Bitches gotta boot it up to bring it home, push it up, push it out, round ‘er off, shake it all around. What you doin’ boys? You training yourselves to last? You practicing Dan Savages ABCs of cunnilingus? You gonna make sure she comes? You even know what that is? What that looks like? What that sounds like? You not gonna let her fake it to keep you feeling good about yourself? Some bitches know what’s real, and we’re sick of the cop-out. We love the ways of love, and all you little boys just wanna dick around with your little dinkies. Push your trucks around in the sand and call it work. Enough false confidence. Let’s see some real PERFORMANCE boys. —Don’t Wanna Bring Home Any More Chickens
This article appears in Aug 30 – Sep 5, 2012.
Word.
If all you are is a booty call or one night stand that’s all your gonna get I’m afraid. Wham, bam thank you ma’am. You wan’t romance and meaning? Not likely gonna happen when all these guys want is to get their rocks off. So make em wait. But can you?
“Don’t Wanna Bring Home Any More Chickens” ?
That’s on you.
Stop ‘picking up’ in the coop and find a real fucking man-cave to do your hunting in.
Always analyze the kiss. If he’s a shitty kisser, chances are, he sucks at everything else too. Be a boss. Tell him what you want. If he doesn’t comply, hand him his pink slip. Oh, and like RageezZz said…ditch the chicken coops.
Wheels is on the right track. You often won’t get to that level of great, ecstasy screaming, must change the sheets, pass out exhausted on top of each other, sex without putting in time with one specific person. One night stands don’t always allow you to feel the other persons rhythm, making for awkward and sporadic love making. Multiple sessions is preferred.
Find a good boy, train him to drive your vagina, and maybe then you’ll even learn a thing or two about how guys work and then THEY can stop faking it with YOU.
agree with the crunch man. bodies and what triggers ’em are unique, because brains are attached. it takes time and repetition (with thought) to hit all the right spots.
difference between takeout fast food and a 7 course feast. they each have their place, but if you want a feast, you have to make an investment.
I second both the Captain and GDM…
hezz… I think handing him the pink slip in this case is part of the problem their having…
Well! Sounds like no_fool had a lack-luster long weekend.
most males don’t have a fucking clue as to what a female REALLY LIKES. and those that do, they rush the fuck out of it , and destroy any chance of good nookie. the female is a hormonal creature by nature, and if the male doesn’t learn/know/practice, they will be history soon enough. the old suckster knows this very well, and has no problems satisfying his partners.
yes… it’s the initial acquisition that is the true problem for you.
zZzing!
Guess what, OB? Good sex takes two, not just one layin there faking orgasms for the others benefit. You get what you put into it. So, you know if a guy just wants to hammer one out as fast as they can while you lay there like a dead fish, you are might be a bigger part of the problem than you think you are.
Stop messing with thugs and people who call women bitches and you’ll be off to a good start, sometimes you are just as much to blame as the losers you’re hanging out with.
**looking upward at the ceiling** mmm…blue.
Even hookers can be choosy, Zzz. Acquisition is sometimes a problem for the Grey Gooser, hence the road trip last month!
😀
Wp
zZz That initial acquisition is a problem for many.male and female. Last Friday night I went to a pub alone and left alone.I thought about whether or not it was ‘proper’ for a single woman to go to a pub alone to drink,then thought fuck it and went.One year ago I wouldn’t have dreamt of doing that, out of the fear of other’s judging me.I didn’t go there to ‘trap’ I went for a drink.I had alittle fun.
Yeah c’mon guys put your back into it! Straighten those legs but don’t lock the knees, keep your chin level, shoulders down and don’t forget to breathe!
Great sex is like ballroom dancing -it gets better with practice.Caring for the person your making love with helps,any two people can have sex.Seeing the look of pleasure in your loved ones’ eyes can add to your own.
Everybody get your notebooks out, there’s some good points being covered here. From here on out I don’t wanna hear any more bitches about bad sex. We should be able to pool our knowledge to help solve this atrocious problem… Forever!
Boru, good on ya for getting out!
I did as well, though it was for a birthday party and not ‘prowling’…
So yeah, at least you took a stab, good first step.
The hardest part I would imagine about going out alone is that you can appear just that, a loner. I would think you either need to really instigate conversation and keep conversations going… or sit alone and drink and ponder in peace.
I’m really not any sort of authoritative source on this though… just rambling my thought process.
AMEN SISTAH AN’ WORD TO YA MOTHAFUCKIN MOTHER! Dat’s all I been sayin. Ever hear your girlfriends talk…they way us women obsess about men. Oh okay we got a hot date tonight say, we gonna clean up the crib real good, change dems sheets, condoms- check, lube – check, drinks in tha fridge, ooh does he like me, does he think I’m hot, is he turned on by me? Do you think guys be talkin shit like this to their boys? Ladies don’t be such chumps. You get this cocky motherfucker to come over, he might even be packin’ in dem jeans. But he got the audacity to lie there like he ain’t gotta do shit. Expecting endless blowjobs without reciprocating in any way It’s sad really the lousy men out there. Lousy, lazy & SELFISH! They don’t know, don’t CARE how to satisfy a woman. Never learnt shit nor bothered to google shit. And when he gets off – its game over zzzzzz time. You need to sit on dat man’s face or shove his head down or atleast some finger action because it takes a woman a lot longer than a man to O-G. Sex ain’t all about tha dick. It’s about time dudes put in some effort. If a guy just rips off his clothes an’ just lies there like a lump- like come n’ get it baby -I gots no qualms whatsoever about putting my clothes back on and leaving the damn room. Now, blueball motherfucker, whatcha GON DO??!