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Fuck you, oven. When I set you to 325, I mean 325, not 450. You burn everything and set off my overly sensitive smoke detector. Its getting irritating having to mess around with cooking/baking times and temperatures because for you, its charcoal or bust.
—hates cooking at home
This article appears in Mar 12-18, 2009.
14 Comments
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Threaten to give it a good thrashing like Basil Fawlty did with his car, that might help. Seriously though, it might be time for a tech to show up, maybe it needs some TLC.
Buy an oven thermometer and put it inside and turn the heat to 400 and wait. When the red light goes off open the oven and check the temp.
Simple maths can figure out the percentage error.
Don’t bother with a tech.
Not a bad idea Joeblow, never thought of that 1.
turn it to 200 when you want 325, maybe that’ll work.
If you are a woman consider hooking up with a chef.
If not hook up with a woman.
If that doesn’t work hook up with someone who can stay in the kitchen long enough to check the oven.
Or if it’s Monday wander down to The Fireside for Martini Monday (it’s cheaper and the olives are OK)
Thanks Joeblow, but I am a pastry cook, and the OP. I just happen to have a crap oven in my apartment, but your insight was truly enlightening.
is it one of those crap nearly-half-sized ovens that they keep shoving in apartments these days?
I have yet to obtain one that isn’t relatively fucked yet.
Yep, zZz, it is one of those! Maybe I’m just getting picky because I’m used to having ovens around me that are perfect and technologically advanced in every conceivable way… And then I come home to the hunk of junk in my kitchen, haha.
Hi salizar the pastry chef. Now I understand your frustration.
I once had a job where I was paid to go to various places around the globe to, shall we say, solve a problem. I had people to clean my space, make my bed, cook my food, serve my food and call me ‘Sir’. I can’t cook and as I tell my kids ‘That’s why I got married’
I feel like “joeblow” and “the gentleman” are buddies. Am I wrong?
Lang – NO.
Don’t have clue who “the gentleman’ is/was.
I wasn’t paid to be a gentleman.
I have a similar problem with my crap half-sized apartment oven.. but in reverse! I can crank that sucker to max and it takes FOREVER to cook anything!
Yo Lang – the answer to your question should have been ‘Yes you are wrong’. Excuse me,the brain cells don’t always function well.
Just Google the name of the manufacturer and contact them. Or your landlord. If it was me I’d unplug the damn thing until I found out what was happening.
Those things suck the big one…
ours has a short and so the entire top surface heats up if you turn on the front left burner.
total pieces of crap.
I always enjoy cooking at anyone’s place but my own. Always more counter space, better equipment, and usually an over sized or double-sink to drool over.
One day…..