Dear Shitty Neighbours

You might consider getting into screaming matches with each other every other day a sign that your relationship is unhealthy. You might also consider that slamming doors to punctuate your emotions is childish and disruptive to other tenants. If you insist in staying in a relationship that obviously makes you both miserable, please refrain from having outbursts between the hours of 11pm and 6am. –Sincerely, Your Tired & Frustrated Neighbour