I don’t know what to do. My husband is bi-polar and it’s been tough since we came to N.S. 10 years ago. I have MS. I set up a small business when I found out. I recently had CCVSI and will be walking again soon. Amazing. Problem is, last time my husband was manic, he really hurt me, physically and emotionally. I can’t believe he would hurt me. Now he doesn’t work and I’m supporting us both. I just feel numb. I can take care of myself but he can’t but I need a break. —sandbag026
This article appears in Nov 17-23, 2011.
Dump him?
It’s not your job to take care of someone who hurts you in any way, shape or form. Is he getting treatment? Sounds like he isn’t — if he can’t get his shit together enough to get treatment then that’s on him.
Mental illness, especially treatable ones, is no excuse for harming another individual.
You need to get rid of this shit sack. He’s an adult and should be able to take care of himself, bi polar or no bi polar.
You deserve much MUCH better than this, OB. MUCH better.
I suggest staying with a friend or relative and don’t tell your husband where. If that’s not possible, there’s women’s shelters in town you can go to. If your husband does not have access or will not take meds for his condition, then you should not risk your life by staying. You’ve just received a reprieve (hopefully) from MS – if there was ever a time to get the fuck out of there, it’s now.
http://www.motifake.com/image/demotivation…
Physical and emotional violence are dealbreakers. There are no second chances. Life is way too short to go through it unhappy. Better to be on your own than tolerate this. Trust me. Find a safe way to leave, but leave.
The violence is only going to get worse. Get a lawyer, file a report that documents it. Dump him and run, don’t look back, save yourself.
…following zZz…
http://www.cartoonstock.com/lowres/ggm0711…
Your husband is sick and needs help, and I wonder if he is getting it. The both of you should not be using his illness as an excuse for him hurting you. If he is hurting you and unable to work as a result of choosing to not seek treatment for his illness (which I realize is not a cake walk in this province) then I think you should consider the idea that your needs are just as important as his. A relationship is supposed to be equal, not one person just draining the other. Right now it seems as if you are putting up with this because you would feel guilty if he was left with no one to “take care” of him. My advice (since I’m obvs not an advice professional) is to seek a consult with a mental health counselor and/or a domestic violence counselor. Good luck, and congrats on walking soon.
I agree with Mole Rat OP, seek advice from a mental health professional, and/or domestic violence counselor. You may find the answers you seek there. A lot of them are very easy to talk to, and there may even be group therapies where you can find people in similar situations.Good Luck OP and also congrats on walking soon!!
OP, he needs help and more than you can give and offer him. You also need a break, and perhaps a permanent one from this man. Bipolar is a very serious disorder and needs serious treatment. Seek help as soon as you can. The mental health mobile crisis team (MHMCT) is always an option if you don’t want to call the cops if he is violent toward you or himself. They can also help with persuading him to seek help, and in the short-term it may give you the break you need (permanent) to get away.
This made me laugh. Sounds like the perfect reality show for local cable.
Sadly, mental illness takes a larger toll on families then does physical. Because it is invisible. Get the fuck out! Now. I ‘ll carry you out my self and kick him for you.