A plume of smoke rises above a huge box store. No, it’s not the
apocalypse, I decide, when the sweet smell of flaming ground intestines
in a semi-edible casing enters my flaring nostrils. I’ve found the
staple of DIYers everywhere: the barbecue-on-wheels that lives outside
building supply warehouses.
My assignment: Find the best of Halifax’s building supply store hot
dog stands. I’ve recruited an entire family—Andrew, of sensitive
stomach; Laura, lifelong vegetarian and Georgia, 18-month-old baby, to
taste and test all the things I won’t have room for.
We won’t find a dog better than the one in my hand right now,
though. We’re standing outside Pierceys (2854 Robie), gazing down at an
impressively large menu of toppings and condiments next to a broad
selection of ice-cold colas and juices. There are five patio tables for
tube-food enjoyment, and even a selection of toys for the kids, free of
charge.
I order the hot Italian sausage ($3.75) from the seven possible
tube-meat options. Eyeing the endless condiment tray, I choose red and
yellow jalepeno peppers, sauerkraut, mustard and ketchup. The added
heat of the peppers takes the hot sausage to volcanotown. The only
complaints I hear come from my intestines. Andrew eats half and loves
it.
Laura orders the veggie dog ($3.75). It’s one of the beany-soy-ish
dogs, and she’s not disappointed. We guzzle our pop. Little Georgia
attempts to guzzle her free Matchbox car.
Next stop: Rona (350 Horseshoe Lake Drive) in the BLIP. We spy a dog
cart to the right of the main entrance. There’s much less on offer, and
I realize we may have been spoiled at Pierceys. This guy’s dogs come
from a box at Costco. His whitebread buns are dry and bland. He has
ketchup, onions, two types of mustard and some bacon bits made of
reddish chunks of lead—almost impossible to chew, and likely having
similar long-term health effects. There are combo deals: hot dog, chips
and a can of pop are $4.50, “smokie” in the same combo form is $5.50. I
get a dog, force it down.
Well before Rona closes, the barbecue proprietor hooks his portable
dogshop up to his car and rolls away. Sitting at the hard picnic table,
I have a sensation similar to car-sickness, despite not moving at all.
My stomach acid swirls, occasionally coming up in squirts in the back
of my throat.
Down the road is Home Depot (368 Lacewood Drive). No barbecue smoke
rises here. I fear for the worst, but once we enter, we see Home Diners
Express. Dogs and sausages turn on hot rollers. Hamburgers! Submarine
sandwiches! Wraps! There’s even a selection of real breakfast
items, like eggs, bagels and the like. It’s definitely not a barbecue
with a trailer hitch on it, but for the discerning DIYer, it’s heaven.
There are even vegetables for the burgers!
Andrew orders the sausage. It’s OK, and just under four bucks. The
sauerkraut and yellowish relish improve it a bit. He likes it. I have a
bite and gag a little. (There’s nothing wrong with it; I just can’t eat
anymore.) Laura, on her second wind, orders the veggie burger. I watch
in shock as the man runs the bun through a previously unseen bun
toaster. Then he adds relish, tomato and lettuce to Laura’s soy-based
pattie, as she requested. “The vegetables are really nice,” she says,
sounding more surprised than impressed. I consider taking a bite, but
decide against giving myself any more ammunition in the barf war I’ve
started in my gullet.
It’s odd how many stores are like Kent—having only occasional
fundraiser barbecues and no regular dogfathers. After eating at
Pierceys’ miraculous stand, and after merely seeing the Lacewood Home
Depot’s cafe, it’s hard to believe a building supply store would do it
any other way.
This article appears in Aug 6-12, 2009.
Home Depot! Love the Home Diner’s Express, I’ve gone out there just for lunch with no project in mind at all, except to eat. The Diner’s Express staff are always super courteous, too.
You make a good point Neal–why don’t all building supply stores have these type eats? After all, customers tend to spend a lot of time in there by their nature, and having somewhere to grab a quick bite sure makes pondering paint chips and waiting for wood to be cut seem a whole lot more pleasant.
Neal Ozano you are hilarious haha
Hello,
This Is Nate Owner of the above mentioned, RONA Stand. I found a picture of this Neal and yes does look familiar ha I remember ya!
I can take the criticism, I’ve been learning a lot since i started and have only started 2 Months ago. First off of course I wanted to make sure I was doing everything in a safe manner and following Health Regulations to serve a dog that was first off safe, as cooking on the street is not always how we grew up cooking. Next trying to cater to the customers appeties, of course this is the tough one, So many customers so many tastes.
Yes I may Have a simple Menu, a hot dog and Sausage, But also as a new business I need to keep things simple as i Learn the Ropes…
Ha and funny thing is i sent this article to the coast to maybe to a spot on Hot Dogs stands in the city well they did! ha
I’ll try to improve in the mean time check out my Interview with a American Hot Dog Website, Where i discuss my beginnings and Home town of Halifax!
http://hotdogprofits.com/blog/hot-dog-cart…
Oh and Check MY Blog at
http://gonutzhfx.blogspot.com/
ha i just remember you were sitting there for the longest time Writing in your little notepad, You looked like a “Novelist” writing down the next chapter to your Big book, after suddenly gaining some inspiration from somewhere.
But no it was this article…
What I really like about this article is it is sort of written in the mock heroic style of Ignatius P. Reilly. And it’s about food carts, my latest obsession. We need more of them in Halifax. So would be cooks, here’s a DIY guide to starting a food cart.
http://newyork.grubstreet.com/2009/08/user…