Saturday, February 15, 2020

Posted By on Sat, Feb 15, 2020 at 11:20 AM

To the two couples having a posh dinner at around 6pm. I AM SO SO SORRY. I thought I could be as quiet as I could in blowing my nose but failed. My dear friend did mention it and I felt so very embarrassed. I was very tempted to pay for each of your desserts but I only thought of that gesture too late. So I ask you to please forgive me, and I hope both tables who heard me had a good night. Once again, I apologize. — Malh

Wednesday, September 18, 2019

Posted By on Wed, Sep 18, 2019 at 1:25 PM

To the #7 bus driver on Tuesday afternoon: Sorry I jumped in to ask you if you could call transit dispatch and report a bus with serious mechanical problems. It was leaking a lot of smoking fluid all over Gottingen Street, and I kinda panicked and must have seemed intense with urgency. You seemed worried, maybe about your personal safety, and said no and drove on. I totally get it, and I wish I had been more composed, I know you already put up with all sorts of difficult situations every day on the job. Sorry!
—A Chastised Alarm-giver

Tuesday, July 16, 2019

Posted By on Tue, Jul 16, 2019 at 7:38 AM

I've always tipped well for every service in Halifax because I know what it's like out here in the hospitality industry—but my hanger got the best of me at a certain pizza place on Saturday, where I angrily put in a $0 tip because my pickup order had been delayed for an hour due to a glitch in the online order. You didn't deserve that. I'll return for more 'za soon and, this time, leave and doubly good tip. —Hangry, now regretful, gal

Monday, July 15, 2019

Posted By on Mon, Jul 15, 2019 at 3:47 PM

I'd like to give a shout out to everyone working this past week in customer service and food service who rocked their jobs in this sweltering weather! I see you! You're all working so hard and still manage to be so pleasant, air conditioner or not, and I appreciate that.
PS: Don't forget to tip minimum-wage earners!
Sweaty backs unite!

Tuesday, July 9, 2019

Posted By on Tue, Jul 9, 2019 at 3:10 PM


I saw you at the most recent HomeBass. You were dressed in green neon and grooving effortlessly on the dance floor. I took your cool neon sunglasses and you slapped me for it. I think I fell in love right then and there. I hope I see your red hair at another event, you're truly something special.—Not cool enough for you

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Posted on Wed, Sep 14, 2016 at 4:00 AM

To the HRP officer, who stopped me on Bayers Road the other day: Yes, I am eternally grateful that you cancelled the very expensive MVA ticket, after I had taken care of all the issues that were obviously wrong with my motorbike permit and insurance. And while continued ignorance might have been continued bliss, now, I figure you may have saved me from much, much bigger trouble ahead. Thanks again. —ADHD Biker Chick

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Posted on Thu, Oct 30, 2014 at 4:00 AM

I'm 110 pounds. I eat three meals a day. I occasionally indulge in a tub of Ben & Jerry's or a bag of Doritos. You're 210 pounds. You eat three meals a day. You occasionally indulge in a tub of Ben & Jerry's or a bag of Doritos. You can whisper "anorexic" and "skinny bitch" when I walk past. I can whisper "morbidly obese" and "fat cow" when you walk past. Oh wait. I can't. That would be "rude". —one shamed, skinny bitch.