Moving day is a lot of work and very stressful for all parties involved. I get it. Going back to school and facing the end of summer. Also stressful, I get it. So you have a few drinks and relax a bit – cool. Making it a complete bender and grabbing onto that last bit of tanned (soon to be melanomic) flesh maximally peroxided piece and get yourself both some – fine. Not really my thing, but fine. Just draw the line at doin’ it in my backyard at four in the morning – or anytime of day, really. Your pale, white, bare, fat asses are meant to be kept indoors; or, at least out of sight. Sex outside might be fun, but next time I can plainly see and hear unattractive (you were) lewdness, I’m throwing used kitty litter out my window at you. No joke. It’s biodegradable. Consider yourself warned. —Catty Lady
This article appears in Sep 1-7, 2011.
I’d suggest filming them with your camera, then yelling: ‘IF I SEE YOU OUT THERE AGAIN, I’LL BE UPLOADING YOUR UGLY WHITE ASSES ON YOU TUBE PRONTO!’
So you wouldn’t have a problem with it if you found them attractive?
Do you live in a flat, OB, with multiple units sharing one backyard?
Not saying that’s an excuse, because if you don’t and it’s your private backyard than that makes it a whole lot worse!
Dang, the best sex I ever had was on the way home at 1 a.m. and screwing away on someones chaise lounge in the south end of Hali………I still feel guilt when the owners say hello as I somehow think they know…….argh!
lol finally a proper Friday bitch.
“Just draw the line at doin’ it in my backyard at four in the morning – or anytime of day, really.”
There we go, it feels like Friday again.
I’d dispense with the threat and go straight to youtube! Classy!
lol or RedTube or YouPorn
lol I would have snuck up behind them trying not to be seen or heard, stood there for a sec and been like “excuse me sir?” really loud, dude probably would have shit himself. If I wasn’t trying to sleep that is. I wanna know who wrote this bitch
Really you couldn’t just walk away from the window and let them have their moment. Instead want to be the “mature” person and throw cat litter at them.
Sounds like you’re the one in need of sex, and making remarks about someones body type sounds like you’re trying to feel better about yourself.
Sad really
kitty baby, is this your bitch? catty lady,hmmmm,i likes it, i really likes it.
I’ll bet that if you report a couple having sex in your back yard to the police, you would have about a 2 minute response from them.
Nope, not my bitch.
My back yard consists of rocks. Probably quite uncomfortable for fucking.
lol good point GV. I wanna post that clip from the simpsons
“don’t run away… continue swimming naked.. ah crap”
Nah Beener, fuck that. It’s my property, if anyone is fuckin on it I better be getting mines first! I pay rent pretty much for the sole purpose of having a place to do that sort of thing, so should everyone else, or at least use public property, not my private property. I don’t wanna step in someone’s juices.
And if OP has kids or pets that play in that yard I totally understand where they’re coming from. It’s not a stretch to imagine that someone who has to use someone’s back yard for sex might have some disease that can be passed on in bodily fluids. I’d say that particular group of people might be considered high risk.
—–kitty baby, is this your bitch? catty lady,hmmmm,i likes it, i really likes it.—–
You like this Bitch, or do you like the hot fuck PK is going to lay on you, Gary?
You’re getting creepier by the week.
She’s. Not. Into. You.
I need to go wire-brush my wang now.
rocks can be fun, for getting yours rocks off on. and wheelie, didn’r ever occur to me.
I would have pissed on them. I’m not kidding, I’m a sick fuck.
I am gonna mention the same idea as i had for the person that had someone crap in their yard…..its time to get a water sprinker system that is triggered from an inside switch or valve
or you could do what a buddy of mine did. he was on his way home, and walkng thru fairview cemetary. this pair were going at it on a flat stone, and he snuck behind a large one close by. guess he reached out and smacked the guy hard on the ass. he said the guy jumped up, and started running, as if satan himself was chasingg him. girl was still lying there wondering what the fuck, when my buddy comes out with” get off my fucking grave”, in a real low deep voice. she also fucked off in a hurry. dam, i would have loved to seen that. he said he got about 200 bucks from guys wallet. served the asshole right, for fucking on someone’s mommas grave.
Fuck, Sucks, that tale (tail?) made me laugh my lower back cheeks off. Good one.
Instead of kitty litter, why not a bucket of cold water ~;)
that wouldn’t make a mess, & would probably ruin the mood ….lol
Bucket of cold water is just a poor man version to the sprinkler idea that i mentioned so that you for acknowledging my genius.
Mimicking sex noises can be fun or blasting out of your speakers that ole 70s French chestnut, ‘Je T’aime’, complete with cheesy male vocals and lots of orgasmic gasps and groans before the female singer trills like a fucking dentist’s drill – a true classic.
until we build my treehouse, i wouldn’t recommend doing the wild thing in our yard
i will get righ on it p.g.,if not sooner. if you hear sawing and hammering tonight, don’t call the cops,tis only moi.
OP, call the cops. NO one needs to see fat asses.
OB, one of my buddies wants to know where you live so he can come over and enjoy the show =)
You could always give them ‘direction’…
http://www.bloomingfaeries.com/comics/2011…
http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcR…