I am overweight by forty pounds with tits only a huge giant ape would love. So when I visit good ole Sal’s, the only offerings are XL shirts the width of a facecloth or these fucking gaudy wouldn’t-even-wear-it-when-I’m-90-&-blind polyester pieces of crap that are so short, most women like me would look like a bar fridge.
I have to go to the men’s section every friggin’ time but I’m really tired of dressing like my old man. Bastard even steals my shirts and makes the pits smell like five day old sardines fried on dog shit. —I Will Not Wear Clingy Pink Tops For All The Tea In Tattoo’s Hole
This article appears in Jul 15-21, 2010.
I intend to avoid any ‘thift’ stores in future.
lose some weight?
I actually thought this was you TTFN.
I would think thrift stores would carry lots of bigger clothing with so many yo-yo dieters. I feel sorry that you have to go through this. Losing weight is hard.
I’ve been to lots of thrift stores and there’s tons of stuff in XL – not much in small or medium. Maybe you should look t a different store. I hear the VV Boutique in Dartmouth is good.
I remember the days when i was 50-60lbs overweight. Nothing cool fit. So, I decided to LOSE WEIGHT.
Thrift stores go by donations. How much ultra-cool stuff do you think a person will DONATE?
Lose some weight is a good suggestion. If you’re unable to do that, stop shopping at fucking thrift stores. Or do both. The money you save today from not stuffing your face all day with food will surely pan out into some nice clothing in the future.
i thought that was you, ttfn, then i looked at the first comment, damn. that would be a sight i would not want to miss. hello black rose.
As long as you don’t look like those who are featured on the people of walmart website…
Try Frenchys in Spryfield… they have a bin of clothes for large women.
Not at all related to the Bitch, but, NTH, isn’t your avatar a group of Tanuki?
Yes it is Dr. Fever. 🙂 How did you know?
A little film called Pom Poko, and SMB3. Raccoons with giant nuts!
OMG Pom Poko…actually I have never seen it. SMB3…that was one awesome game. I will have to find a pic of one with giant nuts.
Pom Poko is frightening, but since it’s a Studio Ghibli film, it’s acceptable… those wacky Japanese.
“tits only a huge ape would love” Does this mean your tits are banana-shaped?? Sorry, couldn’t help myself, that comment was just too funny! I’m not even going to ask about how you know what 5-day old sardines fried on dog shit smells like! Hilarious though.
Like other posters said, these are donations, what do you expect? Try Frenchy’s (sp?) or hit up Walmart, they often have clearance clothes.
Thrift Store bitch = 6/10 at best… vs. Lack of Puppets in HRM Bitch which = 9.5/10…
The Puppet Bitch rules!!! Whenever I need to cheer myself up I sometimes think of The Puppet Bitch and suddenly mirth ensues. I’m giggling right now just thinking about it…hehehehehe! I love The Puppet Bitch!
So you’re fat and have titties (guys should NEVER have those)….here’s my advice: PUT DOWN THE FORK AND GO WALK!
“Random puppet shows would be breaking out and every shit!”
Best bitch EVER!!
OP: STFU, put the fork down and walk your fat ass over to Wal-Mart instead.
maybe miss maudey could find the puppet bitch to entertain us mere mortals
you could always wear the box the fridge came in instead of raiding the fridge you portly mare. does hubby have a saddle?
I’ll have a look over the weekend, s’ok?
otay miss maudey^^
I’ve never read a Bitch on this site before where I’ve had to self lobotomize myself, take my brain to the nearest Rubber Ducky Car Wash and power spray it for 2 hours straight in order to get a post and the visions it elicited out of my head.
For those who missed it the first time around or those who want to reminisce…voila…the infamous puppet bitch:
“HaliFUCK Culture Scene
Posted on Wed, Jun 10, 2009 at 1:34 PM
What the fuck is up with the culture scene in HaliFUCKS??! Shit! I moved half way cross the country to this fucking city for school, and its deadd! Fuck, where I come from you could sit out front a building and whip out a puppet, and fucking marionettes would gang round from everywhere. Muthafuckers would be whippin off they socks and drawin faces on em to get in on the action. Shit! Man, this stuff went down daily! Round this fuckin shit spot they anint nothin. Nothinn! Fuck! I took my puppets down to fucking Murphy’s wharf and not one fuckin soul joined me! I fuckin had to do Mid Summer Night’s Dream by my fuckin self! Shit, man, back home we used to find a fuckin cardboard box in an alley, cut a hole in that muthafucker, and put on a fuckin puppet show. What the fuck is wrong with you Halifax??!!! Shit, it pisses me off too much to even write bout!
—puppet master”
Thank You OceanLady – That one just never gets old.
Thanks Oceanlady, that was…I don’t even have words for that.
merci mon cheri…perhaps shakespeare by the sea could benefit from his mastery heehaw
“Titus Andronicus” with sock puppets. Eat your heart out Sir Anthony Hopkins.
It’s a beauty for sure! I also reposted it under ‘submit a bitch’ so it can makes it’s second appearance appropriately instead of a hijack on someone else’s thread.
You had me at huge tits…
Ivan – Michael Caine in Battle of Britain? I liked the movie but not a fan of him adopting the plummy Rodney accent. We used to define the toffee nosed as either Rodneys or Daphnee’s in the old days -and the Rodney would be pronounced Wodney as in Monty Pythons Life of Brian.
You got it Baz. Couldn’t find any good screen captures from Eagle Has Landed so I went for the next best thing. Even though it’s not the best piece of cinema narrative wise,(you only know Caine dies because his black lab looks so sad when the rest of the spits land) I enjoy the film immensely. Pre- CGI, real airplanes. The story of how the production team acquired the ex-Spanish knock-offs of Messerschmitts and Heinkels merits a film in itself. Seams that buying weapons from Franco’s Spain in the late 60’s was something that best British bureaucracy had a difficult time dealing with.
Love “Wodney. ” British army squaddies refer to their officers as Ruperts, or if they are supreme twats, Wuperts.
Oh noooo. Ivan-the-eager-eagle-eyer (say it fast 5 times, betcha can’t): I’ve seen naught but an empty pile of twigs in that eagle tree for the last day or so. It seems empty-nest syndrome hath approacheth much sooner than we would like. Have you seen ought?
PS Glad you like the moniker manipulations:) Tres fun!
shit oceanlady the wee one has died…see the exploitation thread…scree^^
I’m so sorry Oceanlady I thought you knew . Phoenix died sometime on Wednesday evening. He didn’t move at all Thursday morning and in the PM he was gone. A message on the main site explained what happened.
Our wonderful friend Paingirl sent an awesome love out on Friday by way of Tennyson. Sad Scree .
How ’bout this heat, huh?
Hot enough to boil a monkeys bum.
just call me cheetah^^^almost cold sudsy time…rawk
I’m chained to the desk at our little emporium for the next 6 hours and the slumlords who own the building have been studiously ignoring our requests to fix the A/C. I can only compare it to being a stoker in an ironclad off the coast of equatorial Africa – with tourists asking inane questions ever couple of minutes. Not even the helicopter rotors from the gulag warehouse could help today. It’s too hot to Rawk.
sorry to hear that…if it makes you feel better we are having sapporo^^^you have sunday off i hope? glugluglug ahhh
You’re an evil woman Paingirl – that’s why I luv ya. ^^ . Enjoy your sapporo. I do have Sundays off and if the weather is nice SOBova and I will be up to our necks in the Lake by 9:00 AM. Its the best time, we usually have the lake to ourselves, the water is crystal clear. Before the Highfield Riveiera crowd show up – and then it’s how long can you hold your breath underwater when the random gunfire erupts. >: )
highfield riveiera good one…we are home feeding the critters and sitting in the jungle that is our yard. please bitchers let us try to keep the commander entertained
Sounds lubberly. The corbies on the grounds of the dacha were just going nuts this morning. The Countess was out on the balcony, hunkered down and trying to look predatory but , mostly just resembling a thrown away Davey Crockett hat with a flicking tail. They’ll get some tasty pork fat and chicken skin tomorrow. Rawk, Swoop & Scold.
it is so funny to watch hookbeak, sue and bob attempting to teach the wee one what is what…he wants to be fed NOW. hey aliens is on^^^
Heh, Heh, Paul Reiser. DIE YUPPIE, DIE! (tr. The Yuppie, The). That’s how Helen Hunt should have killed him in that gawdawful show of theirs. And then Siggy could have killed her. Now thats a final episode. >: )
Thanks for letting me know Ivan-The-Eagle-Expiration-Explainer and paingirl. I’ve been so busy this week that only sporadic attention has been paid to LTWWB posts and I somehow missed the news on this site and the webcam site.
I am heartsick over this after watching the wee one since he was small enough to fit under his Mom for protection. The poor parents must be devastated. Has the cause of death been determined yet? I started scrolling through some of the posts on the eaglecam forum but was too heartbroken to continue.
I am reposting this in honour of our fallen feathered friend. I am heartbroken after watching him practically since he emerged from his egg. Grief is a much bigger beast than empty nest syndrome.
(with thanks to paingirl and Tennyson)
He clasps the crag with crooked hands;
Close to the sun in lonely lands,
Ring’d with the azure world, he stands.
The wrinkled sea beneath him crawls;
He watches from his mountain walls,
And like a thunderbolt he falls.
*sob* thanks sweetie, that poem is a beauty…lamenting our collective loss ^^rooooo
“Thy songs were made for the pure and free.
They shall never sound in slavery.”
Thank you both, my friends. Hurt shared is hurt bearable.
Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Musical translation: Pink Floyd’s ‘Great Gig In The Sky’ (sniff)
Has there been an autopsy? Any word on cause of death?
They sent the body for one. No word yet. I keep going to the site but I haven’t seen either of the adults. The empty nest is heartbreaking enough. I’m a bad anthropomorphiser; seeing one of the parents would put me right over the edge. – Ivan-the Eaglet-Mourner
The website is now saying she died of acute mycotal pneumonia in both lungs. No word yet on how she caught it.
So tragic;(
I spent the afternoon flying my bald eagle kite. First time it’s ever been flown. In tribute to Phoenix…
Scree, Scree, Scree, Ocean Lady. Scree, Scree Scree.