The time has come for revolution! I issue this call of arms brothers and sisters. We need to rise up against this menace, this tyranny. We need to let Bobs/Bluebell, Murphy’s on the Water and anyone else who has paid for that godforsaken hold music that we’re mad as hell and we’re not going to take it anymore! —Vladimir
This article appears in Feb 2-8, 2017.
Here’s a phone app:
Instead of music on hold, place all the folks on a chat line.
They can then shoot the shit until that agent comes back from coffee…
I make up lyrics to those banal little tunes. Most of them composed with four letter words.
“menace”,”tyranny”….OB, exaggerate much?
FUCK, try the phone company with their Haygood Hardy from 1964 for mind numbing. Talk about wanting to go thru the phone and tear someone a new A..hole.
Put the phone on speakerphone and masturbate. Slowly. Start with tickling your anus.
I DON’T KNOW WHAT WE ARE YELLING ABOUT
Are we talking about that amazing 80s synth holdover music everyone in this city has, with the little piano melody? That music used to be the one good thing about being stuck on hold with NS Student Loans. Transports me to a simpler time. I’m not talking about the Cisco call manager hold music with the clap sound which is also a masterpiece.