Lifestyle

Savage Love

Can people be bad at sex?

Can people be bad at sex?

Where objectivity meets subjectivity, plus lots more quickie questions.
QI don't want to become one of those people who write to you complaining about how I married someone I wasn't sexually compatible with 10 years ago and now my sex life still sucks.

By Dan Savage May 28, 2020

Power players

Power players

Getting turned on by Nazis, and worried about the kinksters next door.
QHere's a non-COVID question for you: I’m a queer white female in a monogamish marriage.

By Dan Savage May 21, 2020

Is it a problem if my horrible boyfriend leaves?

Is it a problem if my horrible boyfriend leaves?

Plus: Do I have to tell him he’s got herpes?
QIt's taken a lot to do this, but here goes.

By Dan Savage May 14, 2020

One marriage, two sex drives

One marriage, two sex drives

What to do when half of a couple wants something the other half isn’t into.
QI’ve been with the same amazing man a dozen years.

By Dan Savage May 7, 2020

How much libido is too much libido?

How much libido is too much libido?

"A lot of people will say they wish they had this problem, but it’s interfering with my daily activities because I can’t focus on anything else."
QI'm a 31-year-old female.

By Dan Savage Apr 30, 2020

Stop with the secrets already

Stop with the secrets already

Except for one that’s important to your wife’s self esteem.
Q I was raised in a religious home and didn’t lose my virginity until the embarrassing age of 26.

By Dan Savage Apr 23, 2020

The trouble with swallowing and more quickie answers to sex questions

The trouble with swallowing and more quickie answers to sex questions

Does this column have cheating? Check. Feeling constrained by monogamy? Check. Absolutely no mention of world health problems? Checkity check.
QI am a super-queer-presenting female who recently accepted that I have desires for men. My partner of two years is bisexual and understands the desires, but has personally dealt with those desires via masturbation while my desires include acting. Her perspective is that the grass is greener where you water it and that my desire to act is immature, selfish and has an unrealistic end game. What gives when you don't feel fulfilled sexually in a monogamous relationship? —Open Or Over?

By Dan Savage Apr 16, 2020

The no-pandemic challenge

The no-pandemic challenge

By popular demand, this week’s "Savage Love" is (almost) COVID-19-free.
QYour last two columns and your last two podcasts were all about the

By Dan Savage Apr 11, 2020

Open and shut: pandemic polygamy

Open and shut: pandemic polygamy

You can think about it and talk about it, but this isn't the time to go ahead and open up your marriage.
QMy husband and I got married in August of 2019 and we were together for over five years before getting married.

By Dan Savage Apr 2, 2020

How to maintain intimacy during a time of isolation

How to maintain intimacy during a time of isolation

Holing up, supporting sex workers and being less awkward on videochat.
QMy question is on managing “gray area” intimacies during the pandemic. I have a lover/friend that I’ve been hanging out with—fucking, drinking tea, going on hikes, eating ice cream, watching movies and other activities—for about nine months.

By Dan Savage Mar 29, 2020

Quickies in the time of COVID-19

Quickies in the time of COVID-19

Sex advice that happens to be from a coronavirus hotspot.
Q I'm wondering if you know of a word that describes the fetish of getting off from talking dirty.

By Dan Savage Mar 19, 2020

Brownie points

Brownie points

What to do when you’re stuck in a shitty situation Plus: Smoking kills (relationships).
Q I'm a cis bi woman, and I mainly have sex with people with penises.

By Dan Savage Mar 12, 2020

Sleep apnea and oral sex, a full-throated investigation

Sleep apnea and oral sex, a full-throated investigation

Navigating kinks with your doctor, your significant other and yourself
Q I'm a middle-aged gay man and I was recently diagnosed with sleep apnea.

By Dan Savage Mar 5, 2020

Spit and polish

Spit and polish

How to overcome your turn-offs. Plus: Getting over your ex, one sexual experience at a time.
Q I'm a 31-year-old cis bisexual woman.

By Dan Savage Feb 27, 2020

Prone to failure

Prone to failure

Delayed ejaculation is a thing; here’s how to overcum it **Plus:** Throw that FWB in the TRASH.
Q I'm 20, straight, male, fit and active.

By Dan Savage Feb 20, 2020

A peg above the rest

A peg above the rest

Exploring female-led relationships Plus: The wonders of knife-less breast enhancement.
Q My boyfriend and I were having relationship issues until we tried something new: pegging.

By Dan Savage Feb 13, 2020

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