Myself and some of my friends work in hotels both here in Halifax and in various provinces across Canada. It seems when people go on vacation they leave their brains, and therefore common sense, at home. We figured we’d pass along some helpful hints to you. We understand you’ve often been stuck in the car and/or on a plane and are therefore a weary traveller. That, however, does not give you a free pass to be a jerk.
Here are some helpful hints for staying in hotels:
-We are not a glorified babysitting service, please do not let your children run amok and expect us to know where they are. Likewise, hotel furniture and luggage carts are not playground equipment.
-Keep your room doors closed at all times. Hotels are not liable if you cannot be bothered to keep your doors closed and locked.
-Please wait to ask questions until after we’ve gotten you checked in. We will infact answer all of your questions about our hotel without you having to ask. It’s part of the required check in process. After that if you have questions go ahead and ask.
-Sold out means we’re sold out. Really, it does.
-Being polite with the front desk staff will get you further than being an ignorant ass will.
-“The signs outside say I have to pay for parking. Do I really?”. Um, yes. Yes you do.
-If you are calling a hotel in Canada the price given will be in Canadian dollars.
-Standing at the desk and bouncing back and forth when checking in asking “Who wants me?” doesn’t amuse us as much as it does you.
-We don’t just dole out free upgrades. If you want the upgraded room you have to pay for it. Period.
-No you cannot hangout and drink in the lobby. The lobby, kind sir, is a public place. The last time I checked you couldn’t drink in public.
-If you encounter a problem during your stay please let the front desk know right away. Telling us at check out does nothing. Letting us know in advance gives us the chance to fix the problem. Waiting until you leave does not. And don’t expect a discount of any sort if you can’t be bothered to give us a chance to rectify the situation.
-Do not show up at the hotel at 9am and expect there to be a room ready for you. People are still in the rooms and rightfully so until check out time. Yelling and screaming and cursing will not work.
Anyway, we really do want you to enjoy your vacation, however being a tourist doesn’t mean you get to be a moron. We realize we can’t make everyone happy, but we do our best to ensure the vast majority of you are. Just please do not leave home without your common sense. —Hotel Staff Everywhere
This article appears in Jul 21-27, 2011.
Holy Crap I love this post.
I worked in Lake Louise at one of the finer hotels…. not the one in the village, the one on the ‘hill’.
A few other quotables from tourists….. mostly from the ignorant fucks to the south would be:
– Q: Is that [price] in American? A: Uh, this is Canada Mame/Sir, the prices are in Canadian. (insert back turned eye roll)
– Q: how is it you keep the water in the lake so blue? A: That’s an interesting question. Every fall we drain it and paint the bottom…. not really.
– Q: What do you do with all the wild animals in the winter? A: Ahhh, Very good question! We round them up and store them on the 10th floor dining room. (note: a tourist actuall came back with buddies in the winter and found this to be untrue, stay and air fair comp’t…. employee fired).
Q: Do you sell Film. A: No. (I worked at a retail camera film store and standing at the counter in front of a 6′ display of various types of film).
Q: Do you sell Stamps. A: No, but we rent pigeons. Q: Rent? A: well, they’re homing pigeons to you have to take them with you and when you get home they fly back here. (working at the Post office at the time).
In my experience, the richer the tourist the more ignorant they are.
All in all though, fun times. And a great place to work.
SO, SOOOO true!!! .. I work front desk at a hotel as well and I get these exact same situations. We have a revolving door that has a mind of its own, small children think its a toy and make a run for it.. I have about 5 – 10 heart attacks every week from this. While the parents are just standing with their backs turned having a conversation with friends.
When I ask “How would you like to pay for your room” I often get “Oh, I have to pay?” or “I’d like it for free” and being the nice front desk agent I laugh when in the back of my mind I think.. If I have to hear this one more time I’m going to pull my hair out.
Excellent bitch! I travel frequently and stay in hotels and understand how busy the staff is. If there’s a problem with the room just call the front desk and talk to them. In my experiences the staff was always more than willing to help things.
I too have had the pleasure of working at a resort in Banff. A common question there is “Can we pet the animals?” or “Can my son ride the elk?”. People seem to think “National Park” equals “Petting Zoo”. For awhile I’d just explain that no you can’t because they’re wild animals blah blah blah. Eventually I started responding with “If you don’t like you children go ahead and let them pet the animals”.
I’ve often been heard telling guests (jokingly of course) to be nice to the front desk staff as we control whether or not you get a room!
One of my favorites: guest approaches desk and says “Mr. Smith”. Thats it. Nothing else. Um, so are you Mr. Smith? Are you looking for someone staying here by the name of Mr. Smith? Are you checking in? Out? Up? Down? What, in the name of gawd, do you want? Articulate people! We’re not mind readers.
We want to help and we are there to help, but for the love of gawd please use your common sense when you’re travelling. It will only make life easier for you and for us.
Hotel lobbies are not public property, just saying.
If these people are so stupid, and you’re such a fuckin’ whiz, why are YOU are working a counter or desk while THEY are vacationing. Guess they get the last laugh…
If everyone took their vacation at the same time Guy, not one person would be working. I think it’s a great thing that the human race staggers their vacations so we’d have someone to service our needs. Hey… when you go on vacation, are their people working where you go to do whatever you do?
OP chances are the bad apples you’re talking about don’t act any differently when they’re at home. I’ve found that you can’t turn off and on bad manners.
Um, actually hotel lobbies are considered public space when it comes to liquor licensing in most cases. I’ve worked for several properties across Canada and have yet to find one that the liquor license states it is OK to consume alcohol in the lobby.
Jus’sayin.
… ok let’s do the illegal test. If the police saw you doing it: “drinking in a lobby” would they join you? … chances are … no, no they wouldn’t. Alors yeah. That’s how I guage my illegal activity, haha.
ok, well if they saw you drinking in a bar while on duty, I doubt they’d join you then either…
unless they’re looking to get fired.
as far as turning manners on and off… complete agreement there.
Location does not an ass make.
Shhhhhhhhhhh shhhhhhhhhhhh my reasoning is not sound … I know. I like to think they’re not on duty. This is a very loose rule … I may not have been in the … best of *cough* states while adopting that one, but I’m sticking to it! 😀
true.
and to further shatter it…
cops get busted all the time for doing illegal things… so they’re usually not the best examples.
the laws they’re meant to uphold.. maybe.. though I really don’t think all of them should be as they are so….
really I guess it just comes down tot he moral compass.
can you live with the consequences and accompanying potential media article if you get caught? and can you live with yourself if you don’t?
0 = no, 1 = yes
INPUT | OUTPUT
A B | A AND B
0 0 | 0
0 1 | 0
1 0 | 0
1 1 | 1
Oh mai Jesus, you’ve made me sad. Your superior reasoning has killed my drunken reasoning. I’m just gonna go eat my lunch burger in the corner while I use the salt from my tears to add flavour.
*sobs quietly*
As previously stated, I worked front at the Holiday Inn in Dartmouth, just off the MacDonald Bridge.
My favorite one is when people are shocked when they are told that they have to pay for the night up front. Do they not realize that if we don’t get the money up front they could easily sneak out and never pay us? Policies are in place for a reason.
I’d rather sit in front of a computer any day. At least I’m sitting and don’t have to stand for 8 hours straight in uncomfortable dress shoes.
Best response OP is to kill them with kindness. The nicer you act, the stupider they look. I was in the business for 10 years myself (got out–tg). And before you get all down on American travellers, US service people don’t love Canadians because you undertip compared to Americans (Here’s an old joke: What’s the difference between a canoe and a Canuck? A canoe tips).
I beg to differ about the luggage trolleys not being playthings–I have had a lot of fun on those things! I have also:
run aluminum trays through the dishwasher to heat them then waxed with candle stubs, and used them as sleds on Mt. Mansfield, Stowe, Vermont
made boats out of wooden salad bowls and candle stubs, letting them float out onto a spring-fed pond in Vermont, skinny-dipping and drying off with tablecloths;
Sucked all the nitrous out of whipped cream canisters;
taken several naughty pictures from some asshole who was a jerk all night and left his camera behind at my restaurant;
Anyway, if you mean to stay in this business, learn the difference between monkeys and lions.
OP, have you shared this BITCH with the hotel manager, or the CEO/president? I suggest you do. I’m sure they’d like to hear your suggestions for customer and service. If not, then fuck off and get back to work. The reason why you work at Front Desk is because you don’t possess the necessary education to make decisions within the company. As long as customers are paying, the hotel will accommodate them to the best of their ability.
you must be my age xeno
HRmet, uh, forget it. *glides hand over head* whooooosh
Sounds like you work at a Motel 6.. any decent hotel I have stayed at, they offer free upgrades… The Motel 6 getting an upgrade from a double to a queen, they would charge. Go get a real job. Decent hotels also have bars in their lobbies… And the lobby of a hotel is no more a public space than a bar.
thanks for the mention of the tip thing xeno. There’s actually a good question on how much tip (if any) if considered normal in various places since that varies a lot from country to country.
@sebastian_ I’m not really sure where you have your information from but just because people are working at the desk doesn’t mean they aren’t educated. I work at the front desk but I’m in the middle of studying to become a chartered accountant. And oh btw my MANAGER posted this on our memo board after I showed it to her just because of how true it was. On another note, sometimes we give free upgrades, not for no reason at all though. If you just come in and want a suite for the standard room rate we’ll say no more often than not. We might give you a discounted upgrade but you’ll pay something for it.