A Two weeks ago, I announced I would be taking a nice long break from questions about miserable sexless marriages. (I don’t get questions about happily sexless marriages.) I tossed out my standard line of advice to those who’ve exhausted medical, psychological and situational fixes (“Do what you need to do to stay married and […]
Dan Savage
Posted inLifestyle
He’s not an AIDS monster
Q I am a straight, married, 38-year-old woman. My husband and I have two children. I have been with my husband for 12 years, married for six. Three years after we were married, we found out that he was HIV positive. We had both had multiple tests throughout our relationship. Both of us were negative […]
Posted inLifestyle
Happy underpants pervs
Q I’m a straight guy, married for 16 years, kids in school. My wife cannot find a way to be intimate with me. We’ve had therapy individually and together. I nearly divorced her, but we decided to stay together—we do love each other, and the economics and child-rearing favour it. After I asked for a […]
Posted inLifestyle
Negative convulsions
Q I am a cis woman in my mid 20s. I get a pang or a spasm of pain in a place deep in my clit/urethra area. I can’t pinpoint which part exactly. It takes me by surprise every time it happens, so I jerk around and press my crotch for a hot second—which doesn’t […]
Posted inLifestyle
Ready to cheat
Q I’m a gay man who is ready to start cheating on my boyfriend. We’ve had a wonderful 3.5-year-long relationship full of respect, affection, support and fun. I love everything about our relationship, and our sex life was great, until he moved in, eight months into the relationship. At that point, he lost all interest. […]
Posted inLifestyle
Defining the boundaries
Q I’ve been dating this guy for almost two months. It’s been pretty good, except the sex isn’t really the best. I have this other male friend who has had a crush on me. Long story short: My friend made a move on me the other night. I told him I couldn’t, and he knew […]
Posted inLifestyle
I fell for my FWB
Q I’m a 26-year-old single bi woman. Sometimes my roommate/best friend and I have drunken threesomes with men. We’ve had some great one-night stands (less scary with a friend!), but recently we slept with a man I’ve been (drunkenly) sleeping with over a period of months, my “friend with benefits.” I shared my FWB with […]
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Cheer up, sad mama
Q My son, who is almost 30 years old, was married four years ago. He just shared with us that for the last three years, he and his wife have been practicing polyamory. They are committed to their relationship but have each had relationships with both men and women. We are trying to get our […]
Posted inLifestyle
Tie me up, leave me be
Q Is it legal for a man to procure the services of a Dominatrix? In the kind of session I have in mind, there’s no nudity or sexual activity or contact involved. There’s not even any whipping or flogging or caning or hardcore BDSM stuff. I just want to see what it would be like […]
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Kinky queries
Q I’m confused about my sexuality. For many years, I thought I preferred hetero-romantic asexual relationships. Exposure to select reading material—thanks to my gender-studies classes—has me convinced I’m an asexual t-type (“top,” but I prefer not to use such connotative terms) female who is attracted to slight and feminine men. I do not want to […]
Posted inLifestyle
Boys, boys, all type of boys
Q I’m a woman in a straight relationship. I woke up this morning, and my BF wasn’t in bed with me. He felt ill in the middle of the night and went to sleep in the spare room—where he found a condom in its wrapper behind the nightstand. Now my BF thinks I’m cheating on […]
Posted inLifestyle
Kinky romance
Q I’ve been reading your column for awhile, and you always advise kinky people to go seek the same within the kink community. But in my experience, the kink community is very “sex right away, get to know you later”-oriented. I have two questions. First, as someone who’s a bit old-fashioned, is there somewhere I […]