Drunk chaperones

Parents of NS: When you send your kid on an overnight field trip, I hope you don’t expect that their chaperones are actually looking after them in the hotel. As a hotel night clerk with many years of experience, I can tell you that nine times out of ten, the so-called “chaperones” spend the evening getting embarrassingly, staggering, teenager-grade shitfaced in the hotel bar, while the kids are left to their own devices in the rooms. Luckily teenagers themselves these days are a bunch of nerds, so we don’t get a lot of noise complaints (at least until the bar closes and the rowdy, drunk-ass chaperones go back to their rooms) but you may want to consider asking in advance which if any of the chaperones is planning on staying sober and, you know, actually watching your damn kids for you. As it stands, the parents are by far the worst part of any school group. —Just Send The Kids By Themselves Next Time

This article appears in Apr 19-25, 2018.