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Savage Love

Quick and dirty Qs and As

Dan Savage’s reply all, from the mundane to the not-so-mundane.

Q My ex-girlfriend, who I dated for nine months, called me two months after we broke up and accused me of giving her HPV.

By Dan Savage Dec 5, 2019

Sex Sex + Dating Sex Advice relationships

PO’d about P-in-V

Asking for more from an anxious partner can be difficult, Dan Savage has tips.

QI'm a heterosexual cis woman in a monogamous marriage.

By Dan Savage Nov 28, 2019

Hot for student

The risks of professor-student hook-ups Plus: How to juggle IRL and online relationships.

Q I'm a 40-something gay male professor at a small college.

By Dan Savage Nov 21, 2019

Sissy that talk

How can I stop my heterosuckual boyfriend from being jealous when I get more attention at kink parties?

Q My boyfriend and I met online to explore our kinks.

By Dan Savage Nov 14, 2019

Sex Sex + Dating Sex Advice relationships

The man show

How to get my peer group to reject the rapey guy. Plus: My condition for letting a married friend have sex with me.

Q I am male.

Nov 7, 2019

Quickie thinking

From "don’t touch me" vibes to sex work as a second job, the Qs and As are coming fast.

Q My little dick has always held me back.

By Dan Savage Oct 31, 2019

Sex Sex + Dating Sex Advice relationships

Cheaters’ club

How a couple of scandalous sluts can make a relationship work. Plus: The best way to tell the husband it’s over.

Q I am a guy in my 40s and a classic sexual scoundrel.

By Dan Savage Oct 24, 2019

Why we set impossibly high standards

Sometimes it’s not them, it really is you. Plus: Dealing with your relative’s porn collection.

QI'm a Seattle local who basically grew up reading your column.

By Dan Savage Oct 17, 2019

Sex Sex + Dating Sex Advice relationships

Three-city swing

An over-abundance of sexy quickies and relationship advice, for questions brought back from a Savage Love Live tour.

We brought Savage Love Live to the Music Box Theatre in Chicago, the Barrymore Theatre in Madison, Wisconsin and the Pantages Theatre in Minneapolis over three nights.

By Dan Savage Oct 10, 2019

Bad guys

A blow-and-go arrangement only works if it gets you off. Plus: Why saying the word “vagina” is important.

QI met a guy right around the time my boyfriend dumped me. I met him on a dating site, but he was really only interested in my boobs and me giving him head.

By Dan Savage Oct 3, 2019

Mom and I know about dad’s cross-dressing kink

But when it comes to sex and secrets, do we have to tell him?

Q I'm a 35-year-old bisexual man in a LTR with a man. My question, however, has to do with my parents.

By Dan Savage Sep 26, 2019

Sex Sex + Dating Sex Advice relationships

Parenting the pubescent bondage kinkster

How to do right by a 12-year-old son who’s really into handcuffs.

Q My son has always liked handcuffs and tying people up as a form of play.

By Dan Savage Sep 19, 2019

Sex Sex + Dating Sex Advice relationships

Fists of pleasure, fists of roommate irritation

Opening wide about which fisting concerns are valid, and how strap-ons compare to dildos.

Q My roommate is a gay man who is into getting fisted.

By Dan Savage Sep 12, 2019

Sex Sex + Dating Sex Advice relationships

What’s the deal with physical ideals?

How far to go with a boyfriend who’s really into the "suicide girl" look.

QI don’t listen to your podcast religiously, but as soon as I told my best friend this story, she said, “That’s a question for Dan Savage!” Backstory: I have a monogamous partner who I live with.

By Dan Savage Sep 5, 2019

Sex Sex + Dating Sex Advice relationships