OK, it’s time we did the right thing in this so-called multicultural society. Have a truly multicultural festival. Let’s get the Christians to admit it, Christmas as we practice it is NOT christian at all. So enough with the Jesus is the reason for the season shit. He’s not! It’s corporate America that is responsible.
This is the season that literally makes or breaks businesses. Don’t see anything that a Savior of the world would want to claim as being responsible for. Quite the opposite.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I do not believe in discriminating against any religion, at all. But Christmas has become a cultural holiday, NOT a religious one. Now for some, Old Christmas is celebrated in early January. And I do believe that any scholar will tell you Jesus wasn’t born on Dec 25 anyway. So a reasonable choice if I were an actual Christian (not a go to church twice a year variety), I’d concede. Give the culture Dec 25th. Let them enjoy a non-religious winter holiday. Keep Santa, and the tree/presents, and get rid of any religious references at all (no offense meant to any Wiccans or others who might revere the notion of Santa as a fat fairy/elf). But let those who actually revere the birth of Jesus, celebrate in January, without the materialistic, overindulgent process we go through every year. In other words, try being faithful to what the true meaning is supposed to be. People might actually take you seriously then. —Ho Ho Hold it Right There

This article appears in Dec 13-19, 2012.

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66 Comments

  1. Reply

  2. Or, keep Christmas in your own way and let others do the same.
    In short, mind your own fucking business and concentrate more on actually doing some good , if that is in your heart, than on getting your ass-grapes in a twist about Mangers in public buildings and being wished “Merry Christmas” by people maxing out their credit buying shit manufactured by Chinese slave labour.

    And, by the way, feeling the need to include this little gem:
    “Now, don’t get me wrong, I do not believe in discriminating against any religion, at all. “
    puts you in the same ballpark as those who say:
    “Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not racist/sexist/homophobic…Hurr Durr”
    Get the picture?

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  3. Too true OP. Christmas was highjacked decades ago and turned into a celebration of greed and avarice. I dislike what Christmas has become, a season for stressing about getting that special toy for your children, competitively decorating because Johnson down the road has three spotlights, eight wreaths and two million lights, getting bombarded by charities trying to guilt you out of that last nickel and IT GETS DARK AT 4:30!!
    I realize that has nothing to do with Christmas but the tilt of the planet’s axis and it’s odd elliptical orbit.Still though. I do like the music and the food and the get-togethers but, please, leave the robotic march to the tune of almighty corporation.
    ..and the chocolate orange PG! ahahahaha

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  5. uhhhhhh rabid lover of chocolate oranges here…….toss a few my way, i could use the extra calories. hahahaha

    just celebrate whatever you want, in the way you prefer.

    and dec 21st is very good, the sun starts coming back around earlier. i don’t get ‘sads’ but i can’t start morning walkies til dawn, and it’s cutting it pretty fine before work in these last weeks.

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  7. Christmas can jam its own treetop up its woody, ringed arse. I love the holiday spirit and our family proved last Christmas it can be done without a shred of commericalism. Best of all: no window envelopes in January demanding your payment for all the shit you couldn’t really afford.

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  8. Christmas stopped being about religion when children were taught to expect presents on the 25th. Just like Easter stopped being religiously relevant when people started going with the story that a magic rabbit breaks into your house and leaves chocolates laying around.

    It’s clear that someone somewhere said “We can’t possibly expect kids to believe this religion shit. Lets apply presents and candy so we can subtly push religion on to them”.

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  10. Who cares. Religious, or not religious. It has been adopted by the “christians”, and is celebrated by “christians”. Christians have just as much right to celebrate Christmas as anyone else. If they want to put a religious spin on it because it makes them feel better. Who cares? We live in a “tollerant” society. If you want people to be tollerant of you and your beliefs, return the favour. Tollerance works both ways!

    This message is brought to you by the most non religious person, ever.

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  11. As Ivan said, Keep Christmas in your own way, I don’t over complicate it, I have a few drinks, spend time with my kids and wife, give a few presents, the time off work is what I enjoy the best.

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  15. For the past couple of years I’ve been posting this video, at this time of the year, and this is probably about as good a time as any. We seem, as a species, to be incapable of making major course corrections in our destiny, but occasionally, individuals can make minor gestures that re-affirm our humanity.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9coPzDx6tA

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  16. I’m gonna try my hand at homemade eggnog…
    Something tells me that the non-commercial stuff can hold WAY more rum because it’s seasoned to taste…

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  19. That’s how Seal 6 found Bin Laden. They had Oxfam send him a goat with a GPS implant.
    This has been Ivan Sonofabitch, and now you know the rest of the story.
    >: )

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  20. snubiz, i would sure like you for that!

    i have a small number of people that still require ‘gifts’ so i donate kuranda beds to shelters in their areas.

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  25. hahahaha that one and the wilson one. warms the cockles of me ‘eart.

    ‘gyp religions’ hahahahahahaha

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  26. No they didn’t Zedman. Can anybody tell me why, class?

    All: “Because they didn’t want the cunt to find it, Mr. Sonovabitch”

    Co-rectum-undo >; )

    Nice one Painey. Me Old Dad’s getting the book version with instructions to read it aloud on Xmas Eve.

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  27. Just use the holiday to do something fun, something good, and do something for others. Keep it simple. Buy into the hype or don’t – the choice is yours.

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  30. hey holiday nazi. I celebrate festivus. Who cares that hardly anyone else does?

    What, are you trying to corporatise holidays now? Why don’t you just let people celebrate what they want how they want instead of imposing your will on everyone? I mean, what are you trying to do? Change the law so nobody can celebrate anything that isn’t a non-denominational sanctioned holiday?

    Fuck you. If you’re ever in power, I’ll celebrate on your front steps every year and then pee on your “happy non-specific winter-themed holiday” sign.

    Sorry.. this is tradition for my people. Just ramping up for the Airing of the Grievances.

    December 27th.

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  31. “Keep Santa, and the tree/presents, and get rid of any religious references at all (no offense meant to any Wiccans or others who might revere the notion of Santa as a fat fairy/elf).”

    So… let me get this straight. You’re saying, by “get rid of any religious references” you mean “get rid of any christian references” – as immediately after saying that you made an apology to another RELIGION. Even though pagans celebrate christmas in much the same way as everyone else. With presents and santa.

    So ….. you don’t mind festivus then. You just want to pick and choose what RELIGIONS people choose to follow and when each religion should celebrate.

    because people aren’t doing things the way Your Utterly Confused Majesty deems appropriate. The true christians should celebrate in January because, as we all know, the dates are more important than the events. And right before that CONTINUE to have a massive financial blowout in december, just without at least the attempt at all the good feelings and kindness.

    And then they should create ANOTHER holiday in january that will just become another excuse at financial pukery, sandwiched conveniently between regular christmas and valentine’s day?

    Op be honest.. do you work for hallmark?

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  32. Well if the Christmas season makes or breaks a retailer then OB, I guess Jesus is the reason for the season and more importantly the savior of the retailer.

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  33. Fuck you, OP.
    I don’t believe in the manger story and the talking goat(what?!) but I celebrate Christmas. We’re not a fundamentalist country(religiously, that is), but Christmas has evolved, in our pluralistic society to a not-just-religious holiday. Well, not just a Christian holiday anyway.
    And yes, I noticed Holiday- Holy Day. It’s just a word.
    You call it what you want, this non-Xtian will say Merry Christmas and enjoy time with his family, and his beloved.
    PisP

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  34. I could understand the anger if they forced you to have a Merry Christmas, it’s optional, and I love it, but not in the commercialised/stressed way. Celebrate it, or not, in a way that makes you feel good and doesn’t infringe on others.
    Failing that, go fuck yourself.

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  35. Eh. I buy shit for my parents for xmas and my cousin and her husband for Chanukah, I put up a tree, watch Scrooge and I eat me some turkey.

    Then I go shopping on the 27th to get some cheap shit.

    Sounds pretty stellar times to me.

    To each their own, OB. No one’s forcing you to celebrate anything.

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  36. Oh and this year, mom and I are getting drunk on xmas eve to make up for last year’s c-deficile. (dificile?).

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  37. Going to a friend’s place for the 4th year in a row, and doing the deep-fried turkey scene. Mmmmm. Although I think I’ll skip the post feast “bobbing for turkey giblets” this year. It’s not as fun as it sounds….even WITH the burner on low. :S

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  41. there are certain people who shouldn’t cook this way, a basic understanding of physics helps

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  49. can’t post a link from my fb, just got this.

    2 mayans…one says ‘hey, the tequila is ready – want some?’

    other guy walks away from the calendar he is working on, saying ‘sure, if i don’t finish this it won’t be the end of the world’.

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  52. you guys are on your marks today. i’m watching this movie “grandma, grandma, are you spry?” “let me fix you some sandwiches” love the new photo, good dog

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  58. >>all choked up & lost in s&g tracks, cannot believe how much time has rushed past. i had a little blue record player, wrote out all the lyrics to every s&g song on wednesday morning 3am.
    anyhoo, everyone drive safely. a LOT of snow out this way (prospect)

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  64. Christmas only is stressful if you let it be. You think the shopping centres are crazy around here? They’re like that every day in a lot of places, people deal.

    I was in and out in like 20 minutes yesterday and spent like 60 bucks, got 80% of my shopping done. Christmas isn’t materialistic, some people just are. If those people OP refers to who make it a big competition didn’t have Christmas they’d find other ways to play “let’s see who can spend the most money and make sure everyone sees.”

    I really don’t see it as this big corporate ass-raping that some people make it out to be. No one’s forcing anybody to spend a ton of money. I feel like anyone worth buying a gift for isn’t going to expect you to go beyond your means.

    I see where OP is coming from but it’ll never happen and this time of year is a time of celebration for many cultures so why not just all celebrate our traditions privately and try to get along in the meantime? Makes more sense to me than dictating based on your personal ideology.

    Happy rama-kwanz-chinesenewyear-hanukk-mas to all

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  66. Like I said before Happy Suicide Season ya’ll.

    Apparently there’s more suicides in the spring time than during the holidays or winter.

    Who knew?!

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