| Published June 29, 2006. |
Farewell to Ms Nova Scotia
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Farewell to Nova Scotia, you backwards 'Alabama of the North'. I loved you, but you just couldn't stay up to date, do the things I wanted to do, or accept me for who I am. Sure, I supported you for a while, but you took me for granted, making me pay thousands on an education I can't even use around you. I had to leave, and when I left, all you did was yell at me for how I took you for granted, though you couldn't even use me! Not only did you get pricey, but preachy too. You never let me choose what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it. For example, I really wanted to cook a nice pot roast for us for Sunday dinner, but alas the corner store only had spam, and the grocery stores were all closed. So spam it was. I wanted to fix that deck you were bitching at me about for months, but alas, the hardware stores all were closed, so I had to listen to you holler for yet another day. "Maybe next week" I said, "after I work at my poor-paying job all week, and go grocery shopping in the crowds next Saturday". For Christ's sake, even at our impromptu spam picnic on Sunday, I couldn't even open a fine bottle of vino to share, as I could only find us some beer (good beer mind you, but nothing goes with spam like a fine pinot grigio). Oh I loved you Nova Scotia, with those heaving hills to the north and your lush valley, but I have to leave you. I've found a new love, in the comforting bed of Miss Ontario, where we can help each other, learn, make love without worry, and buy a friggin' pot roast on a Sunday. Maybe if you change your ways I will come crawling back, but til then, I pray for all your remaining lovers that you will be fair and listen to them someday.
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Lost love
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