Excuse me, "Sir or M'am"

I don't care if it makes you feel old when I call you Sir or M'am. It's what I was told to call people when I was younger to be courteous and polite. So don't tell me how old it makes you feel or that your real name is Lester; I didn't want to talk to you in the first place. Sir or M'am, I just wanted you to get the fuck out of my way so I could get into an elevator without smashing you with my gym bag... and sometimes I just want to thank you politely for putting my groceries into the bag, Sir or M'am. I wasn't putting you down, I was doing my best to show you respect. You don't have to get upset or start a conversation about how you're not a "military officer". I know you're not a military officer, you're packing my fucking groceries. —Hey YOU