Film + TV

Failing in nearly all aspects, here comes the latest fairy tale turned hyper-action flick, Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters. After escaping from near death in a candy house as children, the sibling duo of Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton make a career out of shotgunning evil witches via a number of widely anachronistic weapons. But […]

Movie 43 is a series of short segments, all connected under the guise of a gross-out comedy. Ultimately, it’s really just a lousy movie. Its ensemble cast, including Halle Berry, Kate Winslet, Hugh Jackman and Naomi Watts, to name only a few, makes it seem more promising than it is. The one exception is Veronica, […]

Hey, you know that same Jason Statham movie that comes out every 10 months? Well, this time, Jennifer Lopez is needlessly crammed into the plot. Lo, we have Parker, the newest film adaptation of the crime novel series that also brought us Point Blank and Payback. Statham, as Parker, is a thief with a code […]

Arnold is back, rising once again from obsolescence—and helping us forget his time as a duly elected political official—with the wham-bang action flick The Last Stand. Schwarzenegger, here an overqualified sheriff of a sleepy southern border town, is thrust back into action when the world’s most dangerous drug kingpin escapes from the FBI and races […]

Jessica Chastain also starred in this movie, featuring less Osama Bin Laden and more twisty mother ghosts. When two little feral girls are found in a remote cabin, they’re taken in by their dead father’s brother (Nikolah Coster-Waldau) and his girlfriend (Chastain). Questions of how the children provided for themselves over the years they were […]

Hey guys, Dustin Hoffman directed a movie! Quartet has Hoffman lending his idiosyncratic touch to a story about some lovely, aged musicians being all old together. This light, ensemble comedy finds notable thespians Maggie Smith, Billy Connolly and Tom Courtenay as former opera singers and residents of a retirement home for gifted musicians. When financial […]

Broken City feels like watching a noir-ish cop drama, with plenty of ’80s synth soundtrack and darkly lit streets. Billy Taggart (Mark Wahlberg), a private investigator and ex-cop in New York, gets involved in the mayor’s (Russel Crowe) shady scheme of property development, murder and lies leading up to a municipal election, when he agrees […]

These wiseguys are taking over Los Angeles, see? It’d take a gaggle of chiseled coppers with more balls than brains to take on that lot. Such is the tired premise of Gangster Squad. Clad in fedoras and cheap cliches, Josh Brolin “acts” as a tough-as-nails copper who’d get away from all this gunfire with his […]