Hali Slam’s hard words

After every haircut at Phat’s barbershop, I’m assured that
this haircut will get me laid. I feel that’s much more likely if I go
to the Halifax Slam Poetry fundraiser, Oral Tradition, hosted by
Picnicface members Brian MacQuarrie and Bill Wood.

“Tired of sitting at home touching yourself?” asks Stephanie Lent,
sex poet and Hali Slam team alternate. “Well then, come out to Gus’ Pub
on Wednesday, September 2 and get touched by some dirty poets! The
Halifax Slam Poetry Team is oiling up for a night of music, prizes and
poetry, pertaining to parts of themselves that once were considered
private. We will come baring open minds, legs and an open mic, so bring
any poetry, music or talent of your own that’ll make ’em drool from all
orifices.”

The tongue-in-cheek-titled Oral Tradition is part of Hali Slam’s
efforts to raise the $10,000 necessary to get the team to Victoria, BC,
in November to compete in the Canadian Festival of Spoken Word. They’re
defending Halifax’s streak of two straight victories. Prizes for the
fundraiser include an autographed copy of Bill Clinton’s My
Life. Lent finds this a humorous auction item for a night entitled
Oral Tradition: “If you guess why, you get the cigar,” she quips.

This year’s all-new team includes political fast-rap, ginger giant
Hermitofthewoods (Michael McGuire); breakdancing educator David Zinck;
’90s rapper-turned-poetic- preacher Marvin Trimm—whose poetry about
Martin Luther King was enjoyed by King’s wife Coretta, and who has
shared studios with Marky Mark—and emotionally driven mental health
worker Laura Burke, who claims poetry has kept her sane. The only thing
this team has in common are minds that dwell in the dirtiest of
gutters.

Trimm, a former rapper, police officer and bodybuilder, describes
his stomach when he was in shape “as a delectable, hard-steel showcase
of firm rocks.” The Bermudan is preparing a piece called “Role Play:”
“No need for triple x-ray vision, because I see you…I see through
that see-through nightie.”

Sexed-up poetry for the evening will range from Zinck’s
testicle-driven poem “Werewolf,” where he declares “I’m pouring out so
much pheromone, the raw scent of attraction and desire that when
passing dogs sniff me, they grow their balls back and run howling down
the street,” to Lent’s poetry, which Zinck describes as very “in your
face—or in your vagina, if you prefer.”

Lent considers her sexually explicit poetry to be empowering.

“I think that all female performers are feminists because they’re
altering the status quo. I don’t have to talk about women’s rights to
be fighting for them,” she says. But her words sometimes do cause
trouble. “I did a poem about having sex with god and the devil and
ending up a lesbian,” she remembers. “The high school kids liked it,
but my reborn ex-drama teacher wasn’t the biggest fan. Ipso facto:
Steph’s not allowed to do poetry in school district 22.”

All of this heat should make Oral Tradition into a sexy good
time.

“It’s a band of poets, in a bar, reading sex-themed poetry,” says
McGuire. “I would expect debauchery, a bit of sleaze and a whole lot of
fun. And there’s an open mic. That promises to be interesting, to say
the least.”

Lent agrees. “Get out and get off while helping your local slam
poetry team head to nationals in Victoria,” she says. “Come one, come
all over the place…”

This article appears in Aug 27 – Sep 2, 2009.