsTalk #MentalHealth #4UAndMe pic.twitter.com/k639Qwwm3v
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) January 27, 2016
UM?
Sending thoughts & prayers for those in #FortMacMurray; hoping it’ll rain to put out the fires & hide their tears. pic.twitter.com/lDTVb89U4L
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) May 6, 2016
If you begin to want to vacuum or sweep.
Its #NoHouseWorkDay. If you begin to want to vacuum or sweep, seek the cure- a spoon & bowl of #ScotsburnIceCream! pic.twitter.com/KZ6Wj58qwX
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) April 7, 2016
<3
Have some #ScotsburnIceCream to put a smile back on your face. It’s #GetOverItDay!#SomethingBetterIsAroundTheBend pic.twitter.com/wZJsSDeJte
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) March 9, 2016
Let’s get this hashtag poppin, everyone: #NoTrouble4That
Its #BackwardsDay! Enjoy a bowl of #ScotsburnIceCream before supper. What favour will you have? #NoTrouble4That pic.twitter.com/0VIW4eJJaN
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) January 31, 2016
Ow, I bet they hurt their arm with this stretch.
It’s #SeafoodBisqueDay. Finish with these ice cream truffles using #ScotsburnDeathByChocolate http://t.co/Nv9l9yY5TW pic.twitter.com/IcsrzcZDET
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) October 19, 2015
The best for last. The tweet that started it all. A love affair that only grows more passionate by the day.
Get together with friends to share a milkshake made with #ScotsburnIceCream & reminisce about #TheDayTheMusicDied. pic.twitter.com/MDZpTBtTXj
— Scotsburn Dairy (@ScotsburnDairy) February 3, 2016
This article appears in Jan 5-11, 2017.
