The bartender tells me Fridays and Saturdays are the busiest
nights. People drink lots, ’cause they are doing the karaoke.
Laurie the Guy hosts 300 karaoke shows a year; he’s done it for 18
years. His first time onstage, at Big Leagues, he was totally sober—a
sure indication he was born to sing in front of a TV.
“Half take it seriously and won’t drink, the other half, well, I’ve
had people pass out on stage in front of me,” he says. The Guy doesn’t
care about serious singers or drunks. He says he’s had ECMA and Juno
winners in front of him. Not impressed.
“I’m more interested by the way they present themselves on stage,”
he says. Great singers who just stand there are boring.
Laurie says he sings for other people. And plays guitar. And mouth
organ. And comic bits. And segues. The Guy has his bits down. He
doesn’t like doing the same song all the time. He likes the challenge
of a new song. How many songs do you know? “I know half of the lyrics
to all of the songs and not every word to any song.” Oh yeah, he says
everyone forgets how the bridge goes, too. That’s what’s so good about
Laurie. He just wants you to perform.
Tonight at the Lion’s Head, Bette Midler brings down the house. Two
tough guys sing a smooth R&B duet to their ladies. A kid raps “The
Real Slim Shady.” A moustachioed man who looks like a cop brings down
the house with a rap hit. People reveal essential bits of themselves
onstage. Everyone finishes their songs beaming.
“Nothing’s going to fall out of the sky if you get it wrong. It’s
all about entertainment, who cares if you sing good or not.” Shhh. I
don’t think the bartenders want to hear that. Beer sales would go
waaaay down.
Other Karaoke joints
Mike Gough puts on karaoke at Big Leagues (4 Forest Hills
Parkway), the Parkside Pub (14 Highfield Park) and
Dave Doolittle’s (90 Tacoma Drive); there’s Mimi’s famous
karaoke at Bearly’s House of Blues and Ribs (1269 Barrington)
and Wednesdays’ Kamikaze Karaoke at the Menz Bar (2182
Gottingen). For a full list of song pits, visit thecoast.ca.
This article appears in Mar 12-18, 2009.
