Glad when fall/winter comes again

It’s not so much the heat as the humidity. It’s brutal. I usually walk about 5-7 kms a day normally but I can hardly get five blocks in the blistering downtown area. I’m drinking water like a fucking camel and sweating like a diseased jockstrap. This is no fun, especially when I get behind three morbidly obese waddlers trucking down the sidewalk and stumbling over their cascading belly rolls.

The next person I hear complaining about the heat is getting knocked the f— out. I have been waiting all winter for summer.

I like it hot. Really hot.

Thanks for the comp, Qwertworth, you come up with some pretty crackerjack quips yourself. Morbidly obese people don’t seem to bother me the rest of the year but, during the summer, my peepers are assaulted and beaten by the sight of clingy tanktops barely holding together deflating zepplins, jellified arms that look like mutant babies and bellies that look like stacked fifty pound potato bags – let’s not forget the massive thighs encased in straining sweatpants and orange dollar store Crocs. I understand about being overweight, I’m about 165 myself but I try to keep in shape by walking, eating my veggies and popping my Prozac daily. What I fail to understand is how you’d ever let yourself get to the point where your ass needs its own MLA. You’d think a bell would ring in your head once you started using Toledo scales. I worked as a cartoonist for a couple of years, back in the late 80s and early 90s. I’d like to get back into it sometime – maybe do a strip about a bitch board or something.

TTFN – now that’s a comic I could see myself reading… and maybe starring in … I often thought the same thing about grossly overweight people, because I’ve always had my own inner alarm that goes off when my weight reaches a certain point (usually over Christmas), and I exercise and eat properly until I’m back to normal. I don’t understand people who keep growing and growing, and just say “whatever”…Rainbo, that’s two newbies today… Makes me wonder what the other lurkers think…Informal poll (for lurkers – come out, come out wherever you are!):1. Who are your top 3 posters?2. Who are your 3 least favorite posters?I’ll think of more later.

BTW who’s the other newbie Q..???

I generally enjoy the Bad Guy, TTFN, and Floyd. There are others. (I suspect we’ll see some gender lines emerge here?)I’m reluctant to mention least favorites lest I bring on the wrath of the Bitch Gods. But I think I’m safe with Kay and Coyotex. There are a couple of others I find rather tedious but people seem to enjoy their always-predictable know-it-all schtick so I’ll zip it.

This doesn’t mean you can invent a bunch of H-identities and list me as your least favorite, turd.

My favorites are floyd (d-uh), Miles (d-uh), poop (D-UH!), Mirand-uh, Beav & TTFN. My favorite new people are hedgy and bad(ass) guy. Remains to be seen how those who just emerged from Lurker’s Village turn out.My least favorite don’t need to be said.Gingy, you are in a class all your own, dear.

I knew I would get people’s curiosity up. It’s def not qwerty or miles, I’ll say that much 😉

My favs are Qwerty, poop and Miles – among the guys, Bad Guy and Floyd. And let’s not forget the Beav. Rosie’s cruise ship hasn’t. The one poster I haven’t missed is matt – he could be quite clever and witty when he wasn’t pounding out his inner Sybil in CAPS and giving me a migrane. As for Ginger, she’s kinda like an earthworm on the sidewalk – you might as well step over her and just keep on walking.

Incidentally I picture Hedgy sort of the same way, but without quite so much mean and tough. That might just be the power of suggestion – real hedgehogs ARE awfully cute.

Trouble with this game is you make a short list and not everyone can be on it… Hedgy didn’t make my top 3 because she is too new.. Give her time…Poop,,, one of my favourites from way back, posted today which was really great, but admits she hasn’t posted as much lately… But I most definately agree with Jammie re M&Q as the K&Q of bitch…Jammie together now: We’re NOT WORTHY..!!!

Ooooh! I wanna play! My favorites are Alison, Classic Ginger, and the gone but not forgotten Raina. Seriously. Think about it. When have we had more fun on this board than when we had some succulent nugget of crazy to rip to shreds? My number one fave is Alison. In the words of the immortal Qwerty, Alison was the prize in the flamers’ lottery.

TTFN nah sweety i’m a cashew not a worm 😛

BEAV, dude. You really didn’t get that? I might have to take you off my list!!Come on.Your name…. A boatload of lesbians…Hmmmm?

And I will say without hesitation that my least favorite posters are H-bomb, Coyotoxin, and Lilac. Looooong, tedious, preachy, humourless posts devoid of entertainment value.

OMG, this is too funny!!And here I thought there was nothing good on on Friday Night!Can I sign all your yearbooks too?

A riddle for Miranda,,, what’s worse than a Coyotoxic Lilac H-Bomb…???Give up..??? K..

Keep talking like that is going to get you a kick in the nuts…

The Beav = Leave It To Beaver (“why do you have to be so hard on the Beav?”) but I thought there was some implication that I might be a scissorer by the Rosie reference. I forgot that she was just here with a whole boatload of beav, now I’m back on track, sorry TTFN! Jammie, name it, anything to stay on the list!

Do any of you remember the urban myth from the 70’s which was that the kid that played The Beav (Jerry Mather) had grown up to be Vincent Furnier aka Alice Cooper…???

HaHA! You’re giving up your age, Floyd. I remember that legend too.

Jam that makes total sense.., I never heard about that interview.. Thanks.Miranda, you’re right kay’s not an idiot but she’s sure got edge…And passion.

I still have a lot to do this summer but I do love the fall here.I Hate Air Conditioning with a passion. I have it in my car and never ever use it, I am pro window opener.The Air Conditioner in my office is killing me! I hate it. I almost want to quit over it and I like the career choice.

Not a bad Idea TTFN…I hear the end is nigh. I guess it’s a good thing guys are wearing those flood proof capri-pants now too if it’s going to be Ark weather outside.

Oh Miles, you know I love the thread-weaving.

We really gave it to her good over the desi thing, and she took it, and just kept coming back…

LOL. Not bad huh?

Your new best told us she is not a worm but a cashew. I have no idea where it came from really. And I pictured a tiny shriveled and curved penis, and ran with it.

Oh wait, I do know where it came from. It was the box of chocolates reference that you teased her about. And someone else – Miles i think – said some chocolates are sweet n nutty….

chase out? lol never i got nine lives i keep coming back 😛 pfffffffffft.

Oh, she’s a cat-shew. *groan*

I’d prefer eternal spring. Not Halifax spring, but a real one with sunshine. And I think Floyd is pretty handy with imaginary machines….he might have a weather maker kicking around somewhere.

I was going to go with Cat’s shoe…but wasn’t sure if it was close enough to cashew to convey the pun. Mittens it is. Or Boots. I had a cat named boots once….Mittens it is then.

So Boots it is then…Gingy, can you change your screen name to Boots, please?Thanks hun, luv ya!

Ah the cashew is such a versatile nut it seems…

I’m not sure if I should be gravely insulted or highly honored by the comments in this post.Jammie has no love for me because I defend old women and free thinking. Since I’m always rooting for the underdog I’m not sure why Jammie doesn’t love me.Gotta love qwerty (and I do) but Miranda, I’m touched. I never expected kind words from you. WowI think the rest of you are simply scared that I challenge your intelligence. I use the over-the-top examples to try and draw a bigger picture that the average joe can get their head around (ie, police state comparisons with regard to bylaw and such). The only person of real interest to me was scared off by the lot of you. How I long for the wisdom of Desi to be shed on the many small minds that visit this site.As for the OP, heat, I wonder why if we can “seed” clouds with silver iodide to make it rain, can’t we use the same logic to make it snow in the north and possibly slow down the melting of our north pole and reduce saline levels in our oceans? Hmmm… just a thought.

Suddenly my respect for Jammie is restored. As long as I’m not right on the bottom of said list… Thanks J

I see why you’re frustrated, Jammie. Pride is the nature of posting on the internet. People feel important when they see themselves in print and can show it to others. Same is true for TV. If you’re ever on TV or in a group shot just take note before you look, it’s only natural to look for yourself. People feel important when they post here. They feel like they have to bless us with their wisdom and I’m one of them. So are you *wink*

“educate the masses”See? You’re just like me… but older… and blackhaha

I dunno about tha pride thingKay. It’s not about feeling important for me. I started posting because I missed Halifax and I saw in LTWWB the type of community that I was missing. I got tired of reading about home, and wanted to connect with that (i think uniquely) maritime way of bitching about everyone and everything to pass the time, but knowing that at the end of the day we are all just folks in the same boat. It’s community like you don’t get everywhere else in the world. I don’t post on LTWWB to read what I already know I think, it is to read about what you and everyone else thinks. But if nobody posted there would be no discussion, and no community.

I should add too, that I don’t think I am unique in being a displaced maritmer that sees a little bit of home on the threads of LTWWB either.

well gee thanks jammie (head butts you with her ahem spikey head).Ok Kay occasionally rubs me the wrong way, but at least when she makes a statement, she sticks around to defend it. I get annoyed with the people who make outrageous or mean comments, then just disapear…..

has miles ever been properly flamed or been accused of being a troll? he seems so level headed and poppa smurf, but maybe way back when he first appeared on the scene?

He was flamed, once, but it was pretty weak. I think we accused him of being slightly less articulate that day than normal, over a misplaced apostrophe or something.

That fuckin’ apostrophe. I’ll knock it down a peg or two. *Pow* *sock*That,s it. You,re my bitch now apostrophe. Now you are a fuckin, comma. How y,all likin, that? Huh? You,ll stay down there ,till you lean to not embarass me.

That was rather clever Miles.