Brooms are for sweeping with

To the unreasonable insomniac living downstairs, I hope you feel ridiculous as you bang on your ceiling with that broom. Do you know what I was doing just now? I was standing still and putting moisturizer on my face. Since you can't seem to stop making complaints to the landlord about how loud I supposedly am, I went and had a read through the noise bylaw, and there's nothing in it about skincare routines. I'm not clog dancing up here, I'm not playing the drums, I don't even have people over very often. I hear you moving around down there all day every day too, I just don't feel the need to go crying about it, even when you're making you're weird squeaky sex noises! Get a life, or better yet, a new apartment. —Perfectly quiet girl