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Monday, January 9, 2017

Head's Up (actually written by a health care professional)

Posted on Mon, Jan 9, 2017 at 9:44 AM

Born in Amsterdam, moved to Canada when I was 11. No accent in either language. In your face! If my profile goes right over your head, then it should go right over you head.

FULL DISCLOSURE: If a college degree is your last form of education, I'm not interested unless it's the Julliard School of Arts. If your body type isn't athletic, I'm not interested. I spend two hours every morning killing myself in the gym, I expect any woman I'd date to be equally concerned about their physical appearance. I'm aware I look young. I'm a dermatologist and I've taken care of myself. I'm lucky and had parents who took care of me. Some of the people who message me are years younger than me and look really... sorry but.. old. All that drinking, tanning and whatever else you did when you were 16-23 has come back to say hello. Sorry. :-(

I'm not really into girls that are unoriginal and just go on about how much they love their family and the outdoors. Yawn. Girls with lots of pics of them with booze, pretend mustaches (ugh), heinous tattoos that you're already regretting, lots of friends in their pics, them shooting guns or catching fish, etc. need not waste your time. I'm looking for someone that is super smart, fit, attractive and creative. If you speak Dutch, Russian, or German, even better! I speak French fluently but I don't speak it anymore. My girlfriend of 12 years died in a car accident and she was French so... But time heals all wounds, I hope?

If you to tell men that you're not looking for "intimate encounters" or any other euphemism in your profile, you need not message me. It's a sign of either low-intelligence or you're trying to project something insecure. News flash: most men on this site want intimate encounters; you telling them not to ask for one isn't going to stop them. You SHOULD know that. To normal men like myself, it comes off as insecure or just makes you sound kind of dumb. Moreover, since 97% of women's profiles have this disclaimer, it wears thin and it's kind of pretentious. What kind of woman would go on a date without vetting the guy first to make sure he's looking for what you want.

It's so refreshing to see a woman whose profile doesn't go on about loving family, loving the outdoors and doesn't have some lame disclaimer about intimate encounters. Here, I'll show you how dumb it looks.

"Please don't message me for hook-ups or intimate encounters. I'm not interested."

NO SH*T SHERLOCK!! Who the hell would hook up with someone they met off a dating website. I'm a physician. Imagine if I came to your work and walked around telling everyone, "please don't ask me about a weird mole you found on your back". Moreover, who DOESN'T like their family or the outdoors. Why don't you add that you like clean clothes and water too? Damn.

If I don't respond to you, it's because I'm either not attracted to you or something in your profile. I have an extremely good job but I've worked incredibly hard to get where I am and I'm probably way, way, way out of your league. Only someone in my league would be able to convince me otherwise. Been a while since I got an A+ in Stats but I'd say it's under 0.1% that that will happen. Just tired of dating doctors, nurses and especially pre-med wannabes who want to use me for my looks and help them pass their MCATs. Do what we all did, study and/or cheat.

One in a 100 is worth the 10 mins it took to write this. Unless I'm in OT. 12 on, 12 off. 3 and then 4.

Thanks for the precious memories. —Sad for you

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