South End Car Alarm

For nearly a week now, a car in the south end area (around Lucknow) has had it’s alarm set off over ten times a day. Everyday varies with when this obnoxious clown-horn sounding alarm echoes throughout my street and my home. At occasion, the deafening blare only vibrates my brain for thirty seconds – in others, it easily plays on repeat for the same duration of “American Pie.” In this short amount of time it’s taken me to transcribe my woos to share, the FUCKING alarm has blasted not once, not three times… no, but rather FIVE TIMES.

I put up with the drunks, screaming children, barking dogs, entitled neighbours, speeding cars, constant jackhammer construction and house parties all year long due to this location. I’m only complaining about one damned car alarm that wont stop screaming for attention. —Migraine Plagued

This article appears in Aug 3-9, 2017.