Wednesday, October 26, 2016

A day as soon as eternity

Posted on Wed, Oct 26, 2016 at 4:00 AM

Thought I was getting to the other side of this heart wreck after some time, distance and meeting new people - and then today, of course, I bump into a stranger who reminds me so much of you I almost wanted to hug them and start crying. What is this encounter supposed to mean? Nothing, by logic, but my foolish heart is countering with nonsense. I miss you so much. I wish I could do or say something to win you over, to show you I could make you happy and support you in whatever you wanted to do, but there is no such story-line. You've found happiness with someone wonderful, and as much as it hurts me to acknowledge it, I know it's best for you. Besides, what fears I would have of letting you down, of knowing for certain I could not bring you happiness. The dark, invisible weight of losing your closeness has been crushing, worse when exposed to the silence of space, but it is nothing compared to the poverty my soul would surely suffer from failing you. That is something I would not want to survive. —An old friend

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