Recently, in an attempt to accomplish some Christmas shopping (if I dare use the C-word) , I darkened the doorway of a certain retail establishment for the very first time. This very successful business caters to a certain physical and spiritual practice that is purported to induce a calm meditative approach to life. Given that, I expected to be greeted either by library-esque silence or possibly Glenn Gould's recording of Bach's Goldberg Variations playing softly in the background. Instead, I stepped through the doorway into a blaring wall of sound. And not good sound. The music struck me as some sort of screechy tween drivel. My immediate reaction was: WTF? I can't understand why anyone would feel the need to blast the music so loudly in a retail outlet. The staff were pleasant and helpful but the racket was ungodly. The remainder of my Christmas shopping will be down elsewhere. —Bilateral transfer