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This advice was unscientifically gathered from men and women ranging from 21 to 49 years old. Some were looking for quick hookups, others a relationship, some both. Whether you want to clean up your profile or give online dating a try, these pointers can help you better navigate today’s virtual
meat markets.
The Bad Profile Picture
Whether you’re opting for a conservative headshot or posting swimsuit photos, make sure your photos are right-side-up. Just like poor grammar and typos, upside-down photos send a message. “It isn’t hard to figure out how to turn a photo and it shows either laziness or low intelligence,” says Richard, 49. Other common grievances include Instagram filters, photos taken at angles that purposely hide the face or body and photos obviously taken in a bathroom—especially selfies. “Do you really not have anybody else in your life to take a picture of you?” asks Rebecca, 29.
First contact
If you’re trying to avoid the generic “hi cutie” or the creepy “DTF?” message, make sure your profile gives people something to work with; list some interests or experiences you’ve had. Even Tinder users complained that the site’s tiny profiles meant they didn’t have anything to talk about before or after their hookup. What you shouldn’t write in a first message, says Vivien, 21, are things like, “Do you have a taste for dick tonight?” or “Do you know how many fat chicks I had to plow through to get to you?”
Nudies
The vote is split on this one. Some people have no problem sending an intimate picture to potential partners for inspection. Others wouldn’t send one in a million years, even to a long-term partner. “Not that I am not proud, but because I think it is ridiculous, childish and degrading,” says Richard. So if you want to send or receive these pictures, a good rule of thumb is to ask first. Nobody likes to have a stranger’s junk sprung on them as soon as they open their inbox.
The Cheesy Username
Remember that your username doesn’t just describe you, it will also define the kind of people who click on your profile. “If it is overly sexual, I assume the woman is super-desperate, or it is a fake account,” says Matthew, 40. Implying sexual prowess is generally seen as tacky and unappealing. “That’s your perception. Shouldn’t I be the one to tell you that?” asks Rebecca.
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This article appears in Feb 12-18, 2015.
TABS bitch about online dating write ups:
Don’t have a standard write up, here’s what a large portion of profiles contain, I pretty much instantly rule these ladies out. A lot of this stuff is fine, but without having other stuff to make yourself sound unique, you’re leaving me to go solely on looks, which I simply won’t do.
“I’m easy going and love to laugh. I think laughter is the cure for everything. I go to the gym a few times a week to stay in shape, an active lifestyle is important to me. The beach is my favourite place to be in the summer. My family and friends mean the world to me and I don’t know where I’d be without them. I absolutely love my job and am super ambitious and would like someone who has goals in their life. I have an eclectic music taste and will listen to anything! I love to travel and am always planning my next trip.
Also, sorry guys, but if you’re looking for a hookup, move to the next profile. Thanks!”
1) Everyone loves to laugh
2) Stop pretending you love your job. I’m sure some people are genuine when saying this, but it just sounds so fake.
3) The beach, family and travel thing are in 95% of girl’s profiles, not unique.
4) Might as well not say anything about music if you “like it all”, which I also doubt.
5) The hook up this is fine, as from what I’ve read/heard, it can get intense as a female.
Add some substance, there are many profiles that are completely different from what I wrote above, which is what I look for. Mind you, this is just me, I’m aware of many dudes who don’t read profiles and go solely on looks, and maybe some people are looking for these basic things. To me, these profiles don’t sound like you’re being honest with yourself.