Romeo and Juliet

An obscure English play gets adapted, yet again, in the entirely unnecessary Romeo and Juliet. The annoyingly named Juliet Capulet (Hailee Steinfeld) and playboy Romeo Montague (Douglas Booth) fall madly in love despite their families' longstanding blood feud. Spoiler alert! Things don't end well. Director Carlo Carlei takes no risks with his lukewarm attempt at Shakespeare, pumping scenes full of second-rate costumes and high school theatre levels of acting. Steinfeld, all of only 14, is still too strong-jawed and ironed to make work Juliet's dainty, medieval servitude. Paul Giamatti acts orbital fucking circles around everyone as the Friar, while Homeland's Damian Lewis plays Lord Capulet with a half-Cockney, Monty Python kinda thing. Billing itself as the most dangerous love story of all time, Romeo and Juliet couldn't play it any safer. —Jacob Boon