Best Musician

His porn name is Jingles DeLong, but that’s not what’s so great about this guy. He’s young and he’s having fun—oh, and he’s kind of a musical virtuoso, too. He’ll remember your name, and a little something about you even if he only meets you once. And talk! He can really talk. For his day job, he’s a carpenter, but if there’s any justice, starting soon he’ll be building his music career full-time.

Runner-up: Al Tuck