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To the crew of drunken dudes chanting “Hey! We want some pussy!” in unison outside my building at midnight on Saturday: I assume you were on the way to the bar seeking vaginas with deludedly high hopes of intercourse. You may want to consider that those vaginas have real human beings attached to them, and when you assemble in ape-like packs chanting occult hymns of sexual objectification you create an aura of female repellant that hangs over your every encounter with a human female that might otherwise be interested in you. —Rudely awakened
This article appears in Aug 27 – Sep 2, 2015.
I think they know that…
Was it Frosh week?
That’s when you start throwing cans of cat food at them.
Are you sure they weren’t Wiccan allies, celebrating the autumn harvest by expressing their respect for the fecundity of the womb.
Love frosh week, so many young ‘uns.
Sounds like the midnight serenaders are members of the “Most Men Are Pigs” fraternity. A lot of guys get their PhD in this. Wasn’t one of their ilk just on tour promoting his misogynistic philosophy in Montreal and Toronto?
Yes Oceanchick, and some women get degrees in misandry.
Are these witch vaginas?
Probably some frosh virgins who have never been out from under the watchful gaze of their helicopter parents before this week. That first taste of adult freedom is a little too much for some of their coddled brains to comprehend.
A few months of being rejected by every manner of woman they encounter will set them right.
Indeed, frosh week in full force.
I’ve lived near universities and I’ve lived in sketch-ville.
Honestly, I prefer near the loud, idiot kids over the sweatpants baby-mommas with thug, thieves, and drug dealers.
I’m surprised that the OB seems to have missed the key fact that the charming young lads’ serenade is actually a lyric from a very famous (notorious?) song by the now-legendary 2 Live Crew.
Not my fave, but definitely one of those “campus classics” that gets dusted off and thrown back into the rotation year after year.
OB should brush up on the last few decades of pop music so she could at least recognize the references now and then.
Sincere gratitude to Your Modness for removing my comment in response to that “other” one.
Mine was, admittedly, somewhat on the vulgar side. The “other” one was beyond the pale and not acceptable in any space, even this rowdy room we all call LTWWB.
You’d be shocked how many girls don’t give a crap and go for those guys!